Blush
by Naive-Symphony
Summary: I knew I shouldn't have walked inside. I knew I should've just kept walking instead of letting my curiosity get the best of me. What I didn't know was that this would be the beginning of something amazing.
1. Chapter 1

I do not own Kingdom Hearts, or any of the other copyrighted things mentioned in this story etc. etc. etc

Enjoy, you guys :)

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I had walked by it so many times before, but for some reason it seemed to be much more obvious now. It was almost as if the store was the only one on the street, and I was the only bystander; but at the same time I couldn't help but feel like every single creature on that street was staring at me as I awkwardly gazed into the windows. I went so far as to look around, half expecting all of the people walking by to hurriedly look away and continue what they were doing, but of course there was absolutely no one watching me. Everyone was wrapped up in their own little worlds with their own little problems. No one could care less about a 19 year-old kid (isn't that funny that I still call myself a kid?) standing in front of "Blush" with an uncomfortable expression marring his features.

With a large exhale, I decided that nobody gave a shit about whether or not I walked into this shop, and with this resolve I opened the door. A jingle cued the rest of the patrons in to the fact that someone else had walked into the store. I flinched, expecting dozens of pairs of accusing eyes to turn in my direction and stare daggers at me, making me feel guilty for even coming inside. Of course, this was the irrationality kicking in again. Nobody cared.

As I trudged farther inside the shop, I wandered over to the products lining the wall on the left side of the room. This seemed to be the area for the gag gifts (among other things). I found a bunch of boob-shaped paraphernalia ranging from pasta to pin cushions. I walked by water bottles in the shape of a penis and had to put a hand over my mouth to contain my laughter. I still feared drawing attention to myself in any way, shape or form. As I walked farther into the store, I saw what the store was really for.

Candy thongs, gummi bras, whipped cream, flavored lube, etc. etc. etc. It was like a fucking porno's goldmine. Farther back I came across the toys. Oh the toys. I felt myself begin to sweat, and wondered if the room had suddenly gotten a bit warmer since I'd first entered. The toys for women only mildly interested me, as I had pretty much come to terms with the fact that I was about as straight as a rainbow. A flaming rainbow. That was a little more accurate. My eyes flicked from one thing to another; a vibrator in the shape of a koala, a giant pink dildo, a toy in the shape of a tongue. A _tongue_? Seriously? Holy shit ladies! Then I came across the more hardcore items. There were strap-ons of various shapes and sizes, a whole section of bondage gear (complete with pink, fuzzy handcuffs), and a swing. Yes a swing. There were plenty of pictures on the box illustrating the various ways in which it could be used. Mildly arousing, yes. Oh so mildly.

I swear my nose almost started bleeding when I turned a corner and came face-to-face with a large poster that looked like it shoulda come right out of Playgirl magazine. There was, right in front of me, a blown up picture of a naked (very VERY naked) man, spread eagle for the world to see. And boy was he a sight to see. What I wouldn't give to have a private session with that piece of… wait. What am I thinking? I am so perverted sometimes it scares me. Ugh. If my friends only knew, oh if my FAMILY knew?!? How embarrassing. I hated how my mind always drifted to people I knew when I found myself suffering from "dirty fantasies" and such. It just made everything so awkward, thinking about how people you see on a day-to-day basis when you're doing something (or thinking about something) that's just downright… _dirty_.

I figured that I must've stepped into a "different" part of the store when I came across that poster (if you catch my drift). This room made the one up front seem almost innocent. There was aisle after aisle of DVDs with titles such as "Cum Closer" or "Legs Wide Open" or other clever titles such as these. I chuckled to myself, almost as if I had just shared a joke with someone, while in reality it was pretty much just me back there. I decided I should probably just head home, it was a feat in itself that I had managed to even come inside this store, let alone stay for so long. I doubted I'd have the guts to buy anything. Why was this all so awkward for me? I'm sure other guys had no problem going out and buying a bunch of sex paraphernalia without giving it a second thought. They probably didn't feel this uncomfortable.

With a sigh I started towards the front door. Maybe I'd come back another time, when I wouldn't feel so embarrassed about getting anything. Maybe some of that flavored lube for if I ever find a boyfriend, or perhaps just a vibrator to keep myself occupied until then. Ha ha. I must look so lonely coming into this kind of place by myself. I walked by an older lady reading a magazine at the cash register. If my senses hadn't already been numbed by pretty much everything in the building then I probably would have had a moment over the fact that this lady looked like she could have grandchildren and was reading a magazine that would give a nun a heart attack. I was almost to the door, almost safe, almost to the point when I could shake all of this off as a dream when the worst imaginable thing that could ever happen occurred.

"Roxas?"

I stopped. I could seriously die right here and now. Not only am I in a sex shop by myself where complete strangers can look at me and judge me and think that I must be a dirty, dirty boy whose mother didn't raise him right who must have nasty thoughts going through his mind like a speeding train on crack, but someone _recognized me_.

I tried to keep walking, hoping that it was a mistake. Roxas was a common name wasn't it? If I could lie to myself long enough to get out of here then everything would be ok; but of course fate wouldn't have it that way.

I felt a hand on my shoulder and flinched. A firm grasp turned me around and I was suddenly staring into bright green eyes.

This must be a nightmare. There is no possible way this situation could get any worse.

Standing in front of me was a tall, thin man wearing red converses, tight black jeans with a studded belt that hung tantalizingly over his hips, a white wife-beater, and a red zip-up hoodie that was open, as it wasn't too cool outside anymore. His hair was bright red and wildly growing in every direction, but still somehow looked amazingly good (and damn sexy). Those piercing green eyes were enhanced with the slightest bit of eyeliner that one could probably only see if they were as close as I happened to be right now. Identical tattoos of upside-down tear drops rested under each eye. Despite the fact that I was slowly melting into a puddle of self-loathing I had the time to think to myself how much that must've hurt.

"H-hey Axel," I managed to stutter out. This situation had hit rock bottom, might as well just play along and pick up the pieces of my shattered ego later.

"Wow Roxas, I'd have _never_ pegged you as the type to come into a store like this!" he stated with an excited gleam in his eye, like a child who had just been told a huge secret, one that was just too good to keep.

I just moaned internally. There was no way this could end good for me. Of all the people I could have run into (though preferably I would have like to run out of here without anyone recognizing me at all and pretend I had never walked into this godforsaken store) it had to be _him_.

Axel was a student at Twilight Town University, like myself. He was a senior however, and I a lowly freshman. We met on the first day of fall semester in a world literature class that we both shared. I had taken the class as a requirement for my major, but Axel was just trying out a few new classes now that he was almost ready to graduate. He was a 4th year film major who had only had a few upper division classes left to complete this semester. So, he had to find some way to occupy his time (and be sure he had enough units to remain a full-time student). And that's how our paths became intertwined.

I distinctly remember the first day of class. I had gotten there about twenty minutes early, as it was my first class on my first day of college. I couldn't help but feel excited about this new chapter of my life that was just beginning, and I was so used to getting up early back in high school where we had to be ready to learn at seven o'clock every fucking day. So there I was, on the third floor of the north liberal arts building in room 328, waiting to begin my life as a college student. Just as the professor was about to begin taking roll, the door burst open and all of the students (myself included) whipped their heads around to see someone stumble into the room out of breath. As the mysterious intruder looked up, I was amazed by his bright green eyes; they were almost catlike. And by those crazy tattoos underneath them, holy FUCK that must've hurt! The next craziest thing had to be the guy's hair, it was bright red, like SERIOUSLY red. There was no way that color could be natural. And he styled it so unusually, but it seemed to fit with his personality. His hair was pushed back from his face, but it was in long, unruly spikes. It kinda looked like the guys' head was on fire.

The professor simply raised an eyebrow. It seemed she had been unfazed by this entire experience. "That was quite an entrance," was all she stated before looking down to the sheet of paper in her hands.

As if he had not just dashed into the classroom panting and looking as if he had woken up five minutes ago, the newcomer straightened up and ran a hand through his hair as he smiled at her and replied, "First impressions are the ones that count, right?"

"I doubt you impressed anyone running in here like a lunatic. Now please, take a seat so I can begin," our persnickety professor stated curtly.

The green-eyed man simply smirked and shrugged as he shuffled forward. He walked past my desk and glanced down at me. It was only then that I realized that I'd been staring at him this entire time. Embarrassed, I looked away, but I could feel a blush creeping onto my cheeks. Even though I wasn't looking directly at him anymore, I could swear that he smirked at me; a _knowing_ smirk that just seemed to irk me that much more. And of _course_ he would take the desk right next to mine even though there were dozens of empty seats all around. What happened to the unspoken rule that you sit at least one seat away from someone unless you know them? Well, that's how the rest of my classes seemed to function (as I would later discover). Now I was going to be subjected to this torture, this incredibly _hot_ torture for an entire semester.

After the first day of formalities which included roll (the only time the entire semester that our professor actually cared that we were there), the course description, and a basic outline for the rest of the semester, the class turned out to be very enjoyable. We had a lot of days in which we would simply work on questions regarding whatever book we had been reading at the time, and most everyone who actually went to class would usually just work with their friends to make things easier.

The first time we had one of these days we had just read _Chronicles of a Death Foretold_ and had been given about twenty-five questions asking us to analyze certain things that took place during the story. I had planned to just work on the assignment myself, as I usually got more done that way, and none of my friends were in this class with me. My twin brother Sora was an art major, and therefore had his days filled with classes for painting and sketching models for hours. We were close, but we didn't feel the need to organize our schedules together. We both had the attitude that we'd pretty much just do what we want, and if the situation arises that we can hang together then cool. Sora was rooming with Riku, his best friend-turned boyfriend. I was constantly thankful that my room wasn't anywhere near theirs. My roommate was a friend of mine from high school named Hayner. He was alright. I wouldn't consider him my best friend, but then again I didn't really consider anyone my best friend. I mean, I had a lot of good friends, but there wasn't one that stuck out more than the others. Sora was probably the most important person in my life; I mean we're twins for crying out loud. We're both just so in tune with each other, it would seem wrong for me to put anyone else on that level.

Anyway, so I was just sitting there, minding my own business and scribbling notes in the margins of my copy of _Chronicles of a Death Foretold_ when I was shaken from my reverie by the sound of a desk scraping across the linoleum floor. The red-haired, green-eyed guy from the first day had dragged his desk in front mine so that they were now pressed together, facing each other. I looked up to see him smiling at me.

"Hi," was all he said, a wide grin spreading onto his face.

"Hi," I replied, sounding disinterested. It's not like I wasn't interested, I mean this guy was HOT, but when I'm working I really just don't appreciate other people inside my bubble, no matter now mouth-wateringly attractive they may be.

"Axel," he stated as he held out his hand for a handshake.

Returning the gesture, rather awkwardly, I replied, "Roxas" and went back to taking notes.

"Roxas, huh? Now there's a name I haven't heard before," he stated thoughtfully. I had to admit, this guy's voice was even somewhat sexy. It was almost like a purr, making me think of a cat once again. I don't know how the hell I managed to get this guy's attention, but I was thankful for it regardless.

"My parents wanted to be different I guess, which doesn't really make sense when you consider the fact that my brother's name is Sora."

"You have a brother? So is he as cute as you?"

I stopped. Did he just call me cute? I knew for a fact that my cheeks had turned scarlet.

"Aww Roxie you're even cuter when you blush!" Axel exclaimed delightedly.

Was this guy for real? "Roxie?" I asked. I've known this guy for five seconds and he's already given me a horrible nickname that I knew would stick. "Did you just come over here to hit on me?" I asked, my frustration overtaking my attraction.

"Kind of. I also wanted to know if you wanted to do this shit together," he replied. This guy was something else. He could switch gears from being flirty to normal without ever seeming as if anything had changed. Was he that good, or was that just how he was all the time?

"Uh sure, I guess," I replied. I'm horrible at making new friends, everyone just assumes I'm disinterested or weird. I'm just not good at opening up to people until I've gotten to know them a little better and see how they tick. Of course Axel is so forward that this was a wall that he pretty much shattered when he opened his mouth to speak to me.

"Perfect! Now tell me what the fuck she means when she wants us to explain..."

And that's how we met. Every Monday and Wednesday of the fall semester I would see him and he would wave and say, "Hey Roxas!" and we would spend the period talking, or occasionally doing work. He told me about his friends and the crazy shit they did and I just listened and laughed. He would ask me about my friends and I'd tell him, but I'd always feel slightly inadequate. Axel's life sounded so much more interesting than mine, and I felt that my stories paled in comparison to the ridiculous situations that he and his friends found themselves in constantly, like when his friend Demyx suggested they sneak into the school's pool at three o'clock in the morning to go skinny dipping after having a little too much booze. Basically the two of them had done it, but the campus security had heard a commotion and come over to investigate. Suddenly the lights in the pool had turned on and Demyx and Axel had leapt out of the pool and frantically searched for somewhere to hide. Axel had managed to squeeze into the space between a vending machine and the wall, while Demyx dove into a pile of Styrofoam weights for an aqua aerobics class, just before the security guard entered the pool area. He looked around and assumed he had been hearing things, until he found their discarded clothes by the side of the pool. He walked over and picked them up questioningly, and then turned around and left. After a few minutes, the two of them came out of their hiding places and stared at each other before bursting into laughter. So the two of them hopped into Demyx's car, stark naked, and drove to their apartment.

I never did crazy shit like that, but still it was so… _thrilling_. Although he would ask questions about me, or my friends, or my family, I always felt as if I was boring him. He was probably feigning enthusiasm when I talked about going to the beach with my friends over summer, or when I talked about Sora, or my parents, or anything about myself. I couldn't see how this guy, this _senior_ who was amazingly good-looking, and funny, and interesting could be interested in someone so average and dull as yours truly.

And he was always flirting with me, or making some sort of sexual comment. I couldn't tell if he was really gay, or if he was just messing with me. I'd explain some literary concept to him and he'd reply with something like, "Sorry babe can you repeat that? I was too busy thinking about how beautiful your eyes look today" or "Roxas you gotta get out more often. Let's hang out this weekend, I'll show you a good time." I always laughed and shrugged off his come-ons, assuming that it was just something he did. Still, I enjoyed the attention.

It was after a while that I realized that I _really_ liked Axel. I mean, more than just feeling slightly flattered whenever he flirted with me. I found myself daydreaming about him, wondering what it would feel like if he held me, if he kissed me… and then I'd blush profusely and Axel would make some comment about how I must be thinking dirty thoughts and I should tell him what they were so that he could help.

He would constantly ask if there were any girls I liked. He'd say "C'mon Roxas, I bet chicks would DIE to go out with a stud like you!" and I would just conveniently avoid the subject. I was still having difficulty with my sexuality. For years I had felt like something was wrong with me. I never was as enthusiastic about girls as the rest of my friends; I always just considered them friends. When we all started going through puberty I would just pretend to be interested when the guys would talk about sex with girls, or seeing them naked, or whatever. It was the stories they had about themselves that always made me feel excited. I found myself getting nervous during gym when there were tons of guys in one room that were naked, or changing, or something. I constantly found myself having to hurriedly remove myself before it became obvious that the situation was making me… aroused.

It's not that I was afraid to tell Axel that I thought I might be gay, okay well maybe I was. I just didn't want to ruin what we had. What a killjoy if I were to tell him that I liked guys and he would begin to treat me different. He'd feel uncomfortable around me, slowly distancing himself until the point where the two of us could pass each other on the street and he wouldn't even bat an eyelid. But this was just my imagination getting the best of me again.

Despite the exciting prospect of new classes and a month off from school, I was truly sad to go when the last day of my world literature class came. As we exited the class after our ridiculously easy final Axel turned to me and said, "Well, I guess I'll see you around Roxas. Enjoy your break alright, but not too much, unless you tell me about it later." And with a wink he was gone. Gone from my life. I felt lonely and empty, which was stupid because I had only talked to this guy for an hour twice a week.

The best two hours of my entire week usually.

Ugh. I can't believe I let myself get caught up on some guy that I barely even know. It's not like we hung out outside of class or anything.

Although he offered, I just never took him up on it.

I was suddenly beginning to regret never taking the time to seeing him outside of class. I always just assumed he was joking, but maybe if I would've said okay then we would've gotten somewhere. Now I'd probably never see him again.

If only I were that lucky.

"Soooo Roxas, how've you been?" Axel stated, bringing me back into the present. That wicked grin was still etched onto his face.

"Umm. Good?" was all I could manage to get out of my mouth.

"Good, huh? Let's grab a coffee and catch up, shall we? I'm curious as to just how _good_ you've been feeling lately," he replied, making an obvious gesture to the room that we were in.

"O-okay," I managed to stutter out. My face must've been nearly as red as his hair by now.

"Good, good. Let's go, Roxie," he purred as he slung an arm over my shoulders and walked me out the door.

What have I gotten myself into?


	2. Chapter 2

Author's Note: Welcome to Chapter 2! This is my first time writing on this site, and I'm really quite enjoying myself. I think it's funny how this chapter ended up being slightly longer than Chapter 1, simply because I had intended to cut it off much earlier than when I did. Nevertheless, I hope that you enjoy reading it. Thanks!

Disclaimer: I do not own Kingdom Hearts (unfortunately) or any of the other things mentioned in this story etc. etc. etc.

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Axel's face was spread into a wide grin as the two of us walked silently down the street. His arm was still slung over my shoulder ever so casually, as if he didn't realize that even the slightest contact we made would cause my heart rate to speed up. People glanced at us as we walked past them and it only made me blush deeper.

They probably think that we're a couple or something.

This thought made my heart leap for a moment before I hammered the feeling back down into my chest with excuse after rational excuse.

He was always like this, remember? This doesn't mean anything.

I had almost completely forgotten about the embarrassing predicament he had found me in until he opened his mouth and said, "Hope I didn't keep you from buying anything Roxas, because I would be thoroughly disappointed if that were the case."

A deep blush quickly overtook my cheeks as I could feel my face heating up. I wanted nothing more than to bury my face in my hands and pretend this had never happened.

Why the fuck had I walked in there? Ugh.

At my lack of a response he turned his head to look down at me with a curious expression. "Aww, my Roxie's blushing!" he exclaimed delightedly. "God how I missed that," he trailed off.

Wait, had he just said he missed me? No you idiot, he just missed you blushing; but isn't that the same thing? Unless he means he missed embarrassing me. Ass.

I was woken from my internal argument with myself when we were standing in front of Starbucks. When had we crossed the street? Oh well.

Axel opened the door for me and we both walked in. I absolutely love the smell of coffee, and stepping inside certainly lightened my mood. Even the atmosphere of coffee shops was something that I adored. People were sitting and reading newspapers or chatting with friends. One man was clicking away at the keys on his laptop. I wondered what he was doing. Maybe he was writing a story, or perhaps he was cranking out a paper for a class he was taking. I loved taking my computer to the coffee shop on-campus and sit there for hours working on pieces for my creative writing class. Yep, coffee shops were always something that made me happy, even if I happened to be there with an incredibly hot man who had just caught me perusing a sex shop.

I hadn't realized it was our turn to order. C'mon Roxas, come back to reality.

"Yeah I'll have a grande caramel macchiato and… what do you want sweet thing?" Axel said. I looked up and realized he was referring to me. The barista looked at me with a delighted expression, obviously entertained by the pet name Axel had openly used.

"Huh? Oh I'll have a tall white chocolate mocha," I quickly replied. I fumbled through my pockets trying to find my wallet, but Axel placed his hand on my shoulder.

"I've got it, don't worry," was all he said before he turned back to the barista and handed her a twenty.

"Are you sure?" I asked. I felt obligated to pull my own weight, I mean it's not like I can't afford my own coffee.

"Yeah it's not a problem, I was the one who suggested we come here," he replied matter-of-factly. And that was that.

So wait… since he was paying for me, does that make this a date? My heart started beating faster again. Once more my rationality had to beat my excitement down.

Friends go out for coffee all the time, and it makes sense that he'd offer to pay since he was the one who sprung the idea on you in the first place. Don't assume this is anything special; it's all just a coincidence.

A horrible coincidence. Ugh. Why was I always so fucking unlucky? Maybe Sora was right when he said it was because my favorite number is thirteen. No that's stupid; Sora's just making up shit.

I hadn't realized that Axel hadn't said anything this entire time. Sure, I was having a long and detailed conversation with myself inside my head, but to any innocent bystander it just looked like we were standing next to each other saying absolutely nothing. Then again, I wasn't sure I wanted to initiate conversation after I had been discovered under such… uncomfortable circumstances.

Our drinks appeared on the counter and we shuffled over to pick them up. I felt a hand on the small of my back as Axel directed me towards a small table in the back of the shop. I sat down awkwardly, not at all looking forward to the conversation that was sure to ensue now that we were sitting down with our drinks. I watched him plop down into the seat across from me as he brought his drink up to his mouth to take a sip, never allowing his eyes to leave my face. I looked down, slightly embarrassed.

"Sooooo…. Roxas. Tell me how you've been lately! I mean, it's been _months_ since we've seen each other. Did you miss me?" he asked jokingly. He smiled that incredibly sexy smirk that I hadn't realized I'd missed so much.

Yes I had missed him a lot. More than someone should miss a person they knew for three or four months. More than he needed to know. "I dunno same old boring thing for me you know? What about you? I'm sure you've got tons more interesting stories than I have."

"Oh I don't know about that Roxie. I want to hear the story about why you were over in Blush just a few moments ago. That sounds interesting," he purred. Damn that smirk of his, making my cheeks flush.

"Uhh well, um. That was-" was all I managed to get out before I was miraculously saved by my twin brother who happened to be in the right place at the right time for once in his life.

"Roxas! Hey! What are you doing here?" Sora exclaimed from his spot in line. I had never been so happy to see my brother in my entire life. He was waving excitedly, spiky brown hair bouncing in his enthusiasm. And sure enough, there was Riku standing just to the right of Sora. The two of them were nearly inseparable nowadays. Riku simply raised his hand in acknowledgement. I waved at the two of them, wondering if the relief was as apparent in my eyes as I thought it must be.

"Your brother?" I heard Axel say, causing me to remember his presence. I turned back to face him and nodded. "And his boyfriend I'm assuming? It was Riku, right?"

"Yeah!" I exclaimed. I was pleasantly surprised that he could remember Riku's name. Maybe he was actually taking in what I said during our frequent talks during class last semester.

Before long Sora and Riku had gotten their drinks and walked over to join us. They grabbed a few stray chairs and crowded around our tiny table.

"Roxas, who's your friend?" Sora asked excitedly. He loved meeting new people.

Axel held out his hand, a similar gesture to the first time that we met. "Axel. A-X-E-L, got it memorized?"

"Sure do! I'm Sora, and this is Riku," Sora replied, pointing to the older boy sitting next to him. Riku simply nodded. He didn't talk too much, especially when compared to Sora. I still had trouble wrapping my mind around how the hell those two ended up together.

"Ah yes, I've heard about you both from Roxie here. It's nice to finally meet you," Axel replied with a dazzling smile, y'know the kind that you'd use to win over your girlfriend's mother or some shit like that.

Riku snorted. "Roxie?"

I pouted. "It's a stupid nickname that he won't quit using. I don't like it," I replied defensively.

"Aww but it fits you because you're so cute, Roxas!" Axel exclaimed, ruffling my hair as he spoke. Shit, does he have any idea how long it takes me to make it look good every morning?

I didn't miss the raised eyebrows coming from both my brother and his boyfriend as I failed miserably at trying to fix my hair. Sora's face was almost completely covered with a suggestive smirk.

"So… what brings the two of you here today then? Out on a date?"

I glared at him, but he simply kept smiling. Sora probably thought he was onto something, the secret affairs of his mysterious twin. Seriously though, I'd never keep something like a relationship as a secret from him so I don't know why he thought he had discovered some huge scandal.

"Well no, we actually met on accident when I ran into Roxas in- FUCK!" Axel screamed as I kicked his leg. Hard. There was no way I was going to let another soul know that I had been in that store.

"We ran into each other in the candy shop," I said as I turned to Sora, completely ignoring Axel who was still swearing profusely.

Sora's eyes lit up. "Oh, I love that place! The one with the ice cream counter, right? Oh Riku, can we go there after please?"

I couldn't help but chuckle. I knew that would get his mind off of what Axel had been about to say. Sora was such a little kid sometimes, but it was part of what made him so lovable.

"Sora, you just got a hot chocolate. Are you sure you want to go get candy and ice cream after that?" Riku asked with a concerned expression. Anyone who knew Sora well knew that he definitely didn't need that much sugar in his system. A dangerous outcome would surely result.

"Aww c'mon Riku, pleeeeease?" Sora whined as he gave his boyfriend the best puppy dog eyes he could muster. I knew Riku would never be able to stand up to that, and sure enough he caved.

"Fine," he surrendered, but smiled when Sora wrapped his arms around him affectionately. The two of them really did look good together I decided.

"Let's go now! Bye Roxas! It was nice meeting you Axel!" Sora shouted back as he dragged Riku out of the shop. Riku barely had time to wave as he was trying to keep up with his overly excited boyfriend.

"Same to you, kid!" Axel, now recovered, replied with a wave. And now we were alone again. Reluctantly, I looked at Axel. He frowned at me, and I felt my heart sink a little bit.

"Man that really hurt Roxas! You didn't have to kick me so hard!" he scolded. I really did feel guilty. I didn't mean to hurt him; I was just embarrassed that he'd reveal my secret. I felt guilty. I mean seriously, I had just brutally assaulted someone that I was extremely attracted to. That probably didn't help my chance with him at all. I slumped my shoulders and looked at the ground.

Axel sighed. "C'mon Roxas, cheer up. I'll forgive you if you stop looking so sad, promise."

I looked up quickly, excited that he wasn't too mad at me. "Okay!" I said excitedly, not even trying to hide my grin.

He grinned back. Damn he was hot. "Although, you'll still have to make it up to me. That wasn't very nice Roxie,"

Fuck, he was still going to hold it against me. The idea of being blackmailed was tying a knot in my stomach.

"Axel I'll do anything, just please don't tell anyone that you caught me in that store," I groaned.

Axel burst out laughing. I was taken aback by how beautiful his laugh sounded. It was so pure and genuinely happy, not like those fake laughs I had heard myself churn out whenever I was hanging out with some of my other friends. Axel was so… real.

"So the culprit admits his crime! Ha ha ha! Well, well Roxie I'll certainly hold you to your bargain there. Though I must say, you might regret it," he added with an evil (and sexy) smirk. "You can be sure that I won't forget that you said a-ny-thing," he said, stretching the last word into three separated syllables.

I sighed, only somewhat relieved, and leaned back into my chair as I took a sip of my drink. I had ensured that no one else would find out about my risqué escapade, but now I would have to worry about whatever ideas Axel was formulating in his mind. I had no clue what this guy would want from me, I mean, it's not like we knew each other that well or anything.

Axel held out his hand. I looked at it questioningly. What did he expect me to do with his hand? Hold it? Before I could act however, "Let me see your phone."

It took me a moment to process that he wanted me to put my phone in his hand. After a second or two I began rummaging through my pockets until I found my cell phone buried deep inside my front right pocket. I placed the small black phone in his hands and he looked it over critically.

"Nice phone. A Verizon LG right?" he asked before opening it. I couldn't tell what he was doing as he punched buttons and stared at the tiny little screen. Finally, he shut it and handed it back to me with a smile. "Now you have my number Roxas, let me have yours."

My number? As in my phone number? Did this extremely hot guy seriously just ask me for my phone number? I stared at him dumbfounded for a moment or two before I realized we had been sitting in silence for quite some time now and Axel was just staring at me with a raised eyebrow. I quickly stuttered out my phone number in an attempt to avoid embarrassing myself further. Axel's nimble fingers typed it into the phone nearly as fast as I had said it to him. He pressed a few more buttons before holding the phone up in front of is face. I looked at him questioningly before I heard a click. I blinked. Did he just take my picture? Sure enough, Axel turned his phone around to show me the screen and there I was, staring at him like an idiot. Ugh. Talk about not being photogenic.

"Ugh. I look awful," I answered in disgust.

Axel chuckled. "I think you look quite cute babe, but then again, I always think that." As he said this he looked up and winked at me. I couldn't stop myself from blushing again. God, I am such a girl sometimes.

"Th-thanks," I managed to mumble. I peered up at him from under my eyelashes and he seemed pleased.

We sat there for a moment before I decided to break the silence. "So, how's your semester been?"

"Not bad. Just finishing up y'know? Actually it's been kind of boring. I mean sure, I hang out with my friends and stuff, but I'm just so tired of the same old routine y'know? I feel like life's not as exciting as it used to be."

"Yeah I can kind of understand that," I replied. That's kind of how I felt this semester. Sometimes I thought that I could probably have a robot go through the same motions that I do everyday and no one would be able to tell the difference. I've just gotten so lost in my routine lately that I felt like I needed something to remind me that I was alive.

"But I sure had a lot of fun last semester in that world literature class with you!" he added with a smile.

Was he serious? How could Axel; amazing, sexy, popular, fun, interesting Axel possibly have any fun sitting in a stuffy classroom for an hour with a boring kid who hadn't done anything interesting in his entire life?

"Yeah me too," I replied with a smile. Even if it was a lie, I was flattered that he would even say something like that to me.

Axel tilted his head back in an attempt to get the last few drops of coffee out of his cup. My gaze was glued to the undulations in his long, muscular neck as he swallowed what was left of his drink. I gulped. Could I go at least five minutes without ogling this guy? Ugh.

With a satisfied sigh, Axel set his cup on the table and locked eyes with me. "So Roxas, what do you say we blow this popsicle joint?"

I laughed. What a dork. "Sure thing," I replied as I got up from my seat and headed to the trash can to throw my empty cup away. "What did you have in mind?"

He scratched his head thoughtfully for a second. "Well, I took the bus here so I was hoping maybe you could give me a ride back to my place. You do owe me after all," he added with a wink.

I had almost forgot about that. Dang. "No problem," I replied.

Axel smiled. "I'm so glad I ran into you today, Roxas! I thought I'd never see you again after last semester!" he happily stated as we left the Starbucks. The barista who had taken our order wished us well and Axel waved to her before slinging his arm over my shoulder again.

I smiled to myself. Not only had he just said that he was happy to see me, he had his arm around me again. We were forced to walk closer together as we headed down the sidewalk towards my car and our hips kept bumping into each other. However brief the contact; I still felt my heart flutter every time we touched.

We finally reached my car, a white Toyota Camry. It wasn't anything extravagant, but it was still my car. My parents had gotten it used for my sixteenth birthday and I absolutely loved having a car. I unlocked it with my remote and Axel walked over to the passenger side. After we'd both buckled our seatbelts, I'd locked the doors, and no one was behind me, I proceeded to back out of the spot I had snagged on one of the side streets where we had been walking. Everything in this part of town was parallel parking, so you had to be good at it in order to survive.

The stereo kicked on and Anberlin resonated through the speakers at an earsplitting volume. I quickly turned the knob down, embarrassed.

"Wow Roxas, I hope my hearing wasn't permanently damaged," Axel said as he tenderly touched his ears, stressing the point.

"Sorry!" I said, genuinely remorseful. I couldn't help that I loved having my music blaring when I drove by myself. Just being surrounded by it all in this enclosed space was exhilarating, or when I would roll down the window on the nice days and share my music with the world. Sometimes I'd even decide to sing along.

Axel shrugged and reached under his seat. I glanced at him, wondering what he was doing until he slowly began reclining and I realized he was just adjusting the seat. After he had tilted it back so far that he was almost lying down, he put his arms behind his head and closed his eyes. For a moment I thought he was going to fall asleep, but then I heard him softly singing along with the music.

_And we're driving just as fast as we can, and we're racing to outrun the wind. It's just me and you and you and me so wild and so young, bright-eyed and free…_

"You listen to Anberlin?!" I asked excitedly.

He opened his eyes and smiled that lopsided smile, obviously amused by my sudden outburst. "Yeah, they're not bad," was all he said before closing his eyes again.

"Not bad? I love them," I responded as I changed lanes to pass a ridiculously slow old lady.

"You're gonna wanna turn left here," Axel stated as we came upon the next signal. Checking my mirrors, I flipped on my turn signal and moved into the left turn lane. While we sat through an entire light cycle I noticed that Axel was now staring out the window.

"What are you thinking about?" I asked without meaning to. Did I really say that out loud?

He turned to me and smiled. "You wouldn't believe me even if I told you."

What did that mean? Why had I even asked him that? He probably thinks I'm really weird and nosy now.

We continued down the next street for a couple of minutes before coming across a small apartment complex that Axel said was his. He lived with his friend Demyx, you know, the one he had gone skinny dipping with (along with many other ridiculous things). Demyx was a music major at their school, meaning he spent most of his day at the music campus, which was the farthest building from pretty much everything.

I pulled up in front of what looked like the main gate and put the car in park. I looked over at Axel; he looked like he was thinking about something really hard.

"So, gimme a call or a text sometime alright?" I said, snapping him out of his reverie. He looked over at me and smiled.

"Sure thing. Listen Roxas, I was wondering if you'd want to come to a party that a friend of mine is having this Thursday," Axel asked nervously.

I thought about it for a while. I probably shouldn't, I mean, I barely know him and I won't know any of his friends and it'll just be weird. I was just about to reply when a little voice in my head reminded me that this was how it went every time he had asked me to do something last semester. I had always turned him down, but afterwards I would regret not making an effort to get to know him better. Maybe there was a reason that the two of us had met up again, even if the situation was one I'd prefer to forget. Maybe this was life giving me a second chance.

After a few long seconds I turned to him and replied, "Sure Axel. Where's it gonna be?"

I swear he looked like I had just told him he'd won the lottery. Axel's eyes lit up and his smile was spread from ear to ear. "Oh you will? Oh that's great! I mean, I didn't think you'd actually say yes! Don't worry, I'll give you the details and shit later. Demyx can drive us there, I'm sure he won't mind. He loves me. Ha ha. I'm so happy you want to come Roxas, you have no idea!"

I smiled. His happiness was contagious. "Okay, just talk to me during the week and we'll figure something out alright?"

He nodded excitedly. "You bet I will!"

As Axel got out of the car he was still grinning enormously as he seemed to be staring at something off in the distance. He closed the door behind him and I waved through the window as he began to walk towards the gate.

Before driving home, I just sat there cherishing the moment. Axel had just asked me to hang out, and I had said yes! I couldn't believe myself, and he had seemed so happy about it too! I was so caught up in my happy moment that it took me a while to notice that Axel was standing outside of my window. Startled, I opened the door and swung my legs to the left and let them dangle out of the car so that I could face him.

"Forget something?" I asked curiously. Had Axel even been holding anything? I couldn't remember him carrying a bag or anything.

"Yeah…" he muttered. I looked up at him questioningly as he stared down at me.

Suddenly, he was leaning closer until his face was only inches away from mine. I froze when I saw those bright green eyes completely engulfing my vision. Then he closed the distance between us and caught my lips in a warm kiss.

I think my heart stopped. Axel. Is. KISSING. Me.

And just as soon as it had started, it was over. He pulled away and looked at me with a shy, but accomplished expression. "Like I said, you're cute when you blush Roxas. See you Thursday!"

And with a wave he was walking back towards the apartments again. I sat there, stunned. I checked my face my rear-view mirror and sure enough, my cheeks were colored a bright shade of pink. I gingerly brought my fingers up to touch my lips. I could still remember how soft Axel's lips had felt against mine, and he had smelled so good! Like a mixture of cinnamon and cigarette smoke, and something else. Something distinctly Axel.

I could feel a large grin spreading across my features. Smiling, I put the car in drive and pulled away from the curb. I couldn't wait until Thursday. It looked like my life just might be getting a little more interesting.


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I do not own Kingdom Hearts (although I do have the game right here in front of me) or any of the other copyrighted things mentioned in this story. You get the picture.

Author's Note: Welcome to chapter three! Thanks everyone for their lovely reviews and such, I really do appreciate what you all have to say. Seriously it just brightens my day when I see that someone has enjoyed my story. I hope that you guys continue to enjoy my work, as there is much more to come; I promise. :)

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I knew that I was grinning like an idiot when I got back to my dorm, but I was just a little too high on life to care. It was as if the embarrassing events of this morning hadn't even happened. Everything had somehow turned around after that kiss… wait, was I seriously blushing again? Ugh, I am such a girl sometimes.

I slid my key into the lock and opened the door. It was still pretty early to head down to the dining hall for dinner so I decided that I'd just hang out in my room for a while, maybe listen to some music or catch up on my creative writing homework. I plopped down on my bed and stretched out across it, sighing contentedly.

Hayner was sitting on the bed across from me, headphones securely in place. He seemed to be typing away at something on his computer, no doubt for his business class. I still couldn't figure out how the hell Hayner had ended up a business major. It was almost comical to imagine my friend, usually clad in camouflage pants and a black wife-beater wearing a suit and tie instead. I laughed to myself; I was in such a good mood today. Hayner seemed to have noticed my joyful attitude and pulled his headphones off of his ears, allowing them to rest around his neck. He looked at me with an eyebrow raised.

"Well aren't we just a little ray of fucking sunshine today? What the hell happened to you?"

What happened to me? I should be the one asking him that from the sound of his attitude. I wasn't about to let his PMS ruin my mood though. I simply glanced over at him with a lazy smile and responded sarcastically, "Hi Hayner, it's nice to see you too."

Hayner folded his arms in front of his chest with a huff. I groaned internally as I prepared myself for a rant about whatever had pissed him off today. "I don't know what's so nice about today; at least you don't have some egotistical dickweed breathing down your neck constantly. It must be nice. Ugh, I swear if that Seifer guy calls me 'fag' one more time I'm gonna-"

I stared at him, expecting him to say what he was "gonna" do, but apparently he had just meant for the silence to serve as an intimidating omen for what was to come. I laughed. Hayner was all talk, as usual. I knew him too well. I knew he really just didn't know what to do, so as usual he would just rant to me about it and talk about how this guy didn't know who he was messing with and how he'd get his soon enough. Hayner had some serious anger issues sometimes, but whenever I mentioned that to him he'd usually just yell at me. I'd learned to pretty much just keep my opinions to myself when it came to my friend Hayner.

I sighed and turned my head back to look up at the ceiling. "All I ever hear you talk about anymore is this guy," I remarked offhandedly, closing my eyes for a moment's rest.

"Well he won't fucking leave me alone! I swear it's like he follows me, just so he can insult me or laugh at me whenever I do _anything_! I don't see him traumatizing anyone else, just me! The fucker doesn't know who he's dealing with here," Hayner replied with a pout, face slightly red from anger and embarrassment.

And then it was as if a piece of the puzzle had just snapped into place. My eyes popped open and I turned my head over to look at him, amazed with the new revelation that had just occurred to me.

"Dude, you totally want his cock."

Hayner's eyes bugged out and he began to open and close his mouth without a sound, making himself look like a goldfish I decided.

"W-what the fuck are you talking about? I never-! That is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard Roxas! Are you out of your mind?" Hayner stuttered out as his blush grew deeper.

"Don't worry, from the sound of things I bet he totally wants you too."

I smirked as I watched his expression grow even more intense than it had previously. Got him. Hayner's eyes grew so wide that I was surprised they didn't just pop right out of his head. He was utterly speechless. I was about to test my theory further and see how much redder I could make my roommate's face when the door was flung open and an angry redhead stormed into our room.

"Ugh, Sora and Riku are at it AGAIN!" the utterly pissed off girl exclaimed as she stomped in and sat down angrily on Hayner's bed.

Poor Kairi, she had the room directly underneath my brother's room, and was therefore subjected to the torment of hearing all of the banging, screaming, moaning, and every other god-awful noise that Sora and Riku seemed to make when they were having sex (which was almost constantly). She would frequently storm angrily into our room, or Olette's room, complaining about the noise coming from upstairs and how she was probably scarred beyond the help of therapy by now.

"This is all just disturbing beyond belief. I know they've been together for a long time, but they were my fucking best friends when we were kids. It is so wrong on so many levels for me to have to experience this. I swear I am going to kill them. I will never be able to rid myself of the awful memories of what I've heard them doing up there. I need like, mind bleach…"

I laughed. "Sorry Kai, I know it's rough." And boy did I. I had to live with their loud sexual escapades back in high school when Sora's room was directly across the hall from mine. I did not envy Kairi's situation in the slightest, but I certainly could take pity on her as a fellow victim of mental scarring.

"Yeah, but you know you can come hang out in here whenever you want," Hayner added as he slipped an arm around her shoulder, pulling her closer.

Kairi looked at Hayner's hand, and then at me. She looked at Hayner again with an expression that I could only describe as the way in which one would look at an alien creature that had just landed in front of them, or pretty much just anything that they never imagined they'd witness in their entire life. "What the fuck is up with him?" She asked me incredulously as she pointed an accusatory finger at the man sitting next to her, slowly trying to inch away from him as he was thoroughly creeping her out now.

I chuckled. "He's trying to convince himself he's straight," I responded nonchalantly, finding a particularly interesting pattern of cracks on the ceiling. I decided they looked like a lumpy star, or maybe a piece of toast (not bread, definitely toast).

"Roxas!" Hayner yelled angrily, face burning up again. Kairi just laughed.

"Well it's about time you came out of the closet, Hayner. Who's the lucky guy?" she asked with a playful poke in his side.

Hayner scooted away from her, now wanting nothing to do with this overly curious woman who was throwing empty accusations and assumptions at him.

"Some dude named Seifer," I added, receiving another even angrier glare from my roommate. If looks could kill, well, let's just say I'm certainly glad they don't after a leer like that.

"Well I have to approve of any and all boyfriends, so make sure you bring him around sometime; but _please_ don't invite me if you're going to be screwing each other's brains out." Kairi stated matter-of-factly. I rolled my eyes. Kairi was so mother-henish sometimes. Maybe it's just something that comes with having a bunch of male friends who are gay. She just wanted us all to have boyfriends who would be good to us (she herself was the self-proclaimed judge of who was good and who wasn't), as she would be with any and all of her girl friends as well. Still, sometimes it was so… overbearing. I felt a little sorry for bringing this upon Hayner as I knew that Kairi had just begun drilling him.

If it was possible, Hayner's face had turned a darker shade of red than before. He furiously fumbled through his pockets and finally found what he had been looking for: a pack of cigarettes. "I'm going out for a smoke, I'll see you lamers later," he spat out before getting up off of the bed to storm out of the room.

Right before he exited our room, the door opened and in walked Sora. I felt somewhat nauseous as I mentally took notice that he had that "freshly fucked" look; hair ruffled, lips bruised, clothes somewhat wrinkled. That was just not something one wants to imagine when looking at their twin brother.

"Hey Hayner," Sora said with a cheerful wave. Hayner grunted in reply and ended up roughly bumping into Sora as he frantically made his escape. Sora winced and rubbed his right shoulder.

"What's up with him?" Sora asked us curiously, slightly offended by the behavior exhibited by his blonde friend.

"Dunno, just struggling with the fact that he might be gay I guess," I answered, growing tired of repeating myself. Seriously, I didn't see what the big deal was. I mean sure, I liked to tease him about it, but that was just because I knew it made him uncomfortable. I was way beyond the point of having any problems with homosexuality. That was a demon I had conquered a long time ago, thankfully.

Sora's eyes widened. "Seriously? Wow I had no idea," he stated thoughtfully. One of the endearing traits about Sora was how little he was able to pick up from the people around him. It took him years to realize that Riku had developed feelings from him, and when he did he had acted so awkward that I was terrified that their relationship would never come to fruition. That is one instance in which I'm very glad that I was proven wrong. Those two are a match made in heaven.

Kairi laughed, "Sora you are so oblivious sometimes. It's cute. I almost forgot that I'm mad at you," she added with a bitter grin.

Sora rushed to her side, "Mad? Oh no Kairi, what did I do? I'm so sorry!" he exclaimed, eyes pleading for an explanation. It was strikingly obvious that he seriously had no clue what he had done to make his other best friend upset with him. I could imagine the little gears turning in his head, playing back recent events in hopes of discovering an instance in which he had done something that would possibly make Kairi upset.

"How many times have I told you and Riku that I do not care for a detailed narration of what the two of you are doing up there?" she spat with an exasperated sigh at the end. This was something I'm sure she'd repeated numerous times before; hell, _I _had repeated something similar to the two of them more times than I could count. There was just no stopping those two; they were like… horny bunnies. Yeah that's about right.

"Yeah Sora, you don't have to scream so much. Riku can't be that good." I teased.

"Care to find out?" came a voice from the doorway. Speak of the devil; here came the silver-haired sex fiend himself, a confident smirk playing across his features as he winked at me playfully. I laughed, knowing that Riku wasn't actually serious; he just liked pressing Sora's buttons (much like yours truly). It was a common interest that the two of us shared.

"Not in a million years," Sora retorted possessively, glaring at me before running over to Riku and wrapping his arms around his waist possessively.

"Kidding, kidding," I said as I raised my hands in surrender. "You know I have no interest in your boyfriend, Sora."

"Oh I know baby brother," Sora replied with a Cheshire cat grin. I scowled. Okay so he was a minute older than me, big deal. "Riku and I are fully aware that you have someone else who has captured your _special_ attention."

Fucking Sora, he just couldn't keep anything to himself. Of course he's always like that, telling a Sora a secret is pretty much the same thing as just telling all of our friends. I mean, I knew he'd be serious if I asked him to, but he didn't seem to think that his encounter with Axel and me was a secret that needed to be kept.

Kairi's eyes lit up as she now turned her attention to me. "Roxas you have a boy?! Why didn't you tell me?" Kairi blurted out excitedly. She immediately leapt off of Hayner's bed and was sitting cross-legged next to me in a flash. I scooted closer to the wall, slightly uncomfortable from the close proximity between me and the girl with the crazy grin.

"He's just a _friend_ that I got coffee with today. Leave it to Sora to jump to conclusions," I remarked defensively, knowing that the blush creeping across my cheeks was enough to give me away. Fuck.

And Kairi didn't buy it. Well, shit.

"Ooh, he must be good if he got _your_ attention Roxas! We all know how picky you are," Kairi said with a quick laugh, as if she new everything about me.

"So what if I'm picky? It's better than just agreeing to every guy that wants in my pants," I retorted. I had no problem with being selective about the guys that I dated. Frankly, none of them were really what I was looking for. They were either too crude or too tall or too loud etc. etc. etc. Basically I was able to find an unbearable flaw in nearly every guy that had tried to catch my eye. Hey, if it was someone that I may potentially spend the rest of my life with then why shouldn't I aim for the best?

"He wants in your pants already?!" Sora exclaimed. "No way, I am not letting that sex-crazed maniac near my little brother!" Sora triumphantly shouted before running over to me and crushing my entire upper body in an overly-enthusiastic bear hug. This kid was having one hell of a hug fetish today.

"No, that is NOT what I said!" I grunted while trying to pry my twin brother off of me. "Don't jump to conclusions," I reprimanded angrily as I was finally able to free myself from his iron grip. I silently wondered if he had broken any of my ribs with his painful display of affection just now.

"But you don't deny that there _is_ a man in your life?" Kairi slyly added. Damn women and their ability to twist your words. I wished I could just end this conversation now and hope that they all forget about it all.

I pinched the bridge of my nose with my pointer finger and thumb. This was all beginning to give me a headache. "He's just a friend of mine that I met last semester. We ran into each other today and grabbed some coffee. That's all."

And that was really all it had been. Well, unless you consider the fact that Axel had picked me up in a sex shop. And that we had walked up and down the street with his arm around me. And that he had kissed me like that. Yeah, that one sort of seemed to test the boundaries of platonic friendship just a bit.

"Did he offer to go grab some coffee or did you?" Kairi asked pointedly. I half expected her to pull out a notepad and write down every detail about what I was saying. I sighed inwardly, knowing that it was now my turn to be subjected to Kairi's insufferable interrogation.

"He did."

"And who paid?"

"He did, but-"

"Uh-huh. When are you going to see him again?"

I swallowed, knowing this was only going to dig me deeper into a hole. The conversation was slowly drifting away from the information that I was willing to release.

"…Thursday."

I noticed the coy little smirk that had crept onto Kairi's face. Damn her!

"Did he try to get you to do anything dirty?"

"God, no! I thought we already covered that!"

I knew my face had slowly been heating up over the course of our discussion. I glanced out of the corner of my eye to see a very interested Sora and Riku hanging on my every word. Well glad I could provide you guys with some entertainment this afternoon.

"Did you kiss?"

My jaw dropped. I had immediately screwed myself over when I didn't reply quickly enough. Fuck fuck _fuck_ I should have immediately denied her claims. I saw three sets of teeth as the traitors I had originally assumed were my friends flashed their knowing smiles at me. Ugh, why can't I ever have any fucking privacy?

"Who was the instigator?" Kairi asked finally, not even trying to contain the smile in here voice. She had finally gotten to what she really wanted to know. I hated myself for giving her exactly what she wanted to hear.

I buried my face in my hands in defeat and replied with a muffled, "He did."

Sora was rolling on the floor laughing, saying something along the lines of, "Roxas has a boyfriend! Roxas is in looooooove!" Seriously sometimes I wondered how on earth he was the older twin. Maybe our mom dropped him on his head as a baby. Meanwhile Kairi was giggling uncontrollably, obviously delighted with herself and amused with Sora's antics on the floor. Riku was laughing too. Thanks so much for making me feel completely embarrassed.

Now it was my turn to head out for some fresh air. I got up from my bed and left the three of them gossiping excitedly in _my_ room. Well for the record Riku wasn't really participating in any of the gossiping, he just kinda stood there laughing while Kairi squeezed every detail that she could out of Sora about our brief encounter earlier that day in Starbucks. Seriously, was this high school?

I walked out of our building and wandered down the path out to the large garden that was conveniently situated next door. I walked slowly through the front gate with my hands in my pockets and strolled slowly down the path.

I wondered if I'd run into Hayner while I was in here. The garden was a great place to go when you really just needed some peace and quiet. It was the middle of a Sunday afternoon so there weren't very many people here today. Everyone was probably out trying to enjoy the last few remnants of their weekend before starting another week of school.

I let out an exasperated sigh, hoping to expel all of the pent up stress and frustration from my body. I loved my friends and my brother dearly, but sometimes they could be a bit much. I don't know why I had been so embarrassed, maybe because I had never been this interested in anyone before. It made me feel so unsure, and so conscious about all of the things that I could do to screw it up. Obviously it didn't help when this was all paired with obnoxious teasing, courteousy of those near and dear to me.

I realized that I had probably made Hayner feel this way earlier when I had poked fun at his obvious crush on this guy Seifer. I immediately felt bad about what I had done. Hayner's situation was most likely worse than mine, as he was also dealing with confusion over his sexuality. Leave it to me to be a total ass and make him feel like shit.

I decided that I'd try to look for him if I could. I wanted to apologize for being such a dick. After taking a slightly less traveled path through some overgrown willow trees I came across Hayner leaning on the railing of the little bridge that was over the river that flowed through the garden. His shoulders were hunched as he stared out at nothing, cigarette firmly between clamped lips with a thin trail of smoke curling upward.

"Hey." I said as I walked up one side of the bridge. He didn't make any motion acknowledging the fact that he knew I had approached him, but he knew I was there.

I folded my arms on the railing and rested my chin on them as I gazed out across the meadow on the other side of the river; just beyond the area we were currently standing in. This place was unbelievably serene and beautiful. I loved coming here alone and just enjoying the natural splendor. This was just a great place to think. Just as my thoughts were about to drift towards a certain green-eyed, redheaded individual, Hayner finally spoke.

"Roxas?" he said, not moving an inch.

"Yeah?" I responded, still staring ahead of me at the grass as it rippled in the wind.

There was a brief silence before he decided to begin speaking again.

"When… when you first realized you were…. you know, gay? I mean…. what did you do? How did you know?" he asked, and I could hear the strain in his voice. Each and every word seemed to be struggling to get out of his mouth as he spoke to me. This was obviously not a topic that Hayner had previously discussed with anyone before.

I sighed. I was never really good at this kind of thing.

"I don't know, I just sort of… knew. Like, I had never really had an interest in girls, you know? So one day I started wondering if maybe I wasn't interested in them because I was interested in guys. I was really upset about it at first, I mean, I didn't want to be _gay_. I thought there must be something wrong with me, but after a while…. I don't know, I just sort of came to terms with it I guess."

I turned to look at my friend. "There's absolutely nothing wrong with being gay, Hayner."

I saw his eye twitch for a moment before he choked out, "I know," before burying his head in his hands. His shoulders shook with each sob that erupted from his shaking body, and I placed my hand on his shoulder.

"Nobody is going to treat you any different. You aren't any less of a person because of this. I want you to know that it's okay, and that if anyone ever tells you otherwise that they're wrong. Stop keeping yourself from what makes you happy," I added, patting his shoulder reassuringly.

We just sat there like that for a few minutes; Hayner's trembling slowly dying down as his breathing became more regular. It was a while longer before he lifted his head and wiped away at the corners of his eyes. He let out a long, ragged breath before turning to me and smiling weakly.

"You know, you're a great friend Roxas. I really mean it."

I was taken aback. Hayner never got this mushy around anyone. I was slightly flattered, but also slightly uncomfortable. Hey, I may be gay but I'm still a guy and we suck at this emotional shit.

"Don't mention it, but don't you try to get in my pants because that's where I draw the line," I replied with a smile. Joking around was always the easiest way to lighten the mood in my opinion.

He chuckled, though it sounded like a cough. He sniffed before slowly turning away from the bridge's railing and walking back towards our building.

"Let's head back, yeah?" he said over his shoulder as he continued walking.

"Sure," I responded with a smile as I ran to catch up with my friend.


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: I do not own Kingdom Hearts, or any other sort of franchise mentioned in this story. This story is mine, however.

Author's Note: Welcome to Chapter 4! So after that little bit of Hayner/Seifer flair in the last chapter, I was reminded of the first time I played Kingdom Hearts 2 and I seriously thought the "gang rivalry" between the two groups was straight outta Westside Story. Seriously, someone should make a KH fic that's based off of Westside Story, only it's set in Twilight Town. Ha ha ha ha ha! But who would be Maria? Hayner? XD Roxas? O_o Well someone's gotta sing "I Feel Pretty" y'know. If anyone knows of a story like that which already exists, PLEASE share it with me. I will love you immensely.

The unique thing about "Blush" that really makes this story interesting is the fact that I'm pretty much just writing each chapter as it pops into my head. I had originally intended to kick off my fanfiction career with a story called "My Sanctuary" that was also AkuRoku-centric (and also a college fic), but with a little more depth and organization. I still have all of the ideas for that story, as well as new ones that I've added in since the creation of "Blush" and such. I'm not sure what compelled me to begin with this story instead, but it doesn't matter. I'm enjoying this one just fine (and I hope you are too). :)

I also have a one-shot in the making. Nothing smutty (sorry fangirls), but it's just a little something I came up with the other day. I'm sure I'll get it on here eventually. Just letting you guys know what's in store! Thanks again to all of my wonderful reviewers, subscribers, fans, etc. I love each and every one of you! 3

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It was Wednesday.

Wednesday.

Somehow over the past few days I had managed to survive two midterms, one massive essay, an emotionally unstable roommate who had only recently come out of the closet, an angry Kairi who was consistently plagued by the nightly romps my brother and his boyfriend had in the room directly above hers, endless teasing and taunting over my "date" (it is so not a date) on Thursday night, Sora's horrible singing voice, and a mild power outage that nearly resulted in disaster as Hayner hadn't saved his eleven page essay. Thank God for technology, I seriously would have feared for my life had his laptop not backed up the file.

All in all, a few pretty uninteresting days. At least, I had pretty much deemed my life uninteresting ever since a certain red-haired man had wandered back into my life. Pathetic, isn't it? It was as if the world was colored in dull, dingy colors; although Axel could certainly bring a splash of color into my dreary life.

So, it was Wednesday. I was lying on my stomach across my bed and typing away at yet another assignment for my creative writing class. It was a class that was entirely focused on short stories, and to be frank, I was worried that I'd run out of ideas before the semester was over. My professor was like a madman, expecting a fresh new idea every other week. My nineteen year-old brain felt like it was being wrung dry, slowly squeezing out the last remnants of ideas which trickled down into my fingers and were then transferred into my laptop to churn out yet another half-baked story. I don't know how the hell my professor expected all of these to be any good. I had exhausted all of my creativity a long time ago. I'm ready for a break.

Hayner had left for class over two hours ago. He was about a far from a morning person as one could possibly be, so he dealt with it by taking only night classes. Sure his day may not have started until two in the afternoon, but then he'd be in class until it was past ten o'clock. I didn't mind him stumbling in at ten thirty with an armful of books, but it certainly made making plans to go out at night difficult. Everyone had to work around the fact that Hayner was in class all night and Sora was constantly working the closing shifts at the restaurant he worked in.

Sora didn't really have a choice, seeing as how nights and weekends were pretty much the only times in which he was available, but it was Hayner's own fault for taking all of those night classes. Whatever floats his boat I guess. He had yet to mention anything about his "Seifer problem" since Sunday, and I wasn't about to press him for information. I knew my friend, and I knew that he would come to talk to me if he wanted. I just wished that the girls would stop pestering him so much, as _I _would ultimately be the one to suffer when he would explode after one of their interrogation sessions.

"So tell us more about this Seifer guy!" Kairi would ask excitedly. Ever since Hayner had officially come out of the closet she would not leave him alone for a second without asking him something about his love life.

Hayner grunted, mouth full of Lucky Charms as they ate breakfast together in the dining hall.

"Aww, you're no fun!" Selphie would whine. I really felt bad for my friend when the girls would gang up on him like this.

"At least tell us if he's hot!" Kairi chirped.

The glare that Hayner shot her could have burned a hole in a brick wall. I couldn't tell if they seriously did not get the hint that he wanted to drop the conversation or if they were just stupid.

"What does he look like? Is he tall? What kind of clothes does he wear? C'mon Hayner pleeeeease?" Selphie pleaded. She hadn't changed a bit since high school, still living off of the latest gossip.

Yeah I know, I came to college with my friends from high school. Judge me all you want. It's not like we all went to Twilight Town. Namine had gone of to some prestigious art school in Radiant Garden, and Tidus and Wakka were both on sports scholarships at the University of Olympus. I won't deny that I'm thankful for having so many of my friends here with me at college. It made adjusting a whole lot easier. I had made new friends (like Axel, although none were quite as good-looking), but it was always nice to have a "safety net" of sorts to fall back on.

Back to my desperate quest for creative genius.

So this was my life right now. I had been staring at the same sentence for about ten minutes straight; glazed eyes refusing to take in the meaning of the words I myself had just input into the computer. My heart just wasn't into my work today. I mean, I guess I've just been distracted. It's hard to focus on school when you have a very sexy redhead on your mind, one who promised to call you or text you before Thursday.

Which is tomorrow by the way.

Because it's Wednesday.

Ugh. I can't believe I'm getting so hung over some _guy_. It's disgusting.

My actions betrayed my thoughts however as I pushed my laptop away and pulled myself into a sitting position, back against the wall. There was no way I was going to get anything productive done right now anyway. How long am I gonna let these thoughts of Axel torment me like this? I mean, it was just a kiss, and we barely know each other. I mean, this was the first time I'd seen the guy in what, four months? Ridiculous. I'm being utterly ridiculous.

But unfortunately I know that my will won't ever be able to hold its own against this rush of emotion that I feel every time I even think of Axel. It's like he's got this invisible hold on me, and I hate it. I don't want him to have this much power over me. I've been hurt before, I don't want to get too attached. But somehow, I can't seem to help myself. I inwardly kick myself, knowing that I'm setting myself up for disaster. Again.

C'mon Roxas, didn't you learn your lesson last time?

So the issue stands: let myself go and bask in the splendor of temporary pleasure of the deity that is Axel, or put up a wall and save what's left of my fragile self-esteem.

Pfft.

As I'm resting my head against the wall I close my eyes and allow myself to slowly visualize Axel's features. Nobody else can see my thoughts, so I shouldn't feel embarrassed over thinking about him this much. I can think whatever I want to fucking think.

I start with his angular face, drawing in each curve and corner of his face. His features look so sharp. I want to touch them to see if they're really as sharp as they seem. I know plenty of guys (and girls) who would kill to have such a gorgeous profile. I swear, it's like his face was sculpted by some great artist. I don't know how anyone could be so… beautiful. It's not fair.

Next, that lovely face of his. I go crazy over the smooth texture of his pale skin. I wonder if he's ever had a zit in his life. Probably not. Lucky bastard. His complexion seems flawless, and so soft. His face always seemed so soft. Something so pure can't be altered with hard expressions, for I had seen his frustration melt away right in front of my very eyes. Soft. His face must be very soft.

His hair was always something that captivated me. That's definitely the brightest shade of red I've ever seen on anyone, at least without it looking obviously dyed. That's the thing, I can't tell if it's his natural hair color or not. I want to ask him. I want to run my fingers through those long tresses and feel each fiber between my fingertips. At first glance, his hair seems to cause alarm; it's as if a flame is bursting forth from his scalp. This may seem appropriate at first, and it is, but it is only after careful consideration that one can truly inspect the ruby red locks. When looking closer, they don't look dangerous at all. In fact, they look rather… touchable. It's like a magnet that is taunting my fingers, begging them to come closer; to test the theory. Like his personality, he seems so rough and dangerous at first, but it's only after closer inspection that one can truly see the softness to him. It's something I feel should be respected. Not many people can put up the confident front that is secretly backed by compassion with quite such skill.

Green. It floods my world whenever I look at him. Yes, his eyes are green; but the most wonderful shade of green on the planet (at least I think so, and therefore everyone should). Piercing. That seems to be the most appropriate word to describe just now powerful his eyes are. It's as if they can see right through you, straight through to your soul. I really came to believe this was true after the numerous times in which he seemed to see right through my poor attempts at trying to cover up something.

"You always suck at lying Roxas, I can see it in your eyes! C'mon, just tell me!"

My face flushed red, I couldn't believe that he had figured me out _again_.

"Fine. I leaned in to kiss her and… I don't know. I just got so nervous, like I knew I would do something wrong…"

I could see him leaning out of his seat towards me. I almost hoped he would fall over. At least that would give me something to laugh at him for instead of the other way around for a change.

"And?" Axel asked with an expectant grin. It was almost as if he was holding back a tirade of laughter, as if he knew my response would be beyond embarrassing.

"And I ended up kissing her kind of half on her nose and half on her upper lip." I finished as I hung my head in shame. How did he always manage to get these stories out of me?

Sure enough, he flung his head back, hair rippling like wildfire, and burst out laughing. Despite how flustered I felt, his laugh always made me melt. It was the most beautiful sound in the world in my opinion, and these were the thoughts that really had me questioning my sexuality lately. Pushing this thought from my mind, I smile and just admire the laughter that ripples through Axel's features and out of his mouth.

"Way to make me feel like I fail at life." I say drearily, trying my best to make him feel bad for what he did.

Still laughing, Axel wipes a few tears from the corners of his eyes before responding, "Sorry Roxie, but you totally set yourself up for that."

My face flushed. "_I_ set it up? You were the one who asked me to tell you about my first kiss!"

"Yes but you were just so bad at making it sound casual, it was adorable. I couldn't help myself."

I laugh, remembering our playful banter during last semester. Bringing myself back to the present, the noise startles me, as I have grown accustomed to the silence. I shake my head, feeling silly for startling myself with my own laughter. How stupid.

Now, where was I?

Those tattoos. Hmm. I still can't help but wince whenever I see them. Facial tattoos are some kind of pain, at least from what I've heard. Still, they make Axel look so unique, so dangerous, and so… _sexy_. I want to hear the story behind them. I want to discover the secret reason behind those extraordinary facial markings. The warrior's war paint. I want to trace them with my fingertips, almost like some sort of test to see if they're really there, or if I can wipe them away with the simplest touch.

Axel's mouth is both the epitome of all things sexy, as well as all things that should never be said. Sometimes that guy doesn't know when to keep his trap shut; but in a way it's something that I love about him.

Oh I did _not_ just use the l-word. Fuck that.

I'm sure that devilish smirk of his had made many ladies swoon, as well as irked many unknowing bystanders. That signature smile is probably one of the biggest contributors to the confident, arrogant appearance that Axel puts forth when seen for the first time. He is a little intimidating. And some of the shit that comes out of that mouth? Of course he is always seemingly unfazed by whatever nonsense he comes up with, whether it's a dirty joke, an inappropriate assumption, or just a snide remark, Axel takes nothing back. Conviction. It's really an admirable quality.

What a curious individual. I always find myself wondering if anyone else is as captivated by this man as I am. I feel myself feeling slightly possessive, not wanting anyone to discover this hidden treasure of mine. I'm incredibly intrigued by him. I want to learn more about him. I want to hear what's really going on inside that gorgeous head of his. I want to feel him. I want to trail my hands across his heated skin, across each muscle, memorizing each and every inch of him until I know him better than I know myself.

I want him to touch me. I want to feel his strong hands greedily grabbing at me, telling me they want me. I want to feel his lips again, pressed to my lips, my neck, my entire body.

My eyes snapped open. Holy shit, am I getting… _aroused_? I looked down at my pants to see a considerable bulge growing there in-between my legs.

Fuck. I can't believe I just turned myself on just thinking about the bastard. Well, Hayner won't be back until much later, and if I lock the door then I don't have to worry about unwanted visitors while I take care of this problem…

I shudder at the thought of Kairi bursting in on me jacking off. I'd never hear the end of it for sure.

Wait, am I suggesting I jack off to thoughts about _Axel_?! A guy I knew for a few months who, as far as I know, considers me as a _friend_? Well, maybe friends with benefits. We did kiss.

Aw hell, I'm just gonna do it.

I get up off of my bed, uncomfortably, and walk over to the door. I slide the lock into place. Awkwardly I walk back to my bed and let out a deep breath. I seriously can't believe I'm about to do this.

Slowly, I lower my pants and let them slide down my legs and pool around my ankles. I kick them off and crawl into bed. I involuntarily let out a low hiss as the fabric of my boxers graze across my now prominent erection as I begin to slide them off of my body. I slowly encircle my fingers around myself and begin to pump.

And then my phone rings.

Ugh. It's probably Sora calling to ask about something stupid like how to unstick the shopping carts at Target (or something even more ridiculous). Opening one eye I glance down at the front screen of my phone with the intent to ignore whoever decided to call me and continue with what I was doing. The name on the caller ID pops up and I pale.

Axel.

Well, knowing Axel he had to put something clever when he input himself into my phonebook. It actually says Axel the Sex God. I snort. Typical.

This certainly isn't a call I should ignore, or want to for that matter. Feeling a little embarrassed with my current predicament, as well as disappointed with this sudden turn of events, I reach for my phone with my free hand and press the "send" button before bringing it to my ear.

"Hello?"

_Roxas! It's me, Axel! I hope I didn't catch you at a bad time. Miss me?_

Yes.

"Well seeing as how we saw each other three days ago I'm not sure I had enough time to miss you, Ax."

_Aww, that breaks my heart Roxie. And here I thought we had something special._

I can hear the laughter in his voice. Two can definitely play at this game.

"What makes you think I'm not just playing hard to get?" I say with mock innocence, a satisfied smirk painted across my face.

He waits a moment or two before responding, but when he does I feel my face heat up.

_Mmmm… I always do like a challenge. Don't worry baby, I'll get you to see things my way._

I can almost visualize him winking. I didn't even try to hide the shudder that ran through my body when he _purred_ into the phone like that. Axel is positively oozing arousal right now. Is it just me or did his voice seem to sound lower all of a sudden? I slowly bring my left hand back to my throbbing erection; the need for release outweighing the shame of getting off to Axel's voice over the phone.

"H-ha ha. Well we'll see about that. So what did you really call for? I seriously doubt it was just to hit on me," I ask, trying to sound as normal as possible. I hope that he didn't hear the break in my voice.

_Just wanted to hear you speak Roxie. I do enjoy hearing the sound of your voice.. Also I have details about tomorrow night that I figured you'd probably want to know._

I shiver. There he goes again, throwing out these comments like they're nothing. If only he knew just how much I was enjoying the sound of _his_ voice right now. My hand speeds up, pumping slightly faster than before.

"What kind of details?" I say through gritted teeth. I'm honestly amazed with myself for even making it this far and sounding remotely normal.

_Well first of all, would you prefer it if Demyx and I picked you up from your place, or do you just want to show up yourself? I didn't know if you were busy beforehand or…_

I smiled. I pictured Axel sitting cross-legged on his bed, scratching the back of his head as he asked me whether or not I wanted him to pick me up. Insecure Axel is very cute. Of course, this further inhibited me as I continued to pleasure myself to this image. I wanted to hang up and finish without embarrassing myself by moaning into the receiver or doing something else horribly shameful, but I just couldn't tear myself away from hearing his seductive, tantalizing voice.

"If you guys would pick me up that'd be great," I paused, afraid that he'd be suspicious if I gasped in-between words. "I live on-campus in Sandlot Building E."

_Sandlot, E, got it. Ok so I guess we'll come get you around 9. Good?_

"Unh. Perfect." Oh no. I hope he didn't hear that obvious groan just now. Please, _please_ let him have overlooked it.

_Alrighty then Roxie, I look forward to seeing you again. I'll let you get back to… finishing whatever you were doing._

Fuck him and his soul-seeing abilities. I could almost hear the smirk that was tied to the end of his words. Why does stuff like this always seem to happen to me when he's involved?

"Sure whatever, bye." I tried to sound as nonchalant as possible. I hope it worked, but I seriously doubted it did anything to repair the damage that I had inflicted upon myself. I hung up the phone and dropped it onto the mattress as I allowed myself to, as Axel so eloquently put it, "finish what I was doing." My head was filled with thoughts of Axel kissing me, talking to me, wrapping his arm around my shoulders. I allowed myself to replay his voice over and over again through my head, like my favorite song on repeat. I imagined what it would be like for him to whisper sweet nothings into my ear, to trail his fingers across my skin like fire, to ravage my mouth with passionate kisses, to fuck me senseless up against my bedroom wall.

I let out a strangled cry as I came, making a mess all over my hands and stomach. I panted, slowly coming down from my self-inflicted high. As the stars disappeared from my vision, I looked around at where I was sitting. The damage to the bed sheets was minimal, but I'm too much of a neat freak to just continue using them. I bundled up my top sheet and threw it into the dirty clothes hamper after using it to clean myself off. Hopefully Hayner wouldn't notice. That would be an uncomfortable conversation.

"_Hey Roxas, why is only your top sheet missing?"_

"_Well you see, it got dirty when I was jacking off on the phone with this guy."_

Yeah like I'd seriously ever say something like that.

I grabbed a few tissues from my desk and cleaned the mess off of my hands. I balled up them up and threw them into the trash. I sighed as I pulled up my boxers, followed by my pants. What's done is done, no matter how embarrassed or ashamed I may feel about what I just did. I fell backwards onto my bed, slinging one arm across my eyes. I decided to just lie here for a minute; perhaps basking my afterglow, or simply allowing myself to rest. Ever so slowly, a smile crept onto my features.

I was going to see Axel, and I was going to see him tomorrow night.

There was definitely a skip in my step as I got up and unlocked the door before walking out into the hallway and out towards the dining hall.


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: I do not own Kingdom Hearts, its characters, Disney, or any other thing specifically mentioned in this story. I do however own a particularly comfy pair of pajama pants that I think I will put on right now...

Author's note: Welcome to Chapter 5! Thanks again to all of my lovely reviewers, subscribers, fans, people who secretly read my story, etc. You are all very important to me, I promise! So I wanted to take the time to talk to everyone about updates. Now I've been updating fairly frequently lately, but I have no set schedule for updating that I abide by. This is just to let you know that if in the future there is a large gap in-between chapters that I am probably just really busy or something. I promise I will explain myself for any large breaks in updating, so don't freak out! Thanks, and much love!

This chapter's kinda long, which is a good thing! Usually I write out a chapter and then go back through it and add in a lot of extra stuff to make it more dense, but this time I barely had to do any of that. The chapter was pretty full on its own. I'll try to keep the chapters around the same size for the sake of consistency, but I'm not making any promises! This story is incredibly freeform, but I think that actually adds to its appeal (in my opinion :3). Ok, enough of my incessant rambling. Enjoy, you guys!

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"Oh you have _got_ to be fucking kidding me."

Leave it to Sora and Kairi to pull something like this.

"What? I think it would make you look great! C'mon Roxas, you'd look like one fine piece of ass in this outfit," Kairi retorted with a wink. I groaned and rolled my eyes at the ridiculous assortment of clothing that she was holding in front of my face.

"As much as it sickens me to agree with a statement concerning my twin brother looking like a fine piece of ass, I do think it would grab Axel's attention for sure," Sora added thoughtfully.

I ran my eyes up and down the clothing again. Dangling from Kairi's well-manicured hands was a black fishnet shirt that looked _way_ to small for me (or anyone over the age of nine for that matter), and leather pants that looked as tight as fuck. There is no possible way that would be even remotely comfortable. Did she forget that I don't have a vagina?

Sitting next to her on the bed, Sora was trying to dazzle me with his assortment of metal jewelry, and various other accessories that may be pinned to clothes such as these. I never knew Sora had such a vast collection of bling. Sure, he had that crown necklace that Riku had bought him for their one year anniversary (oh, and that silly little Mickey Mouse keychain that he always had hanging from his belt loop), but he could open up a fucking jewelry store with all of the shit he had scattered on his bed.

We were in Sora and Riku's room, planning what I was to wear tonight; although I was somehow left out of this planning process. Sora and Kairi had taken it upon themselves to "make me presentable" for the party. I sighed. I felt perfectly fine with a pair of skinny jeans and a hoodie, but noooooooooo Kairi wouldn't even hear of it. I needed to be "sexed up" in her opinion.

I plopped down on Riku's bed in exasperation, rubbing the bridge of my nose with my thumb and pointer finger. They were making this so difficult, and so unnecessarily _embarrassing_. I was now worrying twice as much as I had been before over what Axel would think of my appearance. Would he really like something like that terrifying outfit that Kairi had in her hands? I was weighing out the pros and cons of wearing such a ridiculous outfit.

I will never fit in that thing.

But hey, it'll probably make my ass look fantastic.

What if he thinks I look like a slut?

What if he likes me looking like a slut?

What if his friends think I'm a slut?

What am I going to do when I have to go to the bathroom? I'm gonna need a locksmith to get all of Sora's little metal dangly thingies off of me to even undo my fucking pants.

And then the most terrifying thought of all occurred to me: I was sitting on Riku's bed.

Where he and my twin brother are almost constantly – OH GOD.

I leapt off of the bed and dusted off my pants, as if I could somehow purge myself of the horrible, awful things that I might have just been in contact with. It was bad enough having to deal with the thought of my brother having sex, but it was another thing entirely to come into the contact with the nest of sin in which he and his lover perform their dirty deeds almost constantly.

Sora and Kairi looked over at me with puzzled expressions, obviously surprised by my sudden outburst. My sudden movement had probably reminded them that I was there.

"What's wrong, Roxas?" Sora asked with a concerned expression.

"Is there a spider or something?" Kairi asked, her face distorted with fear. Kairi absolutely _hated_ spiders.

I looked at the two of them. My face was still scrunched up with disgust and discomfort. I imagined that I looked like a kid who had just eaten something incredibly nasty, like a worm or something.

I swallowed. "Well, I guess I just realized where I had been sitting and it didn't sit well with me," I answered, feeling uncomfortable.

"On Riku's bed? What's wrong with – oh. Oh gross!" Kairi responded, going through various facial expressions as she did so. Confusion. Realization. Nausea.

I felt a little bad for now sharing my misfortune with her, but she was probably able to deal with it better anyway. I mean, she had been almost entirely numb to Sora's and Riku's relationship (except for the rare instances in which she would come running to us) due to her constantly being around them; and under their room.

Then again, she wasn't related to either of them. I found myself feeling nauseous again and gripped at my stomach.

Sora turned his attention back to fiddling with the various pieces of jewelry strewn across his bed. Nonchalantly he stated, "Y'know it doesn't really matter where you guys sit or stand. Riku and I have pretty much had sex on every surface in this room."

There was a crash as Kairi abruptly stood up straight after she had been casually leaning against Sora's desk. She had knocked over his chair in her desperate attempt to get away from the defiled object. What had happened to my sweet, innocent brother? I wonder if I'll ever be able to set foot in this room again…

"Anyway, let's get back to the task at hand. Roxas, what are you going to wear tonight?" Sora asked, attempting to distract us from this newfound mind pollution.

It was probably for the best that I forget any of this ever happened. I gingerly sat back down on the bed, ignoring my mind's screaming protests over the awful things that have been done on this exact object. "I just wanted to wear what I usually wear. I mean, I might scare him if he shows up and I look like I'm dressed for some homosexual Halloween party," I responded. I had firmly decided against wearing that god-awful outfit.

Kairi stuck out her bottom lip and pouted as she looked over at me with wide eyes. "Aww, c'mon Roxas pleeeeease? I just think this would look so great on you! If you don't wear them then what am I supposed to do with these clothes?"

My eye twitched. Why did she even have these clothes in the first place? I wasn't sure I wanted to know the reason behind them. Maybe Namine had sent them to her to try and get either me or Sora to wear it. Namine was a total yaoi fangirl, and she was so delighted to be friends with such "delicious ukes" as she so often put it. It was funny just how different Kairi and Namine were. They were twins as well; fraternal twins rather than identical twins like Sora and me. Namine didn't even go to our school, the two were that independent. Sure, they still had that special twin connection and shit, but they weren't as inseparable as Sora and I. We couldn't even bear the thought of going to different colleges; we just… needed to be around each other too much. I mean, I know we're really different and Sora and I bother each other all of the time, but deep down we have a truly unbreakable bond. Our friends are constantly calling us out on "freaky twin stuff" like when we finish each other's sentences and shit.

I sighed, and looked over at her. "No, Kairi. I'm just going to wear some regular clothes, okay?" I responded firmly. She slumped her shoulders in defeat, and I immediately felt a small twinge of guilt. "But maybe another time okay?" I added. Internally I was kicking myself. I knew that I was definitely going to regret saying that when I saw that wicked grin light up her features.

"Okay, okay. I won't help you Roxas. Not _this_ time," she added, and I must say it sounded quite evil.

I glanced down at my cell phone. It was 7:40. I still had over an hour before Axel and his friend Demyx would be by to pick me up.

"Okay boys, I'm going to go call Namine so I'll see you both later. I'd promise her that I'd update her on Operation Roxas Goes Yaoi," Kairi said as she collected her things to leave.

I blinked. "Roxas goes… yaoi?! What the fuck kind of name is that?"

She shrugged. "I dunno. She just wanted something with a clever anagram. Operation Roxas Goes Yaoi spells orgy," Kairi added with a laugh. "Later!" she shouted over her shoulder as she left.

I was utterly speechless. Sora obviously wasn't as he burst into a fit of laughter. "Ha ha ha ha, that's priceless! Man I love Namine, she cracks me up!" he exclaimed with tears rolling out of his eyes. I couldn't help but be slightly amused by how red his face had gotten due to his hysterical laughter. I did love seeing Sora happy (even when it was at my expense).

"Yeah, yeah. Hilarious," I responded in mock anger. Sora knew I wasn't really upset and he smiled up at me.

"I'm really glad you're trying out dating again," he said with such a sweet smile. "Really glad."

I reached down and held my twin's hand. I knew how much he had hurt both during and after my previous relationship. It had just been a bad time in my life; well, our lives. I'm glad Riku was there for Sora to turn to when I wasn't able to be there for him. I owe him a lot for that. I didn't even know who I was during that time in my life. I really felt like I had let Sora down, both because I had brought pain upon myself and for bringing pain upon him. Sora was the most important person to me. He was my other half and he had been there for me in my darkest hour. He would always love me no matter how ugly or despicable I felt I had become. I knew he only wanted me to be happy, and for me to find such a great love like the one that he had found in Riku. They were one of those picture-perfect couples that everyone hated because they seemed to have absolutely no problems. Yeah, they're pretty great.

I smiled. "I think the world's finally ready for me to come out of retirement. There are a lot of men out there who are just waiting to be seduced," I said jokingly. Sora chuckled and stood up from his bed.

"Well I hope that one day you'll find one who's really special. You deserve to be cherished, Roxas," Sora added lovingly. Dang, why was he being so mushy today? He knew I wasn't good at talking about serious stuff like love.

"Thanks, Sora." I sighed with relief when he began to put all of his silver accessories away and changed the topic. "Riku and I are going to head down to the pier this Saturday night, just for fun y'know?"

I nodded, toying with my phone. I found myself lingering on Axel's name in my contacts much longer than I had with any of the other names.

"If tonight goes well, you should bring Axel and come along. We'll make it a double date," Sora added. I looked up at him and he winked. I felt a small blush creeping onto my features. I hadn't even thought past tonight, much less about a _second_ night out with Axel.

I smiled. "Yeah, that would be nice."

Just as I looked down at my phone for the billionth time, the soft click of the door being opened caused me to turn my head towards the doorway.

"Riku!" Sora squealed as he lunged for the tall silver-haired figure that had just walked through the door. Riku responded with a pained grunt as Sora tackled him to the ground, arms wrapped firmly around his lover's waist. After the air had returned to his lungs, Riku pried an arm from Sora's tight grip and ran his fingers through Sora's soft brown hair.

"Hey babe. Hey Roxas."

Riku was a man of very few words.

"Hey Riku. Sorry, if I'd had known you were coming in sooner I would have tried to restrain him or something," I replied with a laugh.

"Oh don't worry about it," Riku responded lazily. "He always does this."

I laughed, sounds like Sora. I would be lying if I were to say that I wasn't jealous of my twin brother. Riku was a fantastic boyfriend (and hot damn he was sexy!), and the two of them just _worked_. Everything that Sora was, Riku was not. The same worked in the opposite way. They were simply two halves of a whole. When I saw the two of them together, I believed in soul mates; and believe me that's saying something. I never believe in mushy, romantic crap like that. Most of it is just fairy tales that people create in hopes that they have someone out there who will find them and cater to their every need. Not my thing.

Seemingly comfortable with their position on the floor, Sora nuzzled Riku's chest as Riku continued to massage Sora's scalp. The black messenger bag that Riku had been carrying was lying next to him, partially open with its contents beginning to spill out. I didn't think Riku cared whether or not his stuff was all over the floor though. He probably wouldn't care if the entire building blew up right now. The two of them looked so… content; just content with life and with each other's presence, and everything. They probably weren't even aware that I was still there (which was probably a good thing since I had been staring at them for the past few minutes and probably would have been a little freaky).

Wait, how long had I been in here exactly? I looked down at my cell phone and the time read 8:20. Shit and I still wanted to take a shower. I quickly got up off of Riku's bed and Sora's eyes snapped open.

"Oh, sorry Roxas! You probably didn't wanna see all that, huh? Sorry, sorry!" Sora apologized over and over as he climbed off of Riku and dusted off his shirt. He looked up at me with a sheepish grin as he rubbed the back of his head nervously, a blush spreading over his features.

I smiled and shook my head. "Don't worry about it. I'm gonna go finish getting ready. I'll see you two later, alright?" I said as I walked towards their door.

"Okay, bye! Have a good time and I want to hear _everything_ about it tomorrow okay?" Sora said as he rushed over and pulled me into a quick hug. I returned the gesture before turning again to leave. Riku raised his hand in acknowledgement and I saluted him. I closed the door behind me and turned to walk down the hallway.

The Sandlot was the name given to a bunch of two-story buildings that were mostly inhabited by freshman at the University. Riku and Sora lived on the west side of our building, in room 228. Pretty much it was girls on the first floor and boys on the second floor. Kairi and Selphie were in room 128, directly underneath the two horny teenagers. Hayner and I were on the opposite side of the building in room 213. The odd numbers made up the east side of the building and the even numbers were on the west. The hall was split in half by a small common room and a staircase. The dorms weren't glamorous, but they were comfortable.

I had finally made it to mine and Hayner's room as I hurriedly slipped my key into the door and turned it, greeted by vast darkness. Obviously Hayner was still not back from his class. I flipped the light on quickly and grabbed all of my shower equipment before heading back out into the hallway and down towards the bathroom.

As I entered the communal restroom I was pleasantly surprised to find that nobody else was in there. The dorms were usually pretty subdued on Thursday nights, as everyone was usually out partying already. It was easy to get away with not having classes on Fridays here, so most everyone had a three-day weekend, starting on Thursday night. I walked over to the good shower and placed my plastic basket of shampoo, conditioner, body wash, etc. inside. Yeah I know, I use a lot of products. I just like being clean. Smelling good is a big deal to me; a _big_ deal.

I stripped myself of all of my clothing before stepping into the shower. I was being a little careless tonight, as I had pretty much just changed in the middle of the bathroom, but I was in a hurry and nobody else was in here so I didn't feel too bad about it. The warm water felt fantastic on my skin, but I knew I couldn't stand here for too long. I had given myself a strict schedule to abide by. I was allowed ten minutes to shower tonight, as I wanted to make sure I looked as good as possible by the time Axel showed up.

After I was thoroughly clean (and smelled fantastic by the way) I quickly exited the bathroom and rushed back to my bedroom to change. I slipped on a pair of black and white checkered boxers that had been sitting on top of the small chest of drawers in my closet. I hung my towel over my chair as I rummaged through my closet for more clothes to wear. My hair was still wet and clinging to my face, but I'd deal with that later. No use styling my hair when I still needed to pull a shirt or two over my head.

I dug for a solid minute before I found my favorite jeans. I pulled them off of their hanger and looked them up and down approvingly. I slipped them on and buttoned them. They were a little snug, but after a while I knew they'd stretch a little; not too much to take away from their definite sex appeal however. Next, I pulled out a black Coheed and Cambria shirt and slipped it on over my head. It was a little faded, but I didn't care. I was going to put a hoodie on over it anyway. After a few more minutes of rummaging I found my favorite purple and black striped hoodie. With an eager grin I slipped it on over my wet hair and looked at myself in the mirror.

Not bad. Definitely don't look like a gay hooker like I might've in that other outfit.

I shuddered slightly before running my fingers through my hair, styling it to look ever so slightly like it was intentionally messed up. Luckily for me my hair had a sort of natural look that I liked. I barely had to tamper with it to make it look good. Sora was the same way. We both had just naturally gravity-defying hair (at least that's what Kairi called it).

Lastly I needed shoes. I knew I had worn my solid black Converses earlier today, so they couldn't have gone too far. It only took a minute or two of tearing the room apart before I finally found them and laced them up.

After a minute or two I decided I was satisfied with my appearance. I glanced over at the alarm clock on my nightstand. It read 9:00. I had managed to get ready in a relatively short amount of time. I internally applauded myself. Now all that was left to do was to wait.

Luckily I didn't have to wait long. Almost seconds after I had sat down on my bed I heard the familiar chorus from "Shake It" coming from my phone. I smiled when Axel's name flashed on the caller ID. I had yet to decide whether or not I'd change it from "Axel the Sex God" so for the time being it remained the same. I picked it up brought the phone to my ear.

"Hello?"

_Hi there Roxie. Me and Demyx are outside so you can come down whenever you're ready._

"Alright, I'll be right down. Bye!" I responded as I hung up, not even trying to hide the excitement in my voice. Axel was waiting for me outside, and this thought alone made me dizzy with happiness. I locked the room quickly and almost sprinted to the staircase. I stomped down the stairs at a dangerously fast pace as the echoes of my forceful footsteps reverberated over and over again through the narrow stairwell.

I stepped out into the night and took a deep breath, enjoying the taste of the fresh air. I immediately spotted Axel standing about twenty feet away from me. He was wearing a black zip-up hoodie and dark blue skinny jeans. Dang those made his ass look good. His back was turned and he was shouting something in the direction of the parking lot. I couldn't help but smile when he started to wave his harms around, still shouting.

"I don't give a fuck if Zexion's not going to be there! You can't back out now when you already said you'd drive. Don't even _think_ about driving away and leaving me here- Demyx! Turn off the fucking car before I come over there and kick your ass!" Axel was yelling. I looked past him to see a small blue Honda Civic that was idling in the parking lot. From the sound of things, the guy in the driver's seat was Demyx, as that was the only car with anyone in it. I couldn't really see what he looked like from here, but before I could try for a better look my attention was drawn to Axel who had just turned around and realized I was there.

His face which had been previously scrunched into an angry scowl had now lit up into a blinding smile. Seriously, I might need sunglasses.

"Roxas!" he exclaimed. I felt butterflies erupting in my stomach. He seemed so genuinely happy to see me. Already I felt myself blushing slightly.

"Hey Axel, I'm ready," I said with a lopsided grin.

"Aww, is that all I get? No 'Oh Axel I've missed you so much, it's been absolutely unbearable!'" Axel asked in mock disappointment. He theatrically threw an arm over his eyes, mimicking my would-be disdain.

I laughed. "Dream on, lover boy."

I blinked and suddenly he was standing right in front of me, gazing down at me with those amazing bright green eyes. He placed his finger under my chin and lifted my head up towards his. I felt my breath catch in my throat.

"Do I at least get a kiss?" he purred as he slowly lowered his head. I found myself temporarily paralyzed as his face crept closer and his lips ghosted over mine. We were both brought back to reality by a loud horn resounding from the Civic in the parking lot.

"Fuck you Demyx!" Axel shouted angrily.

"If I'm not getting any, then you're not getting any!" the man within the car shouted.

I was still recovering from the intimate moment I had just been pulled from. Axel had suddenly gotten so _bold_. I mean sure he had seemingly flirted with me a lot last semester, but what's made him make a move so fast this time? What's different?

Axel had to grab my hand and gently pull me in the direction of the car so that we wouldn't be standing there all night. He chuckled. "Didn't know I was that good Roxie. Sorry to interrupt your naughty little daydream, but we should probably get going before Demyx wets himself," he said with a playful wink.

"Don't worry, you didn't interrupt anything," I added slyly. "I was just trying to remember if I had locked my room before I left."

"Ouch babe, that hurt," he said while clutching his chest. "I was hoping maybe you daydream about me as much as I seem to about you."

Stupid Axel and his stupid comments making this stupid blush creep onto my face. I'm certain my face will just stay permanently red one of these days.

We reached the parking lot and Axel opened the back door for me to climb in. What a gentleman. As he climbed into the front passenger's seat, the guy in the driver's seat turned around and held out his hand. He had lovely eyes; they were a sort of teal color, a dark mix of blue and green. He had dirty blonde hair which he had styled rather unusually into a sort of mohawk-mullet hybrid.

"Hi, I'm Demyx!" he said with a warm grin. "You're Roxas, I know. Axel won't shut up about you."

I blushed and Axel coughed, obviously embarrassed. "Oh fuck you Dem. You talk about your boy-toy twice as much."

"Do not!" Demyx retorted and stuck out his tongue at Axel, who repeated the gesture. I laughed at the two of them. Axel turned around with a smile.

"Don't mind him, he always acts this immature. You get used to it after a while."

"Axel you're so mean!" Demyx whined as he locked the doors and sped out of the parking lot.

The two of them continued to bicker and I found myself tuning them out as I gazed out my window at the blurs of light rushing past us. Demyx was probably driving twenty miles over the speed limit right now. Oh well, at least he hadn't hit anything yet.

"So, about how far away is this place?" I asked curiously, bringing them out of their argument.

"We'll be there in about fifteen or twenty minutes, but I've gotten there in ten," Demyx responded with a devious glint in his eyes. I saw him grin maliciously in the rearview mirror.

"Now now Dem, we don't want little Roxie getting scared stiff _before_ we introduce him to all the weirdoes we call friends. That'll be traumatizing enough," Axel said from the front seat. "Better stick relatively close to the speed limit tonight."

"Oh fine," Demyx said remorsefully.

Axel turned around in his seat again to face me, his face brightened by his wide smile. "So tell me Roxas, what've you been doing these past few days? Nothing _naughty_ I hope?"

I could hear the double meaning in his words. I made sure my facial expression remained neutral as I contemplated what to say next.

"Because if that's the case I'd be hurt that you didn't invite me along," Axel added.

"Geez Axel you sound like such a creeper. You're going to scare him away," Demyx said to his friend as he zipped in and out of lanes, receiving many angry horns and gestures.

"No way man, we're totally cool. I just know Roxie dreams about me all the time. Right, Roxie?" Axel asked me, wiggling his eyebrows.

"Yeah, they're nightmares," I answered, shuddering dramatically for effect. Demyx roared with laughter.

"I like this kid!" he said after he had calmed down some. Axel just shrugged.

"Hey, at least he admitted it," he said with a smile as he turned back around and lazily placed his arms behind his head.

After about twenty more minutes of Demyx weaving through traffic and Axel saying things he shouldn't, we pulled up in front of someone's house. Already there were a bunch of cars there, and we could see various people talking and laughing inside.

"Alright we made it," Demyx said as he unbuckled himself.

"It's a wonder we're still alive with you driving the way you do," Axel teased his friend.

"Hey, next time you can just walk," Demyx retorted.

"Aww Demy you don't mean that," Axel whined as he got out of the car.

I reached down to unbuckle myself and mentally prepared myself for whatever could happen throughout the course of the night. I turned towards my door and found it already open, a pale hand being held in front of me.

"C'mon Roxas, we don't have all night," Axel chided playfully. With a smirk I took his hand and stepped out of the car. As we walked towards the front door I couldn't help but smile. Axel hadn't let go of my hand.


	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: Unfortunately I have yet to claim ownership over Kingdom Hearts. Don't worry, they will all be mine soon enough...

Author's Note: Well, here's chapter six everyone! I'm loving the positive feedback, it really brightens my day! As I mentioned in the last chapter, there is no real rhyme or reason to the frequency in which i update, so don't get too hung up on it please. This story is one that is simply fueled one chapter at a time, so I just write whenever I feel like writing. Please don't be sad if I don't update as frequently as I have before! Alright? Good! Enjoy this newest chapter!

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I could already hear the music that was resonating from the small, white house. I wasn't sure what part of town we were in (or if we were still even in the same city). Demyx had been driving a little too fast for me to really pay attention to where we were going. Besides, I had been a little, er, distracted by the smoking hot redhead who had been sitting in front of me.

And said redhead was now holding my hand and leading me towards the packed building we had only recently approached. Sure, I'd been to my fair share of parties, but for some reason I felt myself feeling slightly nervous as we walked through the front door. I wasn't sure what to expect, and it had been so long since I had gone out partying anyway.

So long ago, but sometimes it seemed like it was just yesterday…

"Roxas? Hey, Roxie snap out of it!" I heard Axel say as my eyes refocused on his hand waving frantically in front of my face. Whoops, I guess I zoned out again. I feel like I've been doing that a lot lately.

"Sorry," I muttered. Axel let out an exasperated sigh, but smiled regardless.

"I was just asking you if you wanted me to grab you a beer outta the fridge," he repeated. I nodded, thinking alcohol was just what I needed to loosen me up a little right now. I was feeling way too tense for this laid-back, party setting. Axel nodded and turned around to weave through numerous other party-goers as he made his way towards the kitchen.

"Roxaaaaaas!"

I turned my head and couldn't help but laugh a little. Demyx was already buzzed and we'd been here for what, five minutes? I hoped he wouldn't be the one driving us back afterwards.

"This is Roxas, Zexy. He's Axel's little boy-toy. Isn't he cute?" Demyx cooed to the man next to him.

I quirked an eyebrow. This guy certainly didn't look like your typical college partygoer. Demyx had his arm slung over the shoulders of a solemn looking, slate-haired man whose right eye was covered with a sheet of hair. He didn't look like he was having fun at all, but Demyx didn't seem to get the hint as he continued to chat the stiff-looking boy's ear off and laugh loudly.

"Hey Zexion, I didn't think I'd see you tonight! Dem told me you couldn't come."

I looked to my right to see that Axel had returned with two beers in hand. He held one out to me as he continued looking at the blue-haired man whom he had just addressed.

Demyx pouted as he answered, "That was just Larxene playing a mean trick. She told me he wouldn't be here just to upset me."

Axel paled. "You mean Larxene's here?"

"Unfortunately," Zexion answered. Honestly, I was a little surprised that the guy spoke. He didn't seem like one who was much for conversation, which was interesting considering the fact that he seemed to have a pretty good relationship with Demyx who never seemed to shut his mouth.

Axel made a noise that was clearly one of disgust. He obviously did not want to see this Larxene person. My curiosity got the best of me, "Who's Larxene?" I asked. Immediately three sets of eyes looked at me, surprised to hear me speak up maybe.

"She's Axel's crazy ex-girlfriend," Demyx responded curtly. "She looooves making other people miserable, maybe to make up for how you broke her heart, Ax."

Axel rolled his eyes, "Please. She doesn't have a heart."

Demyx laughed loudly and the corners of Zexion's mouth seemed to turn up a little.

"Well you better hope she doesn't see you here, though I doubt that's possible. Marly's house is fucking tiny. Keep an eye on Roxie though, if she finds out he's with you she's likely to make his life a living hell," Demyx responded after he had quieted some.

I gulped. I didn't know who this crazy bitch was, but I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a little frightened by this. I felt a long arm wrap around my shoulders as I was pulled against a warm body. I looked up to see that Axel had pulled me close to him with a playful smirk lighting up his face.

"Don't worry Roxie, I'll protect you from the mean ol' witch," he said with a wink as he looked down at me.

I smiled. "Thanks, but I'm a little worried that I might need some protecting from you."

Axel feigned shock as he pointed at himself, "Me? Now why on earth would you say something so unkind Roxas?" I didn't miss the devious glint in his eyes that appeared as he finished this sentence. It sent shivers down my spine.

Demyx smiled lazily as he answered the question that had been directed at me. It was obvious he couldn't hold his liquor very well, as he was already slurring his speech. "Cuz you look like you wanna molest him, Ax. I swear if I see you undressing him with your eyes one more time I'm gonna puke."

Zexion looked at his friend with a concerned expression, "I'm worried you might just puke anyways. C'mon, let's go sit down." He placed an arm around Demyx's waist and led him over to the sofa.

"Aww, my Zexy's so sweet to me," Demyx slurred as he was gently placed on the sofa. It might've been my eyes playing tricks on me, but I could've sworn I saw Zexion's cheeks turn a little pink. Heh. It looked like the stern-looking fellow had a soft spot for the crazy musician.

I felt a tug on my sleeve as I looked up. Axel was nodding in the direction of the kitchen. "C'mon Roxas, let's get something a little stronger to drink."

I nodded. I had finished the can of beer he had handed me a long time ago. I had built up quite an alcohol tolerance over the years, no doubt from my wild habits back in high school. I hadn't gone partying in ages though, but it looked like there were a few things I had retained from my previous lifestyle.

I followed Axel into the kitchen. I found it hard to not let my eyes greedily wander his entire body. I had missed seeing him, that's for sure, and now that he was right in front of me it was taking a lot for me to not just jump him right then and there. He walked over to where an assorted collection of bottles was sitting, surrounded by red plastic cups. I watched him pick up a bottle of Bacardi as he poured two ridiculously large shots into two separate cups. I'd definitely be feeling something after this one. He smirked as he handed me one of them.

"What should we drink to?" Axel asked me.

"Er, I don't know," I responded. Seriously, I had no idea. I was thinking that I just wanted to down this shot and really get the party started.

"Hmm, how about to the two of us somehow meeting up again?" Axel asked.

"Sure, sounds good," I added quickly. I was feeling impatient.

"Alright, to the twisted mind of fate which brought the two us together again in a kinky little sex shop!" Axel exclaimed as he raised his cup and drank the whole thing in one gulp. I was glaring daggers at him, and I'm sure he knew it. Angrily I took my shot and let the liquid warm my throat as it traveled through my body. Already I felt myself feeling slightly more relaxed. I looked up at Axel and gave him a scowl for that last comment, but he seemed unfazed. He flashed a wild grin my way and added; "Now we're getting somewhere."

I laughed, not noticing that Axel had already poured a couple more extremely large shots until he forced a cup into my hand. I looked up at him as he downed his and started to walk towards the living room. He set his empty cup down on a nearby end table and turned around with his lips curled in the sexiest, most evil smirk I had ever seen in my entire life. His eyes were glued to mine, as he curled one finger back and forth, beckoning me to him. I rolled my eyes at him as I followed, but I could feel my insides doing flips. Holy fuck, nobody should be allowed to be that sexy. Suddenly it felt like someone had just turned up the heat. I felt like I had begun to sweat, but was it due to the alcohol or the fiery redhead who was playing the game of seduction a little too well? I slipped my hoodie off and threw it on the back of some random chair. I decided I'd get it later, maybe when it wasn't so hot. Axel raised an eyebrow, devilish grin still in place as I continued over to him.

I followed Axel over to the sofa where he decided to sit. I glanced over to see Demyx lying with his head in Zexion's lap as the latter ran his slender fingers through the other's hair. If I hadn't been so buzzed I probably would have been a little shocked. These two definitely had something going on, and they were just about as different as any two people could possibly be. I was, however, too preoccupied with the insanely attractive redhead whose green eyes were drawing me closer. Axel had his back against the armrest, legs stretched out across the length of the sofa. I was about to push his ridiculously long legs out of the way and sit down when I felt long arms grab my waist as I was pulled up into Axel's lap. He breathed out a sigh of contentment, and I could smell the alcohol on his breath. How much more had he drunk when I wasn't looking? I felt my thoughts getting fuzzy as he pulled me to him. Embarrassed, I pushed my hands out in front of me and supported myself on his chest. He didn't seem to be affected by my sudden movement as all. Axel simply removed his hands from my hips and slowly let them trail up my body, teasing me as he allowed his slender fingers to draw meaningless patters across my body as they continued their journey down my arms until they circled around my wrists. A violent shudder ripped through my body, and I knew he had seen it. I was undeniably turned on by what was happening right now. Axel had not torn his piercing green gaze from my face since he'd pulled me into his lap, and I found myself unable to look away from him as well. I had completely forgotten that we weren't the only two people in the room as my world seemed to swim around me. The only clear object in my line of vision was that flawless face looking at me so _hungrily_ as I straddled his hips.

I bit my lip, certain that some very unwelcome noises might drift out of my mouth if I didn't control myself. Axel's fingers were now sensually tracing patterns across my wrists. My god, he was driving me absolutely crazy. I felt what was left of my resolve slowly melt away as he cautiously pulled me closer and closer. One of his hands left my wrist as it once again journeyed over my arm and over my shoulder. He allowed it to linger for a moment as it caressed my throat before bringing it up towards my face. I felt his thumb softly kneading my cheek as his fingers gently played with the hair that had fallen in my face. I felt as if I had stopped breathing. His hand cautiously moved to the back of my head as he tangled his fingers in my hair and began to pull my head down towards his.

I had been completely overcome with desire. My body seemed to be acting on its own now, as it had been for the past few minutes. Maybe it was the alcohol dulling my senses. Whatever it was, I didn't want it to stop. Effortlessly, Axel brought my face down to his as he passionately captured my lips in a fiery kiss. He lifted his other hand up to join its partner in running fingers through my hair. It felt fantastic. I felt myself kissing back, desperately clinging to the front of his shirt. I had wanted this for so long, and now I was happily drowning – no, burning; burning in sweet, sweet desire.

I gasped as his teeth bit ever so slightly on my bottom lip, and this was just the opportunity Axel had been waiting for. I felt his tongue slide into my mouth as he deepened this kiss. I moaned into his mouth, allowing my hands to roam across his broad chest. I didn't care that we were in a room full of people, the things that he was doing to me were driving me absolutely crazy, and I didn't want them to stop.

"Well well well, when did you turn into such a pedophile Axel baby?" an annoyingly sweet voice sang out. The venom dripping from the girl's voice was undeniably thick. I sat up quickly and pushed myself off of Axel, slightly embarrassed by just how public our actions had been. I wiped my mouth and looked up to see a thin blonde with terrifying green eyes. They were a much darker shade of green than Axel's, but they were just as distinct. The cruel gaze she seemed to be drilling into me was petrifying. Her short hair was slicked back, save for two longer strands which were slightly elevated from the rest of her hair. It almost looked like she had two antennae.

"Larxene," was all Axel said as he repositioned himself, sitting up straighter, but continuing to lean against the armrest.

So this was Larxene. She certainly did give off that "bitch vibe" that I imagined she might. What Axel saw in her, I had no idea. Sure, she might be pretty to look at, but how anyone could deal with that poisonous attitude was beyond me.

"I was hoping you'd be here darling, although I was a little surprised to see you playing tonsil hockey with some kindergartener," she responded nastily. I returned her glare with equal intensity. This bitch was dangerously close to crossing the line.

"Well I'm afraid that seeing you here may have just ruined my night. C'mon Roxas, let's go somewhere else. It's a little too loud in here anyway," Axel said calmly, although the underlying hatred was apparent when he addressed Larxene. He rose from the couch grabbed my hand as he pulled me towards the back porch. I dared not turn around, but I could imagine that Larxene was furiously glaring daggers at the two of us.

Once we had made it outside, Axel began fumbling through his pockets. After a second or two he whipped out a lighter and a pack of cigarettes. He pulled one out and shoved it between his lips as he leaned back against the outside wall.

"You want one?"

I blinked. It took me a moment to understand that he was talking to me. I just shook my head. "I don't smoke," I replied. Axel simply shrugged.

I watched him as he brought the small red lighter up to the end of the cigarette. I heard the familiar flick of metal as the lighter flashed to life, as small flame emerging from its tip. The light being given off from the tiny flame caused shadows to dance across Axel's angular features. I gazed in awe at how beautiful the fire seemed to make his face look; shrouded in darkness while flashing such dazzling hints of beauty. It had only lasted for a few seconds, but when the flame went out I felt like I had been staring at him for hours. Now the only light came from the small red embers burning at the end of the cigarette. Axel tilted his head back and let out a long sigh as the smoke curled out from between his lips. I couldn't tear my eyes away. I had always considered smoking to be disgusting. It stained your teeth, turned your lungs black, and sent you into an early grave, but somehow Axel made it look so… _beautiful_.

The two of us just sat there for a moment, each lost in our own thoughts. After a few minutes Axel broke the silence.

"Sorry about her," he said.

"Don't worry about it," I responded. "I know how crazy exes can be." Boy did I know.

He simply chuckled and nodded, taking a long drag before blowing the smoke through his lips again and watching it curl up into the night sky. Neither of us said anything for a long while. Axel just continued to suck away at his cigarette and I continued to watch him, thoughts torn between watching this amazing creature and past memories of my own experiences with a crazy ex. I shivered. Axel's head snapped to face me almost instantly. "You cold?" he asked gently.

I was about to shake my head, when I realized I was in fact feeling a little cold now that we had been outside for so long. I nodded my head instead and he stood up straight. I watched him drop the butt of the finished cigarette onto the concrete and grind it into oblivion. "Let's go back inside then," he added as he slowly guided me toward the door.

The two of us walked back inside and I shivered, unused to the warmer temperature. I rubbed my arms furiously, trying to warm myself. Axel chuckled next to me. I stiffened when he brought his lips to my ear. "I know a few things that we could do to warm you up Roxie," he purred. I could smell the smoke on his breath, but for once I didn't find it repulsive; I found it quite arousing. I felt a blush creep slowly across my cheeks. Did he want to pick up where we had left off earlier on the sofa?

Suddenly Axel was poking me in the side. "Thinking naughty thoughts Roxie? I was just gonna say we grab ourselves a few more drinks!"

I had been thinking naughty thoughts. Embarrassed, I glared at him and tried my best to redeem myself. "I'm the naughty one? Who's the one who pulled me into his lap earlier, huh?" I folded my arms over my chest, doing my best to feign anger, but I seemed to be failing miserably. Axel simply chuckled before hooking his fingers through my belt loops and pulling me to him. I tried my best to remain calm, which was extremely difficult as I was now pressed up against the object of my desire. I could feel my face heating up rapidly. Being with Axel made me feel like I was burning; burning away as these sweet flames of pleasure licked away at me and erased all coherent thought from my mind. Being around him made me think of only one thing: desire.

"Oh, but you seemed to be enjoying the attention Roxas. I must say, I just wanted to include myself in all of these naughty things you seem to be doing by yourself," he whispered against my ear before nibbling on it slightly. I worked hard to stifle the moan that was rising in my throat. "Looking at naughty things in a sex shop," he breathed out as his lips trailed down from my ear to my jaw line. I felt myself release a breath I hadn't realized I'd been holding as his lips parted and placed a few open-mouthed kisses across my skin. "Doing naughty things on the phone," he growled as his lips found my neck and began to bite and suck at the tender skin there. I did nothing to stop the shaky moan that slipped between my lips as I brought my trembling hands up to his hair, tangling my fingers in his bright red locks and enjoying every minute of it.

"Oh, get a room you two," I heard Demyx laugh from the other room. Axel made a disappointed noise against my throat before pulling away and tossing an aggravated look towards the sofa where Demyx was now sitting alone.

"Where'd your boyfriend run off to?" Axel asked, making Demyx blush profusely.

"He's not my boyfriend Axel, you know that! Zexy's just in the bathroom!" Demyx angrily retorted, made less intimidating by the flustered look on his face.

Axel simply waved his hand, not seeming to give a damn. "Sure, sure. Whatever you two wanna call it," he added before plopping down on the couch. He held his hand out to me, insinuating that I come sit with him. There was no way I could resist that smile on his face, so I took the bait. I took his hand and he immediately pulled me down into his lap. I blushed as he pulled me closer and snaked his arms around me from behind before resting his chin on top of my head and sighing happily.

Demyx pretended to gag. "Ugh, you two need to chill. There's a little too much PDA going on for my stomach to handle."

"C'mon Dem, there are tons of people making out in here," Axel responded.

"Yeah, but you're my best friend, Ax. It makes it weird," Demyx replied.

Axel laughed. "Whatever."

I could feel his breath blowing a few strands of hair on top of my head. It felt nice. Aside from the rude intrusion made my Larxene earlier, this night had actually gone pretty well. She had been a bit of a buzz kill, but maybe I didn't need the alcohol to help me relax. Axel seemed to be doing a pretty good job of making me feel good. I smiled and closed my eyes as I leaned back against my favorite redhead.

The three of us looked up as Zexion walked back into the room (well, I'm assuming Axel looked because he's not exactly in my line of vision). He sat down between Demyx and the armrest, and the musician happily scooted closer to the slate-haired man.

Axel snorted. "And you try to tell me there's not something going on between you two."

Demyx blushed, but much to my surprise Zexion actually _laughed_. It was a nice sound, don't get me wrong, but it was completely unexpected. "I'll leave that one for you to figure out on your own, Axel," Zexion chided playfully as he ran his fingers through Demyx's hair.

"I hope you four aren't doing anything too naughty on my couch," a voice sang out over the dull roar of the rest of the partygoers. A tall pink-haired man stepped into my line of vision. I'm totally serious; this guy's hair was _pink._ Not red, _pink_.

"Don't worry Marly, we're being good. Might wanna keep an eye on Axel though," Demyx responded. He had returned to his original position with his head in Zexion's lap.

"Hey, I'm behaving myself quite well considering what a cute piece of ass I have in my lap right now," Axel responded defensively. I blushed. Suddenly it was getting hot in here again.

The pink-haired man looked me up and down, nodding in approval. "That's some good eye-candy you've got there Axel, I won't lie."

Immediately I felt Axel's grip tighten around my waist. "Don't even think about it fruitcake. He's mine," Axel growled.

The "fruitcake" laughed and raised his hands in surrender. "Don't worry; I wouldn't want to get in a fight with you over some guy Axel. He's all yours."

I was feeling slightly offended. These two guys were arguing over me like I was some sort of object to be bought and sold. I huffed and folded my arms in annoyance.

"C'mon you guys don't talk about Roxas like he's some piece of meat. Roxas, this is Marluxia. This is his house. He likes flowers and he's a flaming homo," Demyx said from Zexion's lap.

Marluxia laughed. "Flaming's usually the word I use with Axel. It seems to fit him better."

"Yeah yeah, everyone's a comedian," Axel said bitterly. "Don't you have other guests you need to greet or some shit?"

"Alright I get the hint; I'll leave you lovebirds alone. Later," Marluxia said with a wave as he disappeared into one of the many crowds scattered about the house.

Axel sighed, mood obviously lighter with Marluxia gone. "So you guys wanna take another shot or are we calling it quits?"

Demyx shot up from Zexion's lap, startling him. "No way are we even close to calling it quits! C'mon you guys!" he shouted as he dragged a slightly reluctant Zexion back into the kitchen.

I heard Axel chuckle as he nuzzled his face deeper into my hair. "Whaddya say Roxie, wanna get trashed?"

I laughed, thinking about how to answer. "I'm a little worried about what you might do to me with any more alcohol in your system. Promise you won't molest me?"

I felt him unhook his arms from around my middle as he slowly pushed me up from the sofa. I looked up at him with a playful smile, still waiting to hear his answer. Axel reached down and ruffled my hair as he stated with a smirk, "I'm not making any promises."


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: Sadly, I still do not own Kindom Hearts. If I did, things would be slightly different. ;D

Author's Note: Wow, I can't believe how well this has been going. I really really appreciate all of the lovely feedback I've been getting, as well as the warm fuzzy feeling I get each time someone adds my story to their alerts or favorites list. You guys are too sweet! I'm always so self-conscious when I post a new chapter; it's like sending my baby out into the world to face harsh reality and the opinions of others. *sniff* Well, I hope that you guys like this newest chapter!

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Hmm. Now I wasn't sure exactly how many shots I had taken to get me into this bedroom. My mind was swimming as I desperately tried to cling onto my thoughts; they just seemed to slip and slide away from my grasp. I knew it wasn't after the first shot (well, the first shot of 'round two'). Demyx, who had already been pretty smashed, had started singing his own version of "Circus" by Britney Spears. Needless to say, it was entertaining as hell. Now don't misunderstand, normally Demyx is a phenomenal singer. I mean, he's a music major, he's got to have some sort of grasp on how to carry a tune; but under the influence of four shots of vodka and a little Jose Cuervo, things were certainly different. I was impressed (well, at least I think I would be if I wasn't so totally out of it) by how loose Zexion seemed to get around Demyx. The two of them seemed to balance each other out… sort of. Axel and I had been laughing our asses off at Demyx, especially when he decided to throw in some crazy dance moves to "enhance" his performance. Sure, Zexion had been laughing too, but it was more of an amused chuckle. It wasn't until Demyx tried to get up onto the kitchen table and really belt it out did any of us even try to stop him. Zexion rushed forward and wrapped his arms around his waist in an attempt to restrain him. He wasn't doing a very good job though, as he was laughing so hard that tears were beginning to form in the corners of his eyes. Luckily Demyx didn't hurt himself, as he proceeded to fall limp into Zexion's waiting arms. That guy seriously could not hold his alcohol.

So it wasn't the first shot; that was when Demyx was out cold. Now, the second one was a different story.

Now it must be said, the shots I'm referring to are probably not what one normally thinks of. No, these are "Axel shots," meaning they're about three times as much as you'd normally get because the bastard drinks like an alcoholic. Now that we were on round two I could feel the room start spinning a little sooner than I had the first time. The drinks I'd had earlier still hadn't worn completely off and now I was pouring more of the burning liquid down my throat. I watched Axel finish the shot he had just poured himself before downing my own. I coughed slightly as I felt myself feeling even more warm and relaxed.

"Shit Roxas, you aren't the lightweight I pegged you for," Axel said with a laugh. I peered up at him from underneath my bangs as I allowed a lazy smirk to creep across my features. I didn't miss the way his eyes widened.

"Aww, were you hoping I'd be totally gone after one drink so you could just have your way with me, is that it?" I said with faux innocence. Hey, Axel isn't the only one who knows how to push people's buttons.

That rock-solid composure which had been cracked ever so slightly was now back in full force. Axel took a step forward, closing the already narrow distance between our bodies as we stood together in the kitchen. His wicked smile was back and I could see a definite change in the way his eyes seemed to stare down at me. I took a step back, more as a reflex rather than an actual desire to move, and found my back pressed against the wall. Those smoldering green eyes never tore themselves from my gaze as Axel came even closer and placed his hands on either side of my head. He leaned his face down until his lips were barely grazing against my ear as he whispered, "Clever boy, thinks he's got me all figured out. As tempting as your guess may sound, I believe these things are much better when the desire is… mutual." With that last word I felt his hot breath ghost against my skin as he exhaled. Alcohol or no alcohol, I wanted him and I wanted him _badly_. As if he had been reading my mind, his hands grabbed at me almost exactly as mine reached for him. With a grunt I felt myself being pushed roughly into the wall as Axel's hands hungrily roamed across my body. He was everywhere all at once; I could barely concentrate on what was happening to me. All I know is that it felt fantastic. My hands were in his hair again, I'm assuming I put them there. I can't even really tell what I'm doing anymore. My body seems to have broken completely free of my mind, acting on its own desires rather than any rational thought that could possibly be left inside of my head; and I find myself to be absolutely positively okay with that.

Multitasking had become beyond impossible for me, and it's even hard to concentrate on multiple sensations at the same time. My fingers are tangled in wild red locks. Passionate hands greedily groped and grabbed at every inch of my body. Our tongues were locked in a fiery battle; all somehow happening simultaneously. Any thought that had anything to do with anything that wasn't Axel had been completely erased from my mind. I was burning. He was everywhere; and I wanted more.

Now I think I understand how I ended up in some bedroom I didn't recognize. The two of us had been sinking deeper and deeper into our own little world of desire; neither choosing to leave and therefore neither considering the fact that they were in a room that was anything but private. My mind was a cloudy haze as I stumbled over thoughts and sensations, trying to get a firm grip on what was happening to me; but at the same time loving how helpless I felt. Axel was the dominant one, he was running the show. I loved how powerful he seemed to feel to me when he enveloped me completely. His tall figure towered over me as his long arms formed a cage that protected me from the outside world. I was blissfully trapped inside of his arms as he pressed me harder into the wall. Whether it was ignorance or just simply not caring, I hadn't completely realized how obviously aroused I had become. Blood was rushing to a certain lower part of my anatomy and I could feel myself feeling light-headed. Reason was gone. Desire was king. I lifted one of my legs and wrapped it around Axel's waist, now only being held up by his body which was pressed right up against my own. As if woken from a trance, Axel stopped and looked down at me with a slightly surprised look, eyes still clouded with lust.

"Roxas–," he panted. "We should take this somewhere a little more private." I nodded. I had slightly come back from the brink of simply demanding he take me right there against the kitchen wall. I knew that would probably be something I'd regret doing. Well, I'd regret that it had been so public. He took my hand, gently, but I could feel the tension that was coursing through his entire body. Quickly, but not too quickly, he led me out of the kitchen and through the hallway we had seen when we first entered the house. I knew he didn't want to make a scene, but in the state I was in I seriously just wanted to sprint to wherever the hell we were going. I guess it's a good thing he was the one leading the way. I didn't stop to look around at who may be watching us go by, I didn't think about what people would say or what they would think, all that filled my mind was clinging to the warm hand that guided me and watching the back of the figure in front of me. Honestly I probably couldn't focus on much else anyway with as much booze as I had in my system.

We rounded a corner, took a flight of stairs, and were met with a hallway of closed doors. I found myself being pulled into the closest one on the left side. And apparently that is how I ended up right here, with this domineering figure looming over me. I found myself lying flat on my back with my feet still dangling off of the bed that had seemingly conveniently appeared underneath me. Axel slowly crawled on top of me, knees on either side of my waist, as he stared down at me.

"Roxas," he breathed, "I want you so bad right now, but if you don't want this then you better say something now, because I honestly don't know if I'm gonna be able to stop again." I could hear the strain in his voice as he said these words to me, and even in my inebriated state I could understand the compassion that came with these words. He was giving me an option, an out. I didn't _have_ to do this. Had I not been so goddamn horny, I might've cried.

I reached a hand up to cup his cheek, stroking one of the teardrop tattoos that I had wanted to touch for so long. I slid my hand behind his head as I pulled him down towards me until his face was barely an inch from mine. "Axel," I sighed. "Take me."

With a noise that sounded almost like a growl, Axel crushed his lips to mine once more. His fingers circled my wrists again, pinning them to the surface beneath me. I kissed back with as much fervor as I could muster, trying to convey just how much I wanted him with such a simple action. I barely noticed that he had freed my hands until I felt his slender fingers sliding up my stomach, leaving trails of fire across my skin. Axel slid my shirt farther up my chest, hands greedily touching each and every inch of skin they came into contact with. I felt myself arching my back slightly, leaning into his touch. Suddenly I realized how uncomfortable my shirt seemed to have gotten, and I sat up with the intention of taking it off completely. As I pulled it up and proceeded to release my head from its prison, I let out a sharp gasp as I felt a tongue trailing across my newly bare skin.

Axel reached a hand around and pulled me to him as he sat up on his knees. Now in a sitting position, I reached my arms around his neck and pulled him closer as I was brought nearer to him by the hand on the small of my back. I didn't bother trying to restrain the moans as the erupted from my throat as that expert tongue tasted every muscle on my chest. My hands clenched in his hair when I felt one of my nipples enveloped in a hot, moist cavern. Axel's tongue continued to drive me crazy and I barely noticed that his other hand had been making quick work of the button on my jeans.

I let out a whimper when I felt Axel's tongue cease its ministrations, but it was soon followed by a surprised gasp when I was pushed onto my back again as my jeans were swiftly pulled off of my legs. Had I been able to fully register everything that was going on, I probably would have been extremely impressed. My jeans were fucking _tight_. I have no clue how Axel got them off so fast, I mean, even I can't get them off that fast. But whatever. I may not have been able to realize the fact that Axel was amazing at removing pants, but I did realize that I was now in my boxers and Axel still had all of his clothes on for some reason. Well, minus the hoodie. I hadn't noticed before, but it seemed to have disappeared over the course of the night. Of course, all this meant right now was less clothing for me to remove. I tugged impatiently at the bottom of the plain white v-neck that Axel had on. He must have been feeling even more impatient than I had because rather than have me take it off he just quickly pulled it over his head himself. Again, these are all things that I probably would have laughed at or found interesting had I been thinking with a different head, but you know how it goes.

I couldn't help but stare once Axel's shirt was gone. I had always fantasized about how he must look shirtless but boy was the real deal better. Axel watched with an amused smirk as I hungrily took in every inch of his upper body.

"Like what you see, Roxie?" he asked with a confident smugness. He leaned down and pressed his body against mine; skin against skin. I was feeling dizzy from the contact. "Don't worry, it gets better," Axel added before trailing his tongue over my ear. I shivered. He really knew what got me. He sat up again and looked me over, playful glint dancing in his eyes. Noticing that we were still pretty much only using the bottom half of the bed, I propped myself up and began to scoot backwards. I tried the sultriest smirk I could muster, doing my best to mimic the effects that Axel usually had on me, as I crept slowly back towards the pillows. Whatever I was doing seemed to be working, as the sexy redhead was slowly crawling after me, looking like a cat ready to pounce. As I reached the end of the bed I felt my back press against the wall, forcing my body into a sitting position. Axel came forward and trapped me against the wall, firmly pressing his chest against mine as he captured my lips again. I was vaguely aware that we were slowly sliding down from the wall, ultimately ending with Axel leaning over me as I lay flat on my back.

Staring up through half-lidded eyes, I saw him grin as he said; "Now this is where the real fun begins, Rox." His lips attacked mine with renewed fervor as his hands now journeyed across the contours of my body. I felt him grab at my shoulders, my arms, my ass, pretty much anything he could touch. Axel's aggressiveness was driving my crazy and I could barely contain the whimpers and moans that seemed to spill from my lips. I found myself panting as his fingers began to tease my nipples again.

"Axel–," I panted; unable to form any real sentences. I just kept saying his name, over and over again. His lips had traveled to the base of my throat, leaving a series of bites and marks along the length of my neck. I was marked. I was _his_. I felt myself shudder with pleasure at such a thought. I hadn't realized that his hands were now journeying towards the one destination they had yet to explore. I gasped in surprise as I felt his fingers toying with the waistband of my boxers.

"Shh, it's okay Roxas," he murmured against my skin as his hands slowly slid inside and pushed my last remaining clothing item farther and farther down my legs. I closed my eyes, feeling slightly embarrassed. With a light toss, they had fallen to the floor along with everything else that I had been wearing. Opening one eye, I immediately found myself beginning to blush even harder. Axel's eyes were wandering up and down my body, lingering in certain areas, mostly upon my painfully erect cock. I felt so _exposed_. I squirmed, lowering my hands in a half-assed attempt to cover myself up. Immediately Axel grabbed my wrists and pinned them above my head.

"Don't hide," was all he said. "I want to see you. All of you."

"Axel please," I breathed, barely louder than a whisper. His eyes came up to meet mine, and for what seemed like an eternity we were simply trapped in each other's gaze. Suddenly the wildfire was back, fingers trailing heat as they criss-crossed across my stomach. My back arched unexpectedly when Axel's fingers had grazed along the side of my cock. He took it firmly in his hand and began to stroke, alternating between gentle caresses and hungry thrusts. I was clinging to his shoulders, fingernails leaving small crescent-shaped indentations along the backs of his arms as he continued to plague me with this sweet, sweet torture.

I heard the familiar sound of a zipper and I propped myself up on my elbows. I looked down to see that Axel was finally relieving himself of his bottoms. As he slid out of his dark skinny jeans, my jaw dropped. Someone had decided not to wear underwear today. Axel raised an eyebrow as he looked at me, obviously amused by my facial expression. I couldn't tear my eyes away from him, he was fully erect too. Had I made him feel that way? Did I get him _that_ turned on? Axel leaned forward to bite at my bottom lip affectionately. "Told you it'd get better, Rox," he said with a laugh as he pushed me back down onto the bed.

My breath caught in my throat as Axel reached for the bedside table. He pulled out a small bottle whose label I couldn't read. I watched, breathing heavily, as he squirted some of the substance from inside the bottle onto his hands. He looked up at me and gave an apologetic smile, "This is gonna feel a little weird at first Roxie baby, but I promise it'll get better."

I gasped when I felt one of his coated fingers enter me. I'm not gonna lie, it felt downright uncomfortable. Axel leaned over me and pressed his lips to my neck as he cooed, "Shh, Roxas just relax." He trailed gentle kisses across my neck and I slowly felt myself beginning to adjust to the feeling. Suddenly a second finger had joined the previous one and I began to tense up again. Now it was slightly painful. Axel continued to softly kiss my neck and I focused on that in an attempt to distract myself from the unusual sensations of his fingers gently probing and moving inside of me. I was a little worried that this wasn't gonna turn out so well when suddenly I felt his fingers graze against something so deep inside of me, I hardly knew it existed. I nearly screamed as I threw my head back in unmistakable pleasure. Axel's lips curled upwards into a smirk as they remained pressed against my throat. He pulled himself up off of me and I watched as he poured a generous amount of the lubricant onto his hands and proceeded to coat his cock with it. As he positioned himself at my entrance, I was a little tense. Despite the haze brought on by the alcohol and the lust, I was feeling slightly anxious. Without warning Axel slowly began to slide into me. I heard him hiss from the contact.

"God Roxas, you're so fucking tight," he said, lust dripping from each syllable. I whimpered as he pushed in farther. This was definitely more painful than with his fingers. Slowly, slowly, he continued, constantly checking to see if I was alright. Every time I nodded and kept my mouth shut, concerned that a cry of pain may escape from my lips if I opened them. Tears were forming at the corners of my eyes as he became fully engulfed, and I felt Axel lean down and kiss the moisture from my eyes. The two of us were panting heavily, unused to this new contact. I was slowly getting used to the feeling, now becoming more aware of just how close we really were right now. It was an indescribable feeling, being whole. I wanted it to last forever, but at the same time…

"Axel–" I gasped. He looked down at me; sweat drops beading on his forehead. He smiled.

"You okay, Rox?"

I met his eyes once more and said simply, "Move."

Whether he knew that I was completely and totally positive or he just couldn't wait any longer, Axel began to move without hesitation. He slid out just far enough so that only the head of his cock was still inside of me, before slamming back in. He let out a long groan as I let out a cry mixed between pleasure and pain. Axel's thrusts remained slow, and I could tell it was killing him. Finally the pain seemed to recede until it was primarily pleasure that I felt with each stroke. I found myself meeting the thrusts, wrapping my legs around Axel's waist to angle myself better. Incoherent words and moans were falling from my lips as I succumbed to the sensations. Axel's lips were frantically moving from my neck to my chest, and then back to my own lips; kissing and biting and sucking in an erratic pattern. As we continued, faster and faster, all that existed were our bodies. I could feel every inch of him as he pounded deeper inside of me. I screamed as I once again felt that one sacred spot deep inside of me as it was assaulted. I writhed and moaned as Axel continuously drilled into me, heavy breathing matching my own. I could feel a slow warmth pooling deep inside of me, and I knew I was close.

"A-Axel, I think I'm gonna–," was all I could manage to say. It was a wonder I could even say that much. I felt his hand come down between my legs as it grabbed my neglected cock and started to pump it, matching the rhythm set by Axel's own thrusts.

It was too good. The feeling of being whole, the sensation of someone being deeper inside of me than anyone's ever been before, the intimate touches; I was burning. In my last moment I met those acid green eyes before stars filled my vision and I was sent into a moment of infinite bliss. I came hard and felt my muscles clench around Axel's cock as he continued to bury it inside of me. After a few more thrusts Axel let out a strangled cry as he came. I felt the warm liquid fill my insides as I came down from my amazing high. Utterly spent, Axel collapsed on top of me, pinning me beneath his body. I didn't even make an attempt to push him off; the two of us just lay there, panting.

Finally after a minute or two, Axel rolled off of me and onto his back. He lie there, catching his breath for a moment, before turning to me and smiling lazily. "God Roxas, you are fucking amazing," he said tiredly. I didn't have time to respond before he had reached over and pulled me into his arms. I slung one arm across his chest as I nuzzled my face into the crook of his neck.

"Well, now you know," I replied teasingly. He simply gave me a half-hearted noogie before the two of us fell asleep, completely worn out.

I will forever remember waking up to a very angry pink-haired man standing in the doorway screaming, "Goddammit Axel you did _not_ just have sex in my bed!" I pretended to sleep, as to avoid the wrath of the "fruitcake" standing a few feet away. Luckily after a few seconds with no response he simply threw his hands up and stormed off. I laughed softly and gently laid my head back down on Axel's chest, careful not to wake the sleeping redhead; however after looking up to see the smirk plastered on the "sleeping" redhead's face, I had a feeling I wasn't the only one who had been pretending to be asleep.


	8. Chapter 8

Disclaimer: I don't own Kingdom Hearts or any of the other franchise-y things in here.

Author's Note: Surprised you all with that lemon in the last chapter, did I? Ha ha ha, well I calls 'em as I sees 'em. Horny boys + alcohol = sex; can't argue with mathematics, folks. So anyways, I have a slightly interesting story behind this chapter. I wasn't really sure which direction to take the story in next, but I suddenly had an epiphany... while in the shower! Yes, it's true! Apparently being naked positively affects my creativity? Therefore immediately after drying off I proceeded to run to my computer and write this next chapter! Yep, all for you guys! I must say, having a sex scene creates a huge surge in readers/favorites/reviews. I was offline for a few days after posting chapter seven, but when I got back I swear my eyes popped out of my head when I saw all of the traffic/feedback/etc.! Naughty naughy fangirls (and boys)! Oh well, just don't tell me you were only here for the hot and steamy sex, because that would ruin our budding relationship and break my fragile little heart! Ha ha ha!

As always, lots of love! ~ NS

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I had woken up seeming relatively refreshed; but that had lasted for about half of a second. A throbbing pain immediately shot through my head and my eyes snapped open. Fuck, I hated hangovers. I rubbed slow circles over my temples, hoping to somehow relieve the pain that had only recently been brought to my attention. However, that wasn't the end of my newfound anxiety. The second stress factor mixed in to my morning happened to be the pale arm lying across my bare chest. As realization seemed to come creeping back to me I groaned loudly, partially in pain and partially in frustration. Apparently last night hadn't been just a totally amazing dream. Maybe I can't hold my booze nearly as well as I thought I could, as I had seriously fucked up big time.

Literally.

I heard a slow intake of breath from my right as I felt the arm, which had been so loose across my torso before, tighten its grip and pull me towards its owner. I let myself be dragged closer to the warm chest behind me and just waited for the inevitable. When I noticed that Axel hadn't said anything yet, I turned myself over, expecting an uncomfortable conversation to ensue. Might as well get it over with now, right?

I certainly didn't expect to see him still asleep. I chuckled, anxiety slowly slipping from my mind as I lay there and watched him sleep. That face which was normally contorted into some devious expression was uncharacteristically blank. His lips were slightly parted as he took slow, deep breaths in his slumber. He looked almost, angelic. Funny. Axel was about as far from being an angel as one could possibly be.

I couldn't help myself; I slowly lifted one of my hands and gently traced a simple teardrop pattern beneath one of his eyes. Why did this man, this _one person_ seem to fascinate me so? As I was gently outlining the contours of his lips with my finger, I noticed one eyelid flutter open, followed by its partner. For a split second that almost innocent look that I had witnessed before remained, only this time with eyes opened. I was momentarily paralyzed by the sheer unforeseen beauty of such an expression. If I would've blinked, I probably wouldn't have seen it, because that infamous lopsided smile immediately came to fruition less than a second later.

"Morning, Sleeping Beauty," I remarked sarcastically, voice dripping with mock annoyance. Axel merely smiled and closed his eyes again, gently taking the hand that had been exploring his face and held my palm against his cheek. He hummed with contentment, and for a moment I thought he might've fallen back asleep. After a minute or so however, Axel opened his eyes again and let go of my hand. He propped himself up on one elbow and looked straight at me.

"So, is there anything you feel you need to say, Roxas? Something like, 'Oh Axel, let's just pretend this never happened!' or 'I don't remember a thing, you molested me didn't you? You monster!' or my personal favorite, 'Axel my love that was positively breathtaking, I never want to be parted from you again!'" he asked, dramatically acting out each persona.

All attempts at being serious vanished as I caught myself laughing rather loudly at his theatrics. Damn, I don't think Axel could have a serious conversation if he tried. He seemed pleased with my reaction however, and leaned over for a quick kiss. I wrinkled my nose, tasting day-old alcohol and cigarettes.

"Your breath is terrible," I remarked.

Axel merely raised his eyebrows, still smiling. "Well yours is no bed of roses either, Roxas," he added. I laughed and gave him a weak push. Well, I thought it was a weak push, but apparently it was strong enough to knock him backwards and send him rolling off the bed. With a loud thud, Axel landed on the floor, tangled in bed sheets. I definitely wasn't able to contain myself this time, I burst out laughing. I could care less that the only cover over my naked body had just been pulled to the floor; that was fucking hilarious. My head was still killing me, especially now that I had restricted its oxygen intake, but it took a solid minute before I had quieted down enough to see if Axel needed any help.

Apparently not, as I had scarcely noticed him get up, let alone pounce onto the bed. Sheets still trapped around his waist, Axel pinned my wrists above my head and growled; "Now now Roxie, that wasn't very nice; especially after I was so _good_ to you last night." He leaned down and bit slightly on my neck, causing memories from our night together to come to the forefront of my mind. Uh-oh. It was way too early for this in my opinion; I didn't want to get carried away right after we had just woken up.

To my surprise, Axel must have felt something similar, as his expression softened instantaneously and he let himself fall onto the bed, pinning me beneath him. "Still tired?" I asked, allowing one of my hands to rise and run its fingers through his long hair. Axel grunted in reply, burying his face deeper into the crook of my neck. I chuckled, but was still feeling somewhat skeptical.

Was this not some sort of one-night stand? Are one-night stands supposed to be this… sweet?

Frankly, I was utterly confused by this behavior. At the party, both of us had been so goddamn horny that I assumed this was just the end result of copious amounts of liquor and thick sexual tension. I never would have imagined that we'd be lying in bed the next morning _cuddling _of all things. Hell, I wouldn't have been surprised if I never even saw Axel when I woke up.

Axel raised his head and looked at me, mimicking my puzzled expression. "Got something you need to ask Roxie? Or is that just the way your face always looks when you're thinking too hard?" he chided, playfully tapping the end of my nose and receiving an eye roll from yours truly.

I hesitated however, not sure if I should reveal my mistrust for his conduct. "I guess I was just trying to figure out… why you're still here," I replied cautiously, carefully reading his expression as I spoke.

Axel looked slightly hurt. "Do you not want me here?" he asked with a slight tone of remorse in his voice.

"No, no, of course I do!" I said frantically, shaking my head furiously and internally kicking myself for making it sound like I was upset that he was there. "That's not what I meant at all," I added after I was sure that he knew that I wasn't hoping he'd leave.

Axel's face had grown somewhat less worried, but his eyebrows were still pulled into a questioning expression. "Well what did you mean then?" he asked.

I glanced away, not wanting to meet his eyes. To tell you the truth, I was a little nervous. I mean, it's not like this is my first time waking up in bed with someone, but…

"I don't know, I guess I just assumed I was just gonna be a notch in your bedpost, so to speak," I continued softly, concerned over how he might take that bit of information. Probably not well. Ugh.

Slowly, I allowed my eyes to wander back to Axel's to check his reaction. I'm not sure what I had been expecting, but it certainly wasn't the wide grin that was spread across his face.

"Roxas, Roxas, Roxas; do you honestly think I'd still be here if you were just a notch in my bedpost?" he said while shaking his head, grin still firmly in place.

"Well that's why I was asking why–," I started, but was cut off by a pair of soft lips coming down to meet my own. The kiss only lasted a couple of seconds, but it was enough to keep me from continuing.

Axel raised himself up again and looked down at me. "I obviously want to keep you around longer than just one night Roxas, I really do like you a lot, and not just for the sex," he stated. "Though I must say, last night was fucking fantastic," he added with a wink. I felt my face flush red. Damn him and his perpetual horniness. Axel laughed and brought his face down to mine again, pressing our foreheads together. "Your face looks like a cute little tomato when you blush," he remarked with a smile. I rolled my eyes.

"Yeah well those sheets around your waist make you look like a girl," I retorted with a triumphant smirk.

Axel merely raised an eyebrow, and for a moment I thought perhaps I had gotten the last word in for once. I was completely caught off guard however when his hands were suddenly pinning my wrists down for the second time this morning as he slid a knee between my legs. I let out an involuntary groan due to the sudden proximity of his leg to such a sensitive area. I closed my eyes and let out a soft whimper as I felt his lips around my earlobe as he purred, "I think someone needs a little reminding as to who's the _girl_ in this bed."

Needless to say, I didn't get the last word.

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To say that the ride home was a bit unusual and awkward would have been an understatement; probably the understatement of the year.

Axel and I had woken up around eleven, but after an hour or two in bed and another hour in the shower (Marluxia's shower, we used his Herbal Essences shampoo) I wasn't sure what to expect when we returned downstairs. The scenarios I had gone over in my mind either included a very angry Demyx, a non-existent Demyx, or a passed out on the sofa and possibly naked Demyx. When Axel and I rounded the corner into the living room I discovered that it was Demyx number two: non-existent Demyx.

Axel groaned. "You gotta be fucking _kidding_ me, where the hell is Demyx?" he asked out loud to nobody in particular.

As if he had been personally asked, Marluxia waltzed out of the kitchen; arms folded and responded, "He went home with Zexion, not too long after the two of you _mysteriously_ disappeared." He was obviously still upset about the whole "we had sex in his bed" thing.

"Fucking Demyx, it's like nothing else in the world exists when _Zexion's_ around," Axel complained. "How the fuck are we supposed to get home now?"

Marluxia laughed evilly, well somewhat evil and somewhat gay. "Don't look at _me_," he sang as he retreated back into the kitchen with a smirk.

Obviously distressed, Axel ran a hand through his hair as he cursed. "Shit, is anyone else even here still?"

"Actually I think Luxord is still around somewhere. He was passed out in the back room for most of the night," Marluxia's voice said from the kitchen. Seriously, was this guy mad at us or not?

Axel's eyes lit up. "Great! I'll go find him! Oh wait, never mind," he said as a man with very short, pale blonde hair walked into the room. He looked a little worse for wear, though I had never seen him before. Axel either didn't notice this or didn't care, as he ran up to the groggy man and slung his arm over his shoulders. "Luxy, baby! I need a favor. You see my pal Roxie and I need a ride as ours has so rudely left us here in this dump."

"Hey!" Marluxia shouted from the kitchen.

Axel ignored him. "So would you be a dear and drop us off please? You know where I live and Roxie's at the University so that's not too far, right?" he added with a slight elbow nudge. The man next to him, Luxord, had been silent the entire time. In fact, he didn't even look as if he had been paying attention to the redhead's pleading. Axel seemed to have noticed this too, for his expression immediately changed from sweet to serious as he stated simply, "You owe me money."

As if his hearing had been miraculously restored, Luxord turned to Axel and replied jovially, "Of course I can help you out old chap, nothing like repaying friends for their kindness, yes?" I noticed that the man had a British accent, and I found it rather appealing. I'm actually a huge fan of accents (little known Roxas fact right there, keep that).

Axel's mood seemed to have returned to his previous state as he slapped Luxord on the back with a smile and said, "Well let's be going then! We can drop Roxas off first."

"Sure, sure," Luxord said as the three of us headed out the front door. Once he had gotten farther than a couple of feet in front of us, Axel bent down and whispered into my ear, "Okay, before we're trapped in a car with this lunatic for twenty minutes, I just wanted to warn you of a few things. He's a raging alcoholic, he's obsessed with gambling, and he's an incredibly unrelenting homophobe."

I couldn't contain the soft laugh that came out after hearing Axel's brief introduction. Luxord turned around and raised an eyebrow, but didn't say anything. I was inwardly thankful, as I wasn't sure what kind of excuse I'd have for the stranger. We walked towards an old white Suburban that just screamed "soccer mom" in my opinion. Axel opened the back door for me and I hopped into the tall car. Just as he was about to follow in after, I heard Luxord clear his throat from his new position in the driver's seat. "Now I know that this is returning a favor Axel, but I don't want the two of you sitting together back there if you're going to be doing all of your dirty little homosexual things," he stated with disgust. I wasn't sure whether to be offended or incredibly amused. This guy was a real piece of work.

Axel seemed unfazed by Luxord's comment. He coolly replied, "Well then I guess I'll just have to sit up front and do dirty little homosexual things with you instead then Luxy." I covered my mouth to keep from laughing. Luxord blanched and Axel took this as a sign to go ahead and sit in the back. He pulled himself up into the seat next to mine and buckled in. As he casually threw his arm behind me on the seat I swear that I saw a vein pop out of Luxord's head through the rearview mirror.

As he was backing out of Marluxia's driveway, Luxord glanced at Axel and said, "Just so you know, as far as covering my little debt to you, this is payment in full."

Axel nodded effortlessly. "Sure, sure. I know it won't be too long before you're asking me for money again anyway," he replied. "Did I hear you're wasting dough on hookers now too? Sheesh man, it was bad enough when you were just gambling it all away."

"Now now, they are perfectly acceptable establishments, Axel," Luxord replied curtly. "You make it sound as if I am slinking around the streets picking up trashy women! They are really quite civilized."

"Yeah I'm sure you get a lot of talking done," Axel said with a snort.

Luxord huffed. "Really Axel, I don't see what your quarrel is with me. Just because I like to go out and find some good pussy every now and then doesn't make me a bad man! Good pussy is hard to come by you know, women just don't put out like they used to. Like just the other day, I had me some great pussy when–,"

"Lux, no matter how many times you say the word 'pussy' it's not going to make it more appealing," Axel interrupted.

Luxord merely sighed angrily and went back to ranting. It went on like this for pretty much the entire duration of the car ride. I learned a lot about the blonde gambler. He was originally from London, but moved to the United States to attend school when he was about seventeen years-old. Apparently he wanted to move to Vegas; according to Axel it was Luxord's home away from home. Luxord also made it blatantly obvious how uncomfortable he was with so many of his friends being gay. He seemed to have some sort of conspiracy theory being formed in his head, sure that they were all going to kidnap him and gay him up. Truly, he was quite fearful of this.

I listened for the most part, and Axel would chime in occasionally to keep Luxord's fire going, but the two of us tuned the man out pretty well. Axel was massaging my scalp with his left hand and it felt pretty damn good. I closed my eyes and leaned into his touch, not wanting the pleasing sensations to end. Had the car ride been any longer, I might've fallen asleep right there. It was only too soon before I saw the familiar buildings of TTU looming on the horizon.

Was I really so reluctant to see this night (well, it was the middle of the next day now) end? I had been looking forward to Thursday night ever since Axel and I had met up last Sunday. Had it not even been a week since we had run into each other again? So much had happened in such a short amount of time. I had gone into that awful shop, Axel had found me and took me out for coffee, we ran into Sora and Riku and–

"Axel!" I exclaimed, a little too loudly for the car. Luxord slammed on the breaks and the two of us in the backseat were rocketed forward before being pressed back by the ridiculously tight seatbelts. I had been so caught up in my thoughts that I had been a bit overenthusiastic when I came back to reality. Slightly embarrassed, I looked down at my feet while I chewed on my lower lip. "Sorry Luxord, keep going," I said to the frazzled-looking blonde. He exhaled raggedly before continuing on. I was thankful that there hadn't been any cars behind us.

Axel looked at me questioningly from his spot next to mine. "What is it, Roxas?" He seemed concerned and now I felt like a fool for freaking everyone out over such a trivial matter.

"It's just, I had forgotten. Sora mentioned that he and Riku were gonna hang at the pier this Saturday, and that I should invite you to come along… if you wanted to that is," I stated, blushing slightly as I looked up at him.

Axel seemed slightly shocked, but this look was almost instantly replaced with his trademark smirk. "Aww Roxie, are you asking me out on a date?" he cooed.

Embarrassment being replaced with annoyance, I rolled my eyes for the billionth time and replied, "Yes you dope, but if you're gonna be like that then maybe I changed my mind."

The hand that had been massaging my scalp, up until it was flung from my body during our forceful stop a few moments ago, had once again returned to my head and proceeded to ruffle my hair. "Ah Roxas, don't be so coy. Of course I want to go with you. Besides, I liked your crazy brother and his mute boyfriend."

I punched Axel lightly in the side, but smiled all the while. He simply laughed and leaned down for a quick kiss. Suddenly the car swerved to the right and I was thrown unceremoniously into Axel's chest. I didn't go too far however, thanks (or no thanks) to the seatbelt. Axel coughed and glared at Luxord. I wasn't sure if he'd done it on purpose, or if it was just a reflex that came with freaking out over two guys kissing in his backseat.

I directed Luxord to my building and he pulled up in front of it. I squeezed Axel's hand before crawling away towards the opposite door. As I stepped out onto the pavement I turned to wave goodbye to the two guys in the white Suburban, but it appeared as if Axel was no longer in the backseat. Had he moved to the front? Suddenly I felt long, slender arms grab me from behind and pull me into a warm embrace.

"A hand squeeze? Did you really think after everything that's happened that I'd let you get away with just a slight hand squeeze as a goodbye?" Axel's voice teased in my ear.

I smiled and turned myself around to face him. "I didn't want Luxord to lose any more brain cells from the massive amounts of gayness in his car," I joked.

"He'll live, trust me," Axel replied. "Now where's my proper goodbye?"

I smirked and reached up to grab the collar of his zipped up hoodie. I roughly pulled Axel's lips down to mine for a sensual kiss. Out of the corner of my eye I could've sworn I saw Luxord duck down to avoid seeing us, or maybe he was throwing up. I could care less; I had more pleasant matters to attend to.

It wasn't until several seconds later that the two of us broke apart. Axel smiled down at me and said, "See you Saturday then baby, I'll be in touch." I nodded and smiled, but let out a very unmanly squeak when one of his hands strayed down for a quick ass grab. I scowled as he ran laughing back towards Luxord's car, but it was only a half-hearted scowl. I waved at the two of them as they pulled out of the parking lot and then proceeded to head up towards my building.

Man, all this crap made me feel like I was in high school again; but in a good way. Not all the stupid drama from high school, but the good "first love" shit from high school. Axel made me feel fun again, which was saying something. I hadn't had an enjoyable relationship since, well, probably never. If I was enjoying one it was usually faux happiness.

I was probably close to skipping back to my room as I approached the pathway surrounding my building and its surrounding neighbors. There weren't very many people around, since it was a Friday afternoon. In fact, there was only one figure that I could make out, and they were casually leaning against the side of my building, facing the parking lot. I took little notice of the stranger, although I was going to be passing by him or her momentarily. It wasn't until I was nearly an arm's length away from the figure that I started to take in their features. It was definitely a man, as his chest looked flat and firm and he didn't have the curves of a woman. His skin seemed slightly dark, well darker than mine. I looked over his hair and noticed it was long and silvery-gray. I suddenly felt a chill run down my spine. I had stopped walking and was now standing right in front of this "stranger" near my building. His long bangs fell in front of his eyes, but I could still see those fiery golden-orange pupils staring down at me with their mocking sense of superiority. His lips curled into a sneer as he leered down at me.

"Xemnas…"


	9. Chapter 9

Disclaimer: I still don't own Kingdom Hearts or anything else I may have mentioned in this story that obviously doesn't belong to me.

Author's Note: Wow, chapter 9 already? This story's like a freight train, who knows when it's gonna stop? Ha ha. My update was a little behind this time, I know, but I've made up for it with a few things! Unfortunately one of those is not an extra long chapter. This one just looks huge because of the massive author's note. Sorry! Okay so first of all, after my short period of inability to write the next part of this story, I suddenly went into a writing frenzy and wrote three chapters in a row! Crazy, right? Well, chapter 11 isn't finished, but I'm working on it. So the next update will probably not be as spaced out as this one was from the last chapter. I'm just trying to keep on top of things as much as I can. I unfortunately have (possibly) bad news. Now I know this is a humor, cute and fluffy story, but I have now successfully incorporated some good old-fashioned angst into this fic. Sorry to those of you who are out there shaking your heads in disappointment right now, but it was just something I felt needed to be added into the story. Don't worry, this isn't going to drastically change the feel of the story or anything, but it's definitely a new element.

I've been thinking (and no, it didn't hurt :P) about what sort of fic(s) I want to write next. I've been forming a few ideas in my head and I want to hear what you guys thing. Obviously, I will or won't write them of my own accord, but it's nice to hear what kind of things people want to read. My audience will probably be slightly biased to AkuRoku fanfiction of course, but hey, I'm taking that into consideration. Ha ha. Ok, so as I mentioned in a previous chapter, I had a couple of ideas. One was an AkuRoku oneshot (not smut), and another was a full-fledged story. Honestly, I'm not going to be writing another AkuRoku full-length fanfic while I'm doing this one still, so that's going to be put on hold for now. I did come up with a few other ideas for the time being though. First, I thought about making a fic made up of a series of oneshots based on Organization XIII. I thought it would be fun to say, pick two names out of a hat and then write a story based off of the pairing. Ratings would range from K to M, so I'd try my best to keep it exciting. Obviously there'd be some pretty weird stuff in there, ha ha. Who knows how many chapters I'd write though? Still, it sounds fun! Another idea was actually to pursue the idea of a Westside Story fic like I had previously mentioned in chapter 4. I have one slight barrier, however; I have absolutely no experience with Seifer/Hayner so I'd have to "study up" I guess. Ha ha. Sound interesting? Wait, there's more! I also wanted to write a series of AkuRoku oneshots, because I love them. It would be somewhere between 10 and 15 chapters, each with different storylines. Last, but not least, I had a really great idea for an AkuRoku short story. I'm thinking it'll end up being somewhere around 3 chapters, but don't hold me to that. So yeah, I know I've been incredibly vague as to what all of these are even going to be about, but I don't want to spoil the surprise (or get your hopes up if it happens that I don't end up writing something)! So, I'm gonna go try and figure out the poll-thingy and make a poll about all of this. Drop by my profile and vote if you'd like, or give me some ideas in a review or pm. I'm always open for suggestions. I'd love to get some fresh perspective from someone other than myself. If someone had an idea that I liked and said I could write about it, I totally would (all credit to the mastermind behind the plot of course). So talk to me, people! You know I love hearing from you! I hope you guys enjoy this chapter! :)

~NS

* * *

The lighthearted mood I had found myself in previously had vanished without a trace. I could feel the tension rippling through my body as I stared at the tall, menacing man before me.

We stared at each other, eyes locked, for a long while before I decided to speak. "Xemnas, what are you doing here?" I asked calmly, not breaking my gaze with those vivid, golden eyes.

He chuckled slightly, eyes closing momentarily before reopening and focusing on me once more. Completely disregarding my question, he asked, "Who's your friend, Roxas? The one with the bright red hair."

I scowled at him; I could already feel the tension rising dangerously. "That's none of your business. Now tell me, what the _fuck_ are you doing here?" I responded angrily. I could feel my heartbeat quicken as I felt my rage growing. My hands had now balled up into fists that clenched at my sides. Although I allowed my face to remain almost entirely impassive, the mood had definitely grown rather hostile. Internally I was struggling with combating desires; one to rip this man to pieces and one to kick myself for getting this worked up around him after all this time.

"I just happened to be in the neighborhood, and thought I'd stop by," Xemnas answered slowly, obviously unfazed by my rising anger. "I simply decided I'd check up on my dear Roxas, and I was quite surprised to see you so open and friendly with someone; with a _man_ especially." His lips spread into an even wider grin.

Each word, each syllable that left Xemnas' mouth was so calculated and precise, his speech almost sounded rehearsed. It was one of the things I hated about him. He always sounded so knowing, so _sure_, even now when I was silently fuming merely inches from him.

"Like I said before, it is none of your damn business who I'm friendly or unfriendly towards. You are no longer a part of my life, Xemnas; now, I would appreciate it if you would get the hell away from me," I snarled. My anger seemed to be growing exponentially. All of the pent up rage that I had never gotten a chance to burst free was slowly beginning to seep forth into my conscious mind. I found myself seeing red.

No reaction. Nothing. Nothing but that evil smirk that seemed to consistently stretch across his face. It only made me angrier. This man was capable of causing such a raging anger in me by simply existing. Yet somehow, even with all of my suppressed fury, I could do absolutely nothing to affect him. His face was like an unalterable mask.

Xemnas chuckled again, a deep throaty sound that was almost frightening. "Now now, no need to use such harsh words, Roxas. You really should be _thanking_ me for opening your mind and allowing you to see the appeal of both men and women. To think, you had been denied of your true nature for so long."

My eyes narrowed as I felt a chill run down my spine as the words slowly left his mouth. "I have absolutely nothing to thank you for Xemnas," I spat coldly. His smile grew bigger and his teeth began to show as a manic look appeared in his eyes.

"Really? After all I've done for you? Dear Roxas, your words cut me _deeply_," he said with faux hurt. I wasn't fooled. I knew this man. I knew that smile. I knew those eyes. I knew him way more than I ever wanted to, and I knew that he was lying. A darker expression appeared on his face as he added, "Do I have to remind you how much you need me? How much you want to please me?" Had I not been filled with rage, Xemnas would have appeared incredibly frightening.

"Go. To. Hell." I spat through gritted teeth. "I don't need you anymore, and I sure as hell don't want you anymore."

Xemnas stood there smirking down at me, and in a flash his expression had morphed into one of pure anger. His hand darted forward and grabbed my collar as he grabbed it roughly and slowly began to lift me upwards. Xemnas held me off of the ground in front of him, eyes on fire.

"Need I refresh your memory as to who it was who transformed you from the quiet little shy kid into the popular, sexy boy that everyone wanted? Who was it who taught you everything you know about desirability and getting what you want? Who taught you how to stand on your own to feet and _live for the moment_?" he taunted, shouting directly into my face.

As his rage grew I felt my courage begin to fade away. I started to flinch at his harsh words and shy away from his furious expression. I squirmed and kicked as he spun around and slammed me into the wall behind him. I hissed in pain, but felt no relief as he continued to press me harder into the side of the building. He brought his lips up to my ears and I shut my eyes tight and turned my head away. He was too powerful, too strong. All of my anger had been converted into fear, and it felt as if nothing had changed at all since high school. I flinched as I felt his breath against my ear as he whispered darkly, "Don't you remember who it was who taught you how to experience pleasure beyond your wildest dreams?" He drew his head back and stared directly at me, expression filled with anger, arrogance, and a glint of what I was most afraid of; lust.

I hardened my expression, using all of my strength to keep my eyes drilled into his and my lips from quivering. "There is absolutely nothing that I need to thank you for. You've already taken enough from me."

As if sensing my depleting anger, Xemnas' frightening smirk grew wider. "Well, it appears as if the two of us have differing opinions on that matter, Roxas. You want to know why I'm here? I'll tell you why I'm here. I gave and gave and gave and asked for almost nothing in return from you, but now I've decided; I'm here to collect my debt," he said coldly, and my eyes flew open in complete terror as he rolled his hips against mine with his last word. I felt myself melt into a puddle of fear. He was going to rape me. All other thoughts had flown from my mind. Xemnas was going to _rape_ me. My body grew numb with fright as I desperately sought for a way out. I cringed and tried to pull away from him with all of my might as his other hand slid up underneath my shirt and began to roughly tweak one of my nipples. Xemnas leaned forward again and whispered into my ear, "Does your little boyfriend know about all of the dirty things you did back home? Does he know about your slutty little reputation?"

"D-don't," I stuttered out.

"How do you think he'd react if he found out how soiled you really are? He'd probably want nothing to do with you. You're damaged goods, Roxas."

"No," I said weakly, already feeling tears prickling at the corner of my eyes. Xemnas' rough caress had only gotten more and more painful with each word exchanged. I flinched at his touch, at his words. I hated the man. I hated myself.

"Roxas!"

I turned my head towards the voice that had called my name. My stomach churned with feelings of relief and feelings of shame as I saw both my brother and Riku run towards me.

"Get the fuck away from Roxas right now, Xemnas!" Riku shouted; his voice louder than I'd heard it in a long time. I flinched, knowing how angry Riku must be to show that much emotion. Xemnas merely turned his vicious smile towards the newcomers, not changing his position whatsoever. However, I was thankful that his sadistic ministrations had stopped. It was something.

"Well well, if it isn't the Dream Team," Xemnas chided. "Still bending over for this prick I see, my little Sora."

Neither Riku nor my brother got angry, like _really_ angry, very often. When they did, you had better watch out. I watched as Sora's body trembled with rage. "Put. Roxas. Down." he said slowly. When Xemnas didn't move Sora's eyes grew wide and he screamed, "You put Roxas down right now you son of a bitch!" I was shocked. Sora rarely shouted or swore. Xemnas retained his arrogant smile, but complied with Sora's wish. I felt his grip loosen as my body slid down the hard wall behind me. As my feet hit the ground I felt my legs crumple beneath me, nerves shot from the adrenaline that had been pumping through my veins for the past few minutes.

"Roxas!" Sora exclaimed as both he and Riku ran towards me. Weakly, I lifted my arms and allowed the two of them to help me up. With one arm slung over each of their shoulders, I dangled limply in their grasp. Sora glared darkly at Xemnas. "If I ever see you around my brother again, you will most definitely regret the day you stepped foot into our lives."

Xemnas merely grinned wider. "Is that so?" he asked. "We'll have to see about that, won't we Roxas?" he said, eyes locking with mine. I gulped, all confidence having been erased from my being.

Riku growled next to me. "Leave," he said firmly. Xemnas directed one last terrifying smile at me before turning and walking towards the parking lot. The three of us stood there watching him until he out of sight. Both Sora and Riku were quiet, but I could hardly tell if there were any noises besides my own rapid heartbeat.

Xemnas wanted to rape me. That was all I could think about as the two of them gently led me up to my room. I was vaguely aware of the fact that we had reached my door. Mindlessly, I retrieved my key from my pants pocket and allowed the two of them to guide me towards my bed. As I was slowly set down onto my bed, I felt my phone vibrate. Almost as a reflex, I pulled it out to see who had sent me a text message. Well apparently it was Axel the Sex God. Unfortunately he would have to wait, as my twin brother was now commanding my complete attention.

"Roxas, what happened? Did he do anything to you? What's he doing here?" Sora asked frantically, face hovering inches from mine as he leaned over me.

I stared at Sora for a couple of minutes before answering any of his questions. "I don't know, I just… came back from the party and he was standing there. It was like he was waiting for me."

Sora took my hand in his and gently squeezed it. "Are you okay?" he asked softly. I swallowed thickly, but nodded. "Yeah I'm fine I just... fuck. I _hate_ how he still fucking gets to me after it's been this long! I thought this was a demon I had conquered in high school," I replied, crestfallen.

"I know. Don't worry. We won't let him lay a finger on you again, right Riku?" Sora stated, standing up straight. Riku nodded in agreement from his spot near the door, eyebrows knitted together with concern. I was touched that the two of them were being so understanding. Sure, I understood that Riku's worry wasn't entirely for me. Obviously Sora had been largely involved throughout Xemnas' influence in my life the last time. Still, I was glad that I had people to go to.

"Thanks guys," I said, a small smile tugging at the corners of my lips. I was starting to feel some of my worry melt away with their words. Xemnas wasn't so powerful. He's only human. I had broken from his grasp before, I could do it again. I was stronger now, and I had friends by my side. I… I didn't have to worry about him so much. I could do this.

"Well, I'm sorry I have to leave you like this Roxas, but it's past 3 and I have class at 3:30. I'll see you two later, alright?" Riku said.

Sora turned to face him and nodded in understanding. "Okay, we'll see you when you get out of class," he replied. Riku nodded as well before walking over and bending down quickly to peck Sora on the lips. My brother smiled and I was happy that the tension was already starting to wear off.

"Hey, where's mine?" I asked playfully. Riku smirked and pretended to lean down to kiss me too, but Sora was quick. He immediately placed a firm hand over Riku's chest and pushed him towards the doorway.

"No time, gonna be late for class! Bye Riku!" he said hurriedly as he shoved his chuckling boyfriend towards the door. He laughed slightly before closing the door and turning to me again, a small smile playing at his features.

"Well if you're already reverting into your sarcastic self, then there mustn't be too much to worry about, right?" Sora asked with his head cocked slightly to the side.

I shook my head. "Nah. I mean, I doubt this is the last time we'll see Xemnas' ugly face, but hopefully by then I'll be able to hold my own in front of him better."

Sora sat down next to me and placed a hand on my shoulder. "You're already so much stronger than you used to be, Roxas. I know that he'll never plague you like he did before. Never again."

I smiled at my twin before dramatically wiping fake tears from my eyes. "Thanks, dearest brother," I responded, pretending to sob. Sora smiled and playfully punched me in the side. I faked pain for a moment before grinning brightly at him. Hey, it's not like he ever believed me when I faked an injury anyway. Sure made life annoying when we played soccer together back in grade school.

"So," Sora began with a suggestive smirk and an eyebrow wiggle. "How'd the party go?"

I shrugged, acting uninterested. Sora seemed slightly disappointed; that was until I turned and faced him with the most devilish grin I could muster spreading across my face.

"Pretty damn good," I responded.

"Do I get to hear any of the details? That is, unless they involve you and any sort of physical interaction with another person. Those I'd rather not hear. They'd give me nightmares," Sora said with a shudder.

I rolled my eyes. "Oh please, and you think I like seeing you and your boy toy all over each other constantly. I can't even count the number of times I had to sleep with my headphones in because of all of the noise you two were making in bed."

Sora rolled his eyes; an exact replica of the action that I'd performed previously. "It's not like you have to listen you know," he reasoned

"That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard. Sora, I couldn't _not_ listen if I tried," I said matter-of-factly.

"You're the stupidest thing I've ever heard," Sora snapped; eyebrow raised, challenging me.

"Damn, I can't ever do 'your mom' jokes when I'm with you," I said in defeat. He simply laughed as he slowly got off of the bed and dusted off his pants, which weren't really dirty at all. It was an unusual habit of his.

"Well I win this round baby brother. I'll leave you to plot your revenge," he said to me.

"Ah yes, I'm already getting a feel for it now. I'm thinking somewhere along the lines of putting a giant magnet in your ceiling. With all that metal jewelry you seem to have, you should stick no problem," I responded with a wink. Sora laughed.

"Okay, enjoy working on that," he said. "And Roxas?"

I raised my eyebrows as I looked up at him. "Hmm?"

"Don't be afraid to talk to me if you need to alright?" he added cautiously.

I got up from my bed and sauntered over to where my brother was now standing. Placing one hand on each shoulder, I looked him straight in the eye. "Sora, you know that you'd be the first one I'd come to if I wanted to talk, alright? Don't worry about it," I told him reassuringly, shaking his shoulders lightly. He smiled.

"Yeah I know, I'm just being mushy," Sora said sheepishly.

"I know, it's starting to get on my nerves," I teased. Sora pretended to be taken aback and pushed me lightly.

"Jerk," he said.

"You love me," I responded.

"Only because I have to," he added. I pouted, but he quickly dismissed it. "Hey, hey, so did you talk to Axel about coming to the pier with us tomorrow night?"

I waved my hand. "Yeah of course, no sweat. He's coming. I mean, who can resist these eyes?" I replied, batting my eyelashes at my twin brother.

"It's a gift," Sora said in agreement. "Alright, I'm actually going now so I'll see you tomorrow night. Does 7 o'clock sound good? Riku said he'd drive."

"Fuck yeah," I responded excitedly; half from the date and half from the fact that we'd be driving in Riku's brand new BMW. He was kind of a spoiled rich kid who could probably have anything on the planet. Okay, so he wasn't exactly spoiled. Riku was actually very humble. He rarely used his parents' massive amounts of money to get anything luxurious, but when he did… damn. I thanked the heavens that he was dating my twin brother.

"Good. Tell your boy toy we'll pick him up, alright?" Sora asked, halfway out the door.

"Got it!" I yelled after him, just before the door closed.

Silence.

For the first time in a while, I was allowed to bask in sweet, unscarred silence. I flopped back on my bed and stretched out across it. I found myself tracing patterns in the ceiling with my eyes again, but before too long my mind had wandered to the day's previous events. I sighed.

"Xemnas…" I said to no one in particular.

Our relationship had been twisted from the start. If I really thought about it, everything really went back to my freshman year in high school.

I had come to Destiny High with my twin brother, his best friends Kairi and Riku, as well as Kairi's twin sister (and a close friend of mine) Namine. The five of us had been close friends since childhood. Crossing the threshold into high school seemed like a massive occurrence at the time. We were teenagers, wanting to grow up so fast. As most high school kids were, we were all desperately seeking to meet new people and try new things; one of those being relationships. It's almost embarrassing to recall my brother trying to set me up with Kairi, and then _Namine_ of all people. Both were like my own sisters, but Sora insisted on getting me a girlfriend, so I just went along with it. That's usually how things went when Sora was particularly passionate about something.

Needless to say, both relationships lasted little more than a few months. It was just, weird. Kairi and I had done nothing more than hold hands occasionally. Neither one of us really knew what else to do. Namine and I had kissed once, and it was honestly one of the most awkward moments in my entire life. I think we were all kind of playing along for Sora's sake, and also partially to try out the whole "dating" thing for ourselves. Still, none of us really had any idea what we were doing.

So, after those two miserable excuses for relationships during my freshman year, I decided to stay single for a while. I wasn't too keen on the whole dating thing anyway. It just didn't seem like something I'd enjoy. I hated how you could be friends with someone one moment, but the minute you're in a relationship everything seems to change. You acted differently around each other, started to feel nervous in their presence, and began to second-guess yourself constantly. In my mind, friendships were the way to go. I didn't have many friends, but I had enough. Quality over quantity was definitely my policy.

It wasn't until my junior year in high school that dating crawled back into my life. A few of my friends had been in relationships, both bad and good. Kairi had dated our new friend Tidus for a while, although they eventually decided to remain friends. Riku, who was always surrounded by a swarm of girls (and a very angry and obviously jealous Sora), definitely had his fair share of dates. I'm pretty sure he had lost his virginity by the time we were in our sophomore year. Knowing what I do now, I'm pretty sure he just did it for no reason other than to do it. Riku never got attached to any of the girls he had toted around on his hip. Sora seemed to be the only one who could make him smile, like genuinely smile. I think everyone was relieved when the two of them finally became an item in the beginning of our junior year in high school. It was one of those "It's about time!" moments.

Junior year. It certainly wasn't a year I attributed fond memories to. It all began on that one fateful Monday morning in my history class. Sora and Kairi were in the class too, and the three of us all sat in the same row. I felt a soft tap on my right shoulder and I turned around to face my twin.

"What?" I asked, rather irritated. I did not like history, I did not like mornings, and I did not like Mondays.

"Well good morning to you too grumpy pants," he teased. I flicked his nose.

Sora winced and rubbed his nose vigorously before continuing. "Meanie. Hey, so I met this really cool girl in my art class. I think you'd like her Roxas. Want me to set you up with her?" Sora asked slyly, hand now removed from his newly red nose. My twin was much more social than I was, so I really shouldn't have been surprised by his proposition.

"Not particularly, no," I responded before turning around to continue scribbling notes down from the board.

"Aww, you're no fun. Whatever, I'm gonna introduce you to her anyway," Sora whispered from behind me. I sighed and shrugged my shoulders. There was really no point in arguing with Sora when he really wanted something anyway. Who knows, maybe I would like this girl?

Or maybe not so much.

As soon as the lunch bell rang after trigonometry (another class I had with Sora) I felt myself being dragged out of the classroom and out towards the cafeteria by my over-excited brother.

"Sora, I really don't know about this," I whined as the two of us pushed through the crowd that had accumulated inside of the cafeteria.

"Relax, you'll love her," Sora said reassuringly. I sighed in defeat, knowing that there was no way I'd be getting out of this on.

Sora's face was scrutinizing the cafeteria carefully as he scanned the area. Suddenly his eyes lit up and he waved frantically at someone I couldn't see. "Here she comes!" Sora said excitedly. I barely had time to sigh before a small girl with short, dark hair pushed out of the crowds and appeared in front of us.

"Hi, I'm Yuffie!" she said brightly.

"I'm… Roxas," I said hesitantly, worried that this girl might jump on me. She seemed a little too energetic, much like my twin brother. I could see why he liked her so much.

"Roxas! Nice to meet you! C'mon, let's sit together!" she said before roughly grabbing my arm and dragging me towards where she came. Dang, for someone so tiny she sure had a powerful grip. I barely had time to turn to my brother and cast him a pleading glance before being lost in the throngs of hungry high school students.

Yuffie was… an acquired taste. She definitely took some getting used to, but she actually grew on me after a while. We became pretty good friends after a month or two. When she asked if I wanted to go out with her, I said yes; mainly because she was the first girl who had shown any interest in having a relationship with me who wasn't practically my sister.

Little did I know how crazy my life was about to get.

Much to my surprise, Yuffie was quite the party girl. She always knew who was having a party, when they were having it, who was going, and everything in-between. I was intrigued to see this side of her after we had started dating. Needless to say, I was brought along to nearly every party she went to. After a while I had become somewhat of a regular. People knew who I was, and I recognized a few of the faces I saw, but I wasn't going to get to deep into the party scene. That wasn't my style.

One face I had begun to see more and more often was one of a dark-skinned man with bright golden eyes. I had seen him before at Yuffie's friend Leon's house. I had been wandering around the house, taking in the surroundings, when suddenly my gaze was locked with his. I had never seen eyes quite so captivating as his before, and I quickly looked away embarrassed. I wasn't entirely sure if the smirk I had seen on the man's face was real or entirely in my imagination.

It wasn't until I had been attending parties with Yuffie for about a month that the stranger decided to approach me and introduce himself. I had been sitting on another couch at another house at yet another party when I saw him out of the corner of my eye. He had this commanding walk that seemed to exude superiority. I found it pretty intimidating and quickly averted my gaze. Much to my surprise, the man actually came and sat down next to me on the couch, right in my line of vision.

"I believe I've seen you here before. My name's Xemnas," he said as he offered his hand for a handshake.

I grasped his hand firmly and replied, "Yeah, I think I've seen you too, at Leon's house. I'm Roxas."

"Ah yes, Leon is… an acquaintance of mine," Xemas stated.

He smiled at me, and I was impressed by his perfect teeth. I started to feel a little funny. Was I seriously thinking of this man as attractive? This _man_? I shook off the feeling, blaming it on the cloud of smoke lingering in the air. Whoever's house this was obviously didn't mind numerous teenagers smoking pot in their living room. Maybe I was high or something.

Week after week, I began to see Xemnas more and more frequently. The two of us would talk more and more. I found out that he had actually graduated high school almost four years before, but simply enjoyed the atmosphere of the party scene. At the time I nodded and accepted this, sort of understanding how someone might want to come and have fun and relive old memories every once in a while. I told him about myself and how I wasn't exactly the party type. "This is Yuffie's thing, not mine. I'm mainly just doing this for her," I remember saying one night.

Xemnas looked at me with a sly smile. "Now Roxas, that just won't do. Do you always want to be the timid little mouse of a boy that you are now? I can teach you how to _really_ have a good time. Don't you want to feel what it's like to live in the moment?"

I was hesitant at first, I mean, I felt as if I had only met this man. He held his hand out expectantly, as if he were making some sort of deal with me. I looked down at his hand before looking him in the eye. I wanted to change, I really did. I was tired of being looked at as the wallflower. I wanted to be the one people talked about for once. I was sick of being Sora's brother or Yuffie's boyfriend. I wanted to be Roxas. I wanted Roxas to be the name people talked about. I brought my hand forward and firmly shook Xemnas' own hand.

"It's a deal," I said, sealing my own fate.


	10. Chapter 10

Disclaimer: Still don't own Kingdom Hearts *sigh*

Author's Note: So, we've officially entered into the double digits. Exciting, no? I'm gonna try to keep this short and sweet, seeing as how the last author's note was massive. This chapter was written immediately after I wrote chapter 9, but I tweaked it a bit before uploading because I'm a perfectionist. Ha ha. This chapter is entirely a flashback. I'm sorry that the fluff has temporarily disappeared from this story, but I promise it'll be back very soon. Bear with me my dears! Love you all!

P.S. I'm in the planning stages for a few different fics at the moment. Before too long I'm sure you'll see something new by me pop up. :)

* * *

If freshman year in high school was when it all began, then junior year was definitely when the chaos ensued.

Xemnas had taken me under his wing, so to speak. He had begun to take me and Yuffie to parties of his own, parties with much older patrons; colleges students. Yuffie didn't seem to mind, in fact she was ecstatic. She was practically putty in Xemnas' fingers now. The appeal of being able to brag about hanging out with so many _college guys_ to all of her friends had her drunk with admiration for the man. Being that Yuffie was around so many guys all the time, I had just assumed that we weren't exclusive. These assumptions were confirmed over and over again once we started hanging out with Xemnas. I would walk in on her making out with some random guy all the time; I'd even caught her in bed with someone else before. Surprisingly, it bothered me a lot less than I thought it would. I mean honestly, the two of us weren't exactly in a super relationship. Her interest in me had dwindled greatly, and mine had pretty much stayed the same (which wasn't much to begin with).

Another thing that had changed greatly when I started hanging out with Xemnas was my outlook on the party life. Before, it had seemed like a chore to tag along with Yuffie to these countless events where people drank beer, acted stupid, and made out all over the house. Almost made one lose all confidence in the human race. It was slightly revolting. Xemnas was quick to inform me that I had been looking at things all wrong. To him, these were times for us to cast aside all of our previous notions of "right and wrong" and simply do what we felt compelled to do. Live for the moment. Listen to your heart. I guess you could compare it to that.

I had my first hangover the night after I shook hands with Xemnas. I had drunk very little alcohol before that night, as I was almost always the designated driver for Yuffie and her friends. Besides, its taste was far from tempting. Xemnas felt compelled to change my point of view on this as well.

"You'll learn to like the taste Roxas, but the real catch is what it does to you. Alcohol can erase all of your fears, all of your worries; make you into an entirely different person. Don't you want that, Roxas?"

After the first two shots, I could feel myself loosening up greatly. I began to talk with all sorts of people that I had barely said three words to before. I felt myself growing more confident, and I liked it. I was suddenly surrounded by people. Friends. _My_ friends. Not Sora's, not Yuffie's, _mine_.

Sora had walked into our bathroom the next morning to see me praying to the porcelain god. I pushed myself up with all of my strength and groggily peered at him from over the toilet. He frowned before turning to leave, and I suddenly felt a feeling in my stomach that had nothing to do with the alcohol. Still, I proceeded to throw up again.

It was two weeks later that I had my first joint. We were back in the house that Xemnas and I had shaken hands in, back where I had first consumed copious amounts of alcohol in one sitting. The two of us were sitting on the couch again, beers in hand, when he beckoned for another male to come over. This man was one I had seen before. He had long, blue hair and piercing yellow eyes; much like Xemnas', but much less appealing. Was I suggesting that I found Xemnas appealing? I shook my head to rid myself of these thoughts, but abruptly stopped as I felt a light tap on my shoulder. Xemnas was smiling that positively devilish smile at me as he held a thin, white item in-between his pointer finger and thumb. I looked up to see that the blue-haired man had one as well.

Xemnas reached towards me, offering me a smoke. "Here Roxas, try this stuff. You won't regret it," he said. I had definitely never tried any sort of drugs before, not even tobacco. I was slightly skeptical about trying marijuana, but Xemnas made sure to reassure me. "Trust me Roxas, you're gonna feel great. It really clears your head," he added. I could already see his pupils dilating.

That was my first high. I loved the feeling, and I wanted more. Xemnas and his friend with the blue hair (I later learned his name was Saix) showed me how to roll my own, and before long I was a pro.

It was a month after that when I lost my virginity.

We were at a different house this time. Actually, it was practically a mansion. Someone's parents were on a business trip and so the house was free for the whole weekend. In other words, it was party time.

I had become pretty well-acquainted with the regular party goers by now. Most everyone knew me by name by now. I was surrounded by people almost constantly. Whether it was talking, dancing, drinking, whatever, people just seemed to want to be around me; and damn did it feel good.

It was a rare moment in which Xemnas and I were sitting alone on the balcony when he turned and asked me, "You're a virgin aren't you, Roxas?"

I choked on the half-empty beer I had been drinking and had to cough and splutter for a few minutes before responding, rather embarrassed. "Well, yeah," I said, rubbing the back of my head nervously. I looked up at Xemnas to gauge his reaction, but all he did was smile at me before disappearing into the house. Curious, I watched him as he approached a tall, blonde girl. She looked at him with slight interest as he leaned forward and whispered something into her ear. He pulled away and pointed at me and her eyes locked with mine. A sly smile crept onto her pale face as she set her drink down and walked towards me. Feeling slightly anxious, I looked around for some sort of escape. I had no clue what Xemnas had said to this woman and now she was staring like me like I was her prey. It was mere seconds before she was standing right in front of me, heavily made-up face obstructing my entire vision.

"Hi there cutie," she said with a wink. "Your friend there tells me you're looking for a good time tonight."

I searched my mind frantically for words, but the alcohol and lack of experience with women had combined forces in order to make me look like a complete and total idiot.

"Um, well I don't know. I just–," I began, but was cut off when a plump set of cherry-red lips came down and captured mine in a demanding kiss. I just stood there, shocked. I had never had any experience with anyone this forward before. The girl didn't seem to mind though, she quickly took charge of the kiss and skillfully slid her tongue in-between my lips. Not knowing what else to do, I began to nervously return the kiss and she seemed to smile in delight. With a last lick to my bottom lip, she pulled away and grabbed my hand.

"Come on baby, let's take this somewhere quiet," she said with a sultry smile as she led me back into the house. There was no sign of Xemnas as I was being silently taken to an unused bedroom on the first floor. The girl walked us both in and locked the door before turning to me and saying, "Well now, let's have some fun."

The whole experience was rather fuzzy to me, but I'd be lying if I said I hadn't enjoyed it. Hell, I don't even remember the girl's name. One thing I was aware of was that a new door had been opened in front of me. The sex had been clumsy and somewhat short, but I had crossed a threshold. I felt as if now with my virginity cast aside, sex was merely something to do; like drinking and smoking. As Xemnas said, it's all for our own personal gratification. Looking out for number one. Follow your heart. All the same, right?

If I said I had a reputation before, it was nothing compared to what I had after the sexual barrier had been broken down. After a few more girls, I had gotten rather good at the art of seduction. I knew exactly what they wanted and how to give it. A trail of kisses down the side of the throat, a tiny bite on the collarbone, a lick here, a thrust there. Bang. I'm the sexy blonde with the sweet, baby blue eyes who's great in bed.

By this point I had presumably become an incredibly confident guy. I had no fear when talking to other party goers, men or women. I flirted with anyone and everyone. I was the center of attention at nearly every event I went to. Yuffie had taken a greater interest in me it seemed, as I was now more of her arm candy than her chauffer. Yup, things seemed to be going pretty well.

However, it was then that I began to realize that I really was feeling attracted to Xemnas. I couldn't quite put my finger on it, but I felt as if it had something to do with the commanding presence he seemed to have in my mind. He was the one who had showed me how to be cool; he was the one who helped me. I had become so much more confident, but here was a man who would always be my superior. I found it absolutely thrilling. Still, I wasn't too sure if he'd be interested. Besides, I hadn't had any experience with seducing men yet. Sure, harmless flirting was easy, but getting one in bed wasn't something I was familiar with.

I was at a party at someone's house who lived out of town, so there were a lot of people I wasn't too familiar with. Feeling too uninterested with meeting new people, I decided to spend the evening with Xemnas. I'd had a little more to drink than he had, and my alcohol tolerance was significantly lower than his (even though mine was pretty dang good for someone my size), so I wasn't entirely myself. I'm not even sure what the two of us had been talking about, but before I knew it I felt his hands begin to touch me. My face, my arms, my chest. I closed my eyes and leaned into his touch as he reached up to stroke my face again. "Such a pretty face," he said. "So soft and so misleading." I cast him a sexy smile, completely disregarding the fact that the two of us had never been intimate before. I saw him lean forward and I felt my heart leap for joy. This is what I had wanted, wasn't it? His lips met mine in a fierce, possessive kiss. I could feel his greed from such a simple gesture, and it excited me. So much raw passion in such a short action; I definitely wanted more. I leaned forward and kissed him back just as hard, trying to express all of my need in the same manner that he had. After we broke apart he smiled that same old devilish sneer, as if he had been expecting this all along. Rising from the couch, he walked away towards the hallway and I followed.

After finding a room to his liking Xemnas roughly grabbed my wrist and pulled me inside, locking it behind him. He pinned me against the wall, wrists trapped above my head by the iron grip of his strong hands. I panted heavily, already feeling myself growing aroused by such simple actions.

"You want me," he said. It wasn't a question.

I nodded. It was impossible to keep anything from Xemnas.

"Then let me show you how to properly pleasure a man," he said huskily as he roughly kissed me once more. I tried to keep up, but I was so overpowered by him that all I could do was let him have his way with me. Xemnas' tongue easily dominated my mouth, furiously exploring every inch as I simply complied with his desire. Soft whimpers were escaping through my lips, heavily muffled due to the set of lips constantly smothering my own. Xemnas stopped his assault on my mouth after a few minutes and pulled away to look at me. I could feel his cold, calculating eyes taking in my every feature. He scanned my body up and down approvingly and seemed highly amused with my half-hard erection that was now prodding him in the leg. Xemnas reached a hand down and roughly stroked my clothed arousal and I moaned loudly. He smirked, the same smirk as always. Then, he was gone. I opened my eyes fully, recovering from my brief moment of pleasure, and saw him standing a few steps back from where he had been originally. I watched his hands as they slowly moved to the hem of his pants and slowly started to undo his belt. I couldn't tear my eyes away as he threw it aside and proceeded to unbutton his pants and remove them completely. I could now see that I wasn't the only one who was turned on by this experience. He slowly lowered the last remaining piece of clothing that covered his lower half and stood there, completely exposed and completely unembarrassed.

"Come here, Roxas," Xemnas beckoned, and I immediately obeyed. I stepped forward until I was directly in front of him again as I waited for my next command. "On your knees," he said with a sneer. I obeyed and knelt down on the floor, now eye-level with his hardened cock. I stared at it, enraptured, but was brought out of my trance by his next command. "Now, suck it."

Tentatively, I leaned forward and took the head into my mouth. I heard him exhale and decided to continue. I began to swirl my tongue around the stiff member, hoping that I was doing the right thing. It was unusual, but the fact that I was able to pleasure Xemnas made it seem as if I was doing something pleasing to myself. I reached a hand down and began to lower my own pants, taking my own arousal in my hand and stroking it hungrily. I moaned, causing vibrations to resonate through my mouth. I heard a slight groan from Xemnas as he brought his hands down to tangle painfully in my hair. He began to pull my head back and forth, bobbing up and down on his cock, orchestrating my every movement. I could feel him tensing up, getting even more desperate. His commands were causing me to take him deeper and deeper into my mouth, until I was almost gagging. Tears were prickling at the corners of my eyes due to the strain, but I continued to pleasure myself while pleasuring him. I could feel him shuddering and I knew from my own experience being on the receiving end of a blowjob that he wasn't about to last much longer. Xemnas' hands were forcing his cock farther and farther down my throat until I did gag. I felt my throat muscles clench around him and he let out a long groan. I immediately felt a warm fluid fill my mouth and trickle down my throat. It tasted… bitter. As he pulled out of my mouth I reached my free hand up to wipe off my lips. Xemnas looked down at me, breathing heavily.

"That was not bad for your first time Roxas," he stated. I could already see that smirk coming back onto his features as he watched my hand slide up and down my still painfully hard erection. He lifted me up and placed me on the bed that was a few paces behind us. I was trapped in a haze of lust, barely taking in what was happening. That was, until I felt a firm hand replace my own around my cock. I groaned loudly, arching my back slightly against the sheets. I heard Xemnas chuckle over me before continuing his ministrations. His actions grew faster and faster until I was panting heavily and muttering incoherent words under my breath. The feelings I was experiencing were driving me crazy; never before had I felt this way. Sex with women was great, but it was something different entirely to feel some sense of attraction beyond physical gratification towards your partner. After a few more pants and rough strokes I came hard, dirtying Xemnas' hand as well as my own chest. I lay there, breathing heavy and basking in the moment. There was definitely something different about pleasuring men than there was with pleasuring women, and I liked it.

At the next party, Xemnas had given me the blowjob, allowing me to experience the full extent of what he had. It was far better than anything I had ever experienced with any woman before. His expert tongue was giving me sensations that drove me positively wild. My legs trembled, barely able to hold my own weight as he continued to pleasure me relentlessly. I wanted this forever, I wanted him. After coming down from my own personal high, Xemnas looked at me and asked me, "Do you want me?" His lips were curled upward into his cross between a sneer and a smirk. It was an expression that I saw on him almost constantly.

"Yes. More than anything," I replied. He merely chuckled deeply.

"Good."

Xemnas wasn't at the next party. Or the next one. Or the one after that. I found myself immediately scouting out his silvery hair whenever I entered a new room, only to be met with disappointment. I tried to distract myself from the empty feeling I was feeling in my chest. I began to drink heavier, try out different drugs, and sleep with twice as many girls as before. I would pleasure the men as often as I could, but I never was able to take it any further than what I had done with Xemnas. I wasn't sure why. It was as if there was something preventing me from going farther than the two of us had; some sort of un-seeable barrier set up by my subconscious.

It wasn't until I hadn't seen him for two whole weeks straight that I realized it; Xemnas wasn't coming back. I felt heartbroken, lost. I had no clue what I was supposed to do without him there. Sure, I had gained so much confidence, but it had always been with _him_ there.

I went into overdrive. The sex, the drugs, the alcohol; anything that could distract me from the empty feeling that had come to dwell in my chest. Besides, I didn't know anything else anymore. Because of Xemnas, this had become my life. I hadn't seen my other friends outside of class in months, Sora and I barely talked anymore, and my parents had seemingly given up on me. It was almost as if I had erased myself from their lives completely.

Then everything began to spiral downward even faster.

The night after I had realized that Xemnas wasn't coming back, Yuffie came up to me and told me that our relationship had run its course. "I mean, it's not like the two of us spend that much time together anyway so yeah," she had said. It was true, when we were at parties it was just like being around anyone else. There wasn't really a special connection between the two of us. Even when we'd had sex, there was nothing spectacular about it. Hell, I hadn't even lost my virginity to her. To me, sex with Yuffie was just another fuck; just another moment of short-term satisfaction. Unfortunately, short-term satisfaction was what I thrived on; my addiction.

I began to frequently wake up after being unconscious for god knows how long, not remembering where I was. In some instances I was naked, in others I was surrounded by people, sometimes it was both. I could feel my life slowly spinning out of control, but somehow I wasn't doing anything about it. I had given up my control, I had given it to Xemnas with that one fateful handshake, and now he was gone and unable to give it back. At least, that's how I felt.

I had been living in overdrive for over three months when I saw Xemnas again. I had decided to attend another out of town party, just hoping for some new faces to relieve the monotony that I was starting to feel from all of these same old parties. I walked in and immediately started getting drunk; my new routine over the past few months. That's when I saw him. I froze. There he was, sitting with a boy that looked slightly younger than I was. The two of them seemed to be having a casual conversation, but it was the look on the boy's face that got me. I saw so much adoration and admiration etched onto that naive face, and I realized that I had been that boy once. I had idolized that man sitting on that couch.

And then said man had left without a trace, after being sure that I was completely taken by him. Unconsciously, my feet began to walk towards the couch that the two of them were sitting on. I found myself standing in front of the both of them and they turned to look at me.

"Hello Roxas," Xemnas said, same sneer as always.

The boy looked at Xemnas questioningly. "Who is this?"

Xemnas chuckled and raised himself from the couch. He offered his hand to the boy and began to lead him back, farther into the house. "Oh, just someone I used to know," he said. And then he was gone.

I felt as if my feet were glued to the spot. Well, it had been one thing to guess that he was gone, but another thing entirely to see him willingly remove himself from having anything to do with me. So I did the only things I knew how to do anymore:

I drank.

And I smoked.

And I had sex.

And I told myself that this is what I did, and this was all I needed to do to feel whole again.

I was well into my senior year when it happened. I was at a local party, nothing out of the ordinary, when I passed out; again, nothing out of the ordinary, at least not as of late. However, when I came to I was definitely not familiar with where I was. I was almost completely stripped of my clothes, left in nothing but my boxers. My wallet was gone, my clothes were gone, everyone was gone. I got up and looked around. I wasn't even in anyone's house anymore, I was outside somewhere. "Fuck," I swore loudly, pounding headache now making my predicament even more aggravating. I decided I might as well start walking in some direction, maybe I'd learn where I had ended up. I didn't have a watch on me, but I had figured that it was sometime past midnight. I wasn't anywhere near the beach, as I couldn't hear the ocean waves crashing onto the shore, so I must be somewhere downtown. As I walked down the dark alleys of the downtown area I was trying to figure out which bastards would steal all my shit and then leave me out here. As I thought harder, I realized it could've been anyone. There wasn't anyone who particularly hated me, but at the same time I didn't really have any close friends that I partied with. Everyone was sort of, neutral. It was a sad understanding that suddenly made me feel very cold and lonely.

I continued down the turning alleys and underpasses until I came across a familiar road. Unfortunately, I was nowhere near my house. It was going to be a long night. My house was near downtown, but it was on the east side. I happened to be on the west side of town, which was notorious for gangs and muggers. I wasn't really thinking about anything other than how long it would take me to get home. I didn't even notice the group of guys that I walked by until they started to whistle and catcall.

"Hey there Blondie, how about you come over here and show us a good time?" one of them shouted in my direction. Ignoring them, I continued walking. I thought they had left me alone, until I felt a firm grip on my left arm. I was rapidly whipped around and came face to face with a greasy-haired man who was about a head taller than me. His eyelids were a little heavy and I could tell he'd been drinking.

"Let me go," I stated firmly, tugging from his grip.

"Nuh-uh angel, first we're gonna have some fun. Now come over here and put that tight ass to good use," he slurred. I saw his buddies coming closer, each with a similar expression across their faces. It was then that I really began to feel it; fear. I hadn't felt afraid in so long, I had dismissed it as an emotion I was too strong to feel now, but oh how I was wrong.

I was wrong, about so much.

"I said, let go!" I shouted, and kneed my attacker right between the legs. He wheezed and bent over, shuddering in pain.

"L-little bitch. You need to be taught some manners!"

With that, his other three companions began sprinting after me. I ran as fast as I could, ignoring the throbbing pain in my feet as they pounded across concrete. After running for a few blocks, the guys seemed to have lost interest, and I was running alone. I didn't stop running for a long time, not until I had comfortably crossed into the east side of town. I stopped to catch my breath and suddenly felt tears begin to flow ceaselessly from my eyes. I was surprised at first by the sudden action, but choked down a sob when I realized that I had wanted to cry, wanted to _feel_ for so long. So I sat there in the street, and cried.


	11. Chapter 11

Disclaimer: I dreamt I owned Kingdom Hearts, then I woke up and realized I was just a poor, obsessed fangirl.

Author's Note: This story's really moving along isn't it? Hope I don't disappoint!

So I think I'd like to dedicate this chapter to **Sensory Overload** for recommending a great song. She told me to look up **"Celebrity Status" by Marianas Trench**, and I must say it is a perfect theme for chapter 10. Seriously, you gotta check it out so you can agree with me. I ended up getting the whole album (Masterpiece Theatre) and as of late it's pretty much become my AkuRoku soundtrack. Ha ha! So thanks dear, I reallly appreciate it! This one's for you. :)

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After sitting on the rough pavement for what felt like hours, I wiped the remnants of my teary breakdown from the corners of my eyes and took a deep breath. I had my moment to wallow in self-pity. It was time to do something with myself. I slowly picked myself up off of the scathingly uncomfortable ground and continued my depressing journey towards home. I was cold, I was tired, I was in pain, but it was so much more than just those three simple words; cold, tired, pain.

I was cold from the lack of emotion that had numbed the past few months of my life. I'd been trudging along in a self-induced personality coma. I was cold from the lack of love in my life after abandoning my friends like a heartless bastard. It was a wonder that my insides hadn't frozen solid due to the frigidity of my recent attitude.

I was tired of living the life I had chosen. I was tired of spending my nights with all of these non-feeling people who wanted nothing more than a quick fix to convince themselves that they were truly happy. They thought that they were experiencing what it really felt to be alive, but all they were doing was living inside of an illusion.

I was in pain because I knew I had been one of them; I had been one of them for so long. I had played their silly game and won. I had played their silly game and lost. I was in pain because I had turned away those who really loved me without a second thought, convinced that my previous lifestyle was nothing compared to what I could truly obtain. I had wanted to change myself, to become someone different; someone _better_.

I hated who I had become.

The sun was starting to peek over the horizon when I finally reached my street. I was exhausted, dirty, and had a throbbing headache. As I reached the front porch of my family home, epitome of suburbia, I inwardly swore. I didn't have a house key anymore; it had been in my pocket. More disappointment. More disappointment and it was my own damn fault of course. I could feel the tears prickling at the corners of my eyes again, still so vulnerable after feeling like I had taken a breath of fresh air for the first time in months. I looked up to the second floor. My room faced the backyard, but my window was probably closed anyway. Sora's window was slightly ajar, which was usually the case. He enjoyed the sea breezes that drifted into his room when he left the window open.

I climbed up onto the railing that surrounded our front porch and hoisted myself up onto the roof. My arms were shaking as I lifted my body up from the railing and raised one leg to pull myself onto the slightly slanted surface. It wasn't an easy task, but I had done it before. This wasn't the first time I had come home like this, but this was the first time that it had been this bad.

And hopefully this was the last time.

As I gingerly crept towards Sora's window, I saw his alarm clock glowing from the table besides his bed. It read 5:39. I groaned quietly as I tried to slide stealthily into his room. Unfortunately my foot caught on the windowsill and I fell face first into the bedroom and landed in a heap on the floor.

"Shit," I said aloud, though slightly muffled from the carpet that I was currently face-to-face with. I immediately regretted speaking. Sora was an incredibly light sleeper and had already shot bolt upright, wide awake.

"Roxas? Is that you?" he asked. He walked towards the window and looked down at me as I curled up into a little ball on the floor. I knew that I must've looked horribly pitiful in my state; lying in a fetal position on my brother's floor, dirty and wearing nothing but an old pair of boxers. The look in his eyes was one of pity, compassion, and sorrow. I saw it and I felt my eyes brimming with restrained emotion once more. After so many months of pent up feelings, it all seemed to be coming out in a downpour now that I had unlocked the flood gates. I could see in his tired expression that I had caused my brother so much pain in these last few months; he was the most important person to me and I had hurt him. I let the tears flow freely from my eyes and he knelt down beside me. I felt his arms wrap around my shoulders as he pulled me into a tight embrace. I felt him trembling and I realized that he was crying too. The two of us sat there, holding each other and sobbing quietly as the room was gradually lit by fragile rays of sun as daybreak came forth in its entire splendor.

I was immediately snapped from my memory when the door to my dorm room was flung open and in stomped a very pissed off Hayner. I didn't spare him a second glance, this was pretty normal for him. Again, my friend had anger issues.

"Ugh, don't even start with me Roxas because I do _not_ want to talk right now, okay?" he snapped.

"Sure Hayner," I said. This was almost a routine. Something makes Hayner mad, he storms in our room, yells at me for nothing, and then proceeds to bitch to me for an hour about whatever's making him mad.

We sat there in silence for a few moments. I could almost count down the seconds in my head as to when he'd start the verbal rampage. 5…4…3…2…1…

"I just don't get what the fuck that guy's problem is," Hayner spat angrily.

"What guy?" I asked innocently, knowing that he'd be even angrier if I didn't participate in his silly routine.

"Who the fuck do you think? I'm talking about that bastard Seifer! He thinks he's so funny, he thinks he's so tough. I bet he wouldn't be half as cocky if he didn't have his little cronies hanging around him constantly. Seriously, what kind of guy needs that much backup _constantly_? A real pussy, that's who!" Hayner ranted. He honestly could have been ranting about blueberry muffins for all I cared, it was always the same.

"So what'd he do this time, Hayner?" I asked monotonously, allowing my gaze to return to my previous task of finding and tracing patterns in the ceiling.

"Well there I was, minding my own business, when Seifer and his little goons come out of nowhere and start harassing me and…"

Hayner continued talking, but I had successfully tuned him out. My thoughts now drifting back to those dreary days in high school; the days that centered on Xemnas to be exact. I hated the dark spot that this man had placed on my past, but hey, whatever doesn't kill you make you stronger, right?

The man had damaged me, that's for sure. He had lifted me up and let me down in the worst possible way. The thing about people that know how to make you feel good is that they are equally talented at knowing how to make you _hurt_. I knew I'd grown much more self-confident since he broke me down like he did, but I was still a work in progress. I'm not normally one to toot my own horn, but I'd managed to form a pretty good mask for the occasions when my confidence tended to slip. Maybe one day I'd be able to take it off completely, because I'd grown so tired of these silly games; the ones where I had to pretend I was someone else. I definitely wasn't playing the role of the popular high school Roxas anymore, but now I was sort of half-Roxas; there were still moments when I felt vulnerable and in desperate need of shelter, therefore escaping behind my own neutral façade. I've managed to accept the fact that I'm a work in progress. Ultimately I'd like to be comfortable just being me. I knew that the end result was visible from where I stood, but there were steps and obstacles in-between where I was and where I wanted to be.

On the day that I had tumbled through my brother's window for the last time, Sora and I had sat there crying for a good half hour or so before getting up and talking about everything. He told me about how worried he had been, and how everyone just wanted the old Roxas back. I winced when I heard this. It pained me to realize just how foolish I had been; there had been nothing wrong with me before. Why had I wanted to change myself so desperately?

As the two of us continued pouring our souls out to each other Sora had stuttered out at one point that he was so glad Riku had been there to reassure him that I'd come back eventually. To say that I was crushed would be a slight understatement. Don't get me wrong, I wasn't upset that Riku had been there to comfort him; that I was immensely thankful for. It's just that Sora and I were always the first one that the other went to when we were in serious need of some reassurance, and I had left him hanging without even the slightest hint if or when I'd be back. Not even that, I had been the cause of his anxiety. I felt subhuman.

I would have to thank Riku. He was probably upset with me, but I deserved it. He was so good for Sora, and I wanted to let him know that. I wanted to tell him how thankful I was for him. I'd been so foolish. I'd been searching for a way to feel, but my feelings, my _heart_, had been there all along; with my friends.

After our tearful reunion Sora and I had broken apart and simply sat in front of each other, hands joined as a comfortable connection as we began to talk. I told Sora about Xemnas, I told him about Yuffie and all of the partying, I told him about the sex, the drugs, the drinking. I noticed that a few more tears were starting to trail down his cheeks, but I couldn't stop. I had to tell him everything. I had to come completely clean. I told him about all of the times I had woken up in a strange place after being unconscious for god knows how long. I told him about all of the fake people with their fake smiles and their fake words. I told him about the night before when I had walked home from the west side of town in nothing but my boxers and was nearly raped by a bunch of nasty, scraggly men. This part had hurt Sora the most and he reached forward and wrapped his arms around me again. I patted him on the back as he sobbed softly into my shoulder, shushing him and telling him I was alright. I was alright now.

Everything was going to be alright now.

I had almost started crying again when I came back to school and saw everyone. It would take awhile for me to get over being as emotional as a pregnant woman. It was as if everyone knew that I had come back for good. It was like I had been lost, but now I was home. I was astounded by how quickly everyone had taken me back in; like I had never left. At first I had felt ashamed, not understanding why they hadn't decided to reprimand me for all of the horrible treatment I had subjected them to over the past few months. I had to be reassured again and again that they were too happy to see me back to normal again to be upset with me. This was truly where my real friends were. My life was becoming stable again, and I couldn't have been happier. Normalcy was all I wanted.

I had been totally and completely sober for over three months. No sex, no drugs, no nothing. The best part was that it wasn't even difficult for me to give up such habits. It was as if leaving behind that lifestyle had left everything with it. Things were almost entirely as they were before. Sure, there were slight variations. Sora and Riku were closer than ever, and I was truly happy for them. I just wished they would have sex at Riku's house more often because nobody deserves to hear their brother being pounded into a mattress in the same household. I was recovering fairly easily, and I had my friends to think. They were incredibly patient with me, understanding that we'd all have to adjust to each other again. I'd changed, they'd changed, and we'd been out of synch for far too long. The beautiful thing about true friendship is that those dear to you will always be willing to work through the problems, because they know that with a little cooperative effort we can all be happy again.

Riku had come over to our house one evening; a rather common occurrence. Our parents were out; another common occurrence. Basically it was an incredibly average day in spring. We were about three months away from graduating high school. Sora, Riku, and I were lying around the living room watching TV. I was lying across the floor in front of the screen while Sora and Riku shared the sofa. I didn't really want to watch the two of them getting all touchy-feely.

The doorbell rang and Sora leapt out of Riku's lap. "I got it!" he shouted.

"Geez Sora, we're both right here," I said, tenderly holding my ears. Sora stuck his tongue out at me before running over to the door to see who it was.

The door opened, but I couldn't hear if anything was being said. I didn't concern myself over it too much until it had been over a minute and there was still no sound from the front room. I turned around and Riku looked puzzled as well. The two of us got up and headed for the front door. As soon as I turned the corner into the kitchen, my eyes grew wide. I couldn't believe what I was seeing. I rubbed my eyes, as if trying to wake myself from some horrid nightmare.

There was Xemnas, in my house, and he had Sora backed into the kitchen counter.

Riku was the first to respond. "Who the fuck do you think you are?" he shouted, before pushing Xemnas out of the way and yanking Sora to his side in one swift motion. Sora was trembling as he clung to Riku's chest, and I could feel anger bubbling like lava deep down inside of me.

"What did you do to him, Xemnas?" I shouted at the sadistic man with the cold, yellow eyes. I felt my blood run cold as he slowly turned to face me. That sickeningly familiar sneer was now pointed in my direction.

"My new friend Sora and I were just having a little chat," he said coolly before looking over to Riku. "But it seems as if he's busy being someone else's toy."

Riku's eyes glared poisonous daggers at Xemnas, not wanting to shout more for fear of scaring the trembling boy that was clinging to him. I, however, had no reservations about yelling at the unwelcome man.

"You bastard. Get the fuck out of my house," I hissed.

"Come now, Roxas. Where did these harsh words come from? Don't you remember when you and I were friends?" He raised his hands in question, voice lulling in an attempt to sound concerned as he took a step closer in my direction. I involuntarily took a step backwards. "You came to me so eagerly, like a little puppy," Xemnas continued with a cruel smirk, slowly closing the distance between us as he strode across the kitchen. "I suppose I could tempt you with a little fun seeing as how your brother isn't interested," he sneered, now close enough to touch me. He reached up and stroked the side of my face. "I came here for you."

I flinched. "How did you find my house?" I asked furiously, hoping that if I kept him talking he'd cease his advances.

Xemnas sighed off-handedly, as if it were the simplest question in the world to answer. "I got directions from Yuffie. She didn't seem to have _any_ problem taking me up on my aforementioned offer," he added with a mirthless laugh as he continued to caress my face.

I felt myself literally shaking with anger and disgust. How had I let myself fall victim to this man? Was I that weak? Perhaps Xemnas took my violent shudders as shivers of pleasure, or maybe he simply enjoyed his effortless torture. Most likely it was the second one. My eyes grew wide as he began to play with my hair. "S-stop!" I stammered. His smile grew even wider after hearing me stutter. He could sense my discomfort. I took a step back, and then another, and then another. Xemnas was toying with me, but I was too terrified to stand my ground now. He was slowly advancing, and I found myself growing frantic. I wanted to run, but tripped during my clumsy attempt to turn around and fell onto the ground. I stared up at his towering figure, eyes wide, shaking more than ever. No. I didn't want this. Not anymore. I moved on. I wanted to move on!

"Stop."

I turned my head to see my brother, still holding onto Riku, but now with his face turned towards Xemnas. "You… will never hurt my brother ever again, now get out," Sora said, shakily but firm, eyes burning as they stared unmoving at the dark figure looming over me.

Xemnas merely chuckled. "I was growing bored of this little game of cat and mouse anyway. Perhaps another time, my little mouse," he said calmly as he turned to face me once more; and with one final sneer, he was gone.

Until today.

"…but he doesn't even have a reason for doing it! I mean seriously, it's not like I ever did anything to him to start this shit, at least not unless he starts it first!"

I shook my head and brought myself back into the conversation Hayner seemed to be having with himself.

"Uh-huh, yeah."

"You see? You agree with me. The guy's a total douche bag," Hayner stated.

I turned to face him directly before asking, "Hayner, this sounds exactly like the last time you complained about this guy. I thought the two of you would do something about this blatant sexual tension by now."

Hayner's face grew bright red, but somehow it wasn't nearly as extreme as usual. Instead of storming out of the room he simply stared at his lap. "I guess I just, don't really know what to do," he admitted, embarrassed. "I mean, I seriously _hate_ the guy. It's just… ugh, fuck."

I chuckled softly and he looked up at me furiously. I raised my hands in surrender, trying to prove that I wasn't laughing at his ineptitude. "Chill Hayner. You'll just… figure it out when the time comes, you know?" I told him. I honestly didn't know what else to say, or if my words were even true.

"Yeah, yeah. Whatever," He said as he sighed in defeat. Seconds later he had picked up his school bag again and was heading towards the door. "Well, I only stopped by to drop off some books. Later, Roxas," he said before exiting the room and leaving me in complete silence once more.

I sighed and rolled over onto my side. I felt my phone being crushed between my leg and the mattress from its place in my left pocket and then I remembered the text message I had received earlier. Flipping onto my back once more, I whipped out my phone and opened it up. "Axel the Sex God" was front and center on the display, and I laughed quietly to myself. I opened it and read the message he had sent about an hour ago.

_Hey roxie 3 the ride to my place was twice as awful without you there D': just wanted to reassure you that I did in fact make it back alive, and amazingly so did luxord_

I laughed again and thought for a moment before sending my reply.

_It's good that you didn't kill him, those orange jumpsuits in prison would totally clash with your hair._

I closed my phone and slipped it back in my pocket, not expecting an immediate reply due to my belated response. To my surprise, I felt my pants pocket vibrating again not long after I had put my phone away. I pulled it out again to read the next message.

_So when you think about me possibly going to prison for first-degree murder, the first thing you worry about is how my hair will look with my outfit? Wow roxas. Gay much?_

I could almost see that playful smile on Axel's face as I imagined him typing out his reply. Amazingly he was still able to be a condescending bastard even without vocal conversation. My thumbs tapped away at the small keyboard in my hands, my own smirk stretching across my face.

_Just don't drop the soap axel_

I hit send and lay my head back down, chuckling to myself. I was quite pleased with that comeback. Score one for me. My phone started vibrating again, but this time it was accompanied by my phone ringing as well, "Shake It" playing loudly from my little black phone. I looked at the screen and sure enough, I was being graced with a phone call from the "Sex God" himself. I smiled as I pressed the send button to answer the call and raising the phone to my ear.

"Texting not enough for you?" I asked teasingly.

_Nope,_ _I much prefer hearing your voice Roxas. Besides, I love seeing that cute little picture of you pop up every time I give you a call. Gives me a reason to see it, rather than just staring at it when I'm bored._

I placed a hand over my eyes. Shit, I had forgotten about that. "Ugh, Axel I look fucking retarded in that picture." I heard him laugh on the other end.

_Hmm, fucking retarded wasn't exactly the phrase I was looking for. Positively adorable seems to suit it better I think._

I rolled my eyes, knowing he couldn't see me. "Yeah, whatever. So what's up? I just saw you like an hour ago."

_Dunno, just felt like calling you. Do I need a reason?_

I laughed softly to myself. "Calling for no reason? That's not gay," I responded coyly.

_You're the one worrying about what I'm gonna wear to prison, Roxie babe._

"Oh fuck you."

_Ha ha. I'd like to see you try._

I felt my face heat up almost immediately. I could picture his cocky expression on the other end of the phone, and I almost wished he were there in front of me so I could punch him in his stupid, arrogant face. Instead I replied, "Yeah, I bet you would."

_Sure would, but you know I'd end up on top in the long run. You're just too delicious._

I heard Axel's low chuckle flow out from the phone and shivered. Fuck me; it is absolutely impossible _not_ to associate this man with sex appeal. "Did you just call to piss me off?" I asked angrily.

_Heavens no, Roxas! How could you accuse me of such a thing?_

I smiled bitterly at his poor attempt to sound victimized. Axel could not pull off sounding innocent for shit. I chuckled to myself before responding, "Stop trying to pretend you're innocent Axel, it doesn't suit you." I heard him almost purring into the receiver.

_Mmm, my Roxie wants me to be bad? Guess I can deal with that._

I quickly decided to change the subject. "So, Riku's gonna drive us tomorrow night. 7 o'clock. We'll come pick you up."

_Sounds perfect. So we're going on a double-date? How precious._

I scoffed. "If you wanna call it that, jackass."

_Woah woah, Roxas. Retract the claws. I'm just poking fun._

"Uh-huh," I answered. Axel wasn't really pissing me off (well, not too much), I just couldn't help that my temper seemed to flare from time to time. Maybe I'd been around Hayner a bit too much lately.

_The thought of going out on a date with you makes me positively delighted, Roxas. I can't help that it's so fun to push your buttons._

My heart fluttered, always eager to hear that he enjoyed being around me. "I wish that you'd find a different pastime, one that won't give me early gray hair," I sighed with a smile.

_Nah, too fun._

"Ass," I said, glad I couldn't see the smile growing on my lips.

_Now don't get your panties in a twist now, Roxas._

I snorted. "_You_ of all people should know that I don't wear panties."

_Hmm, that I do. Although I don't think I'd mind if you ever wanted to try a pair._

My mouth dropped. "Perv," I said darkly. Axel was positively relentless. I heard him laugh into the other end of the phone.

_You like it. Anyway, it's been super talking to you Roxie, but I think I hear Demyx coming home. I've gotta go chew him out for abandoning us at Marly's house. See you tomorrow Blondie._

"Alright, just don't make him cry," I responded. I heard a quick laugh from the other end before the call ended. I glanced at the phone before setting it down on my stomach. I stretched my arms back behind my head and laughed to myself over the mental image of Axel and Demyx fighting over last night. The two of them were a little flamboyant; I wouldn't be surprised if it turned into some sort of cat fight.

I allowed myself to simply lie there in silence for a while, cherishing one of the few instances in which I was not surrounded by people. I loved being around my friends of course, but everyone needs "me time" once in a while.

Hmm. Maybe I had grown up a bit.

I thought about Xemnas and wondered why he had shown up today. I wondered if he really was going to come and find me again.

I thought about Axel and wondered why I had let him get under my skin so easily. Had I not been so pleased with the fact that the two of us were finally getting somewhere with our "relationship", I might've been upset with myself for being so intimately reckless with another individual. Obviously it hadn't turned out so hot with Xemnas, but this just felt different. I hoped I was right.

I thought about Hayner and his love/hate relationship with some guy I didn't know. I thought about Sora and his seemingly perfect relationship with Riku. I thought about Demyx and Zexion and their weird sort of bond that didn't make sense in the slightest. I thought about Kairi and wondered if she'd ever stop trying to take care of everyone else and find herself a boyfriend again. I thought about Larxene and how bitter she'd been when she'd approached Axel and me at the party.

I thought about Namine and wondered how she was doing in Radiant Garden. I also briefly wondered when she had developed the freaky yaoi fetish. I didn't remember a defining moment signifying the transition from sweet little Namine to yaoi fangirl, but it had happened somewhere along the line. I thought about Axel's other friends that I had met last night, I thought about home and wondered how my parents were doing, I thought about my other friends who had gone off to other schools, I thought about myself and wondered if from the outside looking in it seemed like I was living the bittersweet, liberated, ideal college life that people seemed to idolize.

Mostly though, I thought about Axel.


	12. Chapter 12

Disclaimer: Don't own Kingdom Hearts, though I'm seriously looking forward to owning a copy of 358/2 days once it comes to America in a couple of months. :D

Author's Note: Wow, this chapter was really weird. First it took forever to be written, and second it didn't come out like I'd originally intended at all! Seriously. I had all of these ideas for this chapter and then my fingers went to work and created something entirely different. I didn't like it at first, but I think after some editing this chapter's grown on me. I guess all of my previous ideas for chapter twelve will just have to be pushed back into chapter thirteen. This story's getting so long guys! It's crazy! Alright I'll stop talking so you call can read the story now (if you haven't already skipped over this practically useless author's note). Ha ha. Enjoy!

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Despite my somewhat traumatic experience from yesterday, I had managed to stay up watching random youtube videos until the wee hours of the morning, dropping dead from exhaustion at around 3 o'clock (I think). Being that I am a ridiculously heavy sleeper, I didn't even fidget when Hayner's alarm (apparently) went off at 9 o'clock this morning. Olette had planned a beach day for everyone, insisting that they leave by 10 at the latest. I had politely declined, but Kairi, Hayner, and Selphie had excitedly picked up on the idea. Summer was fast-approaching and most everyone had been itching to soak up the first few rays of some summer sunshine out at the local beach. Hayner had poked fun at me yesterday for choosing to stay behind, saying I needed the extra time to "prepare for my hot date" as he had so tastefully put it. I had just smiled sweetly at my incredibly juvenile roommate and told him to enjoy his ladies' day out, making sure to relish the scowl he'd shot me.

When I had finally regained consciousness after a pleasantly uninterrupted night's sleep in a near catatonic state, I rolled over to check the time on my alarm clock. It was almost 1 in the afternoon. Yep, I was most definitely _not_ a morning person. I stretched out across my bed and kicked off the sheets. The weather was warming up as we crept closer and closer towards the infamously hot and humid Twilight Town summer, and the tornado of blankets that I had formed into some sort of cloth cocoon overnight was really starting to make me sweat.

I swung my legs to the left until they were dangling over the side of the bed. Yawning, I hopped down from my elevated mattress and stumbled over to my closet to dig out my shower stuff. I figured that being pelted in the face with warm water would wake me up, if only somewhat. I gathered my shampoo and whatnot in my arms and lazily walked out the door towards the communal bathroom down the hall. I didn't really have a problem with walking there in nothing but my boxers; the floor was entirely male after all. Besides, it was a Saturday afternoon; the dorms were almost completely devoid of human life.

I stepped into the empty bathroom and headed over to turn on the good shower. I kicked off my undergarments rather carelessly and walked in. After standing under the spray for a few minutes, I had woken up significantly. I allowed myself a few moments to simply enjoy the warm water beating against my skin before I sought out my arsenal of shower goods.

Once I'd thoroughly cleaned myself, I proceeded through my usual post-shower routine: walk back to room, fix hair, get dressed, etc. I checked the time and decided to head to the dining hall for a late (really late) lunch. Clad in a gray v-neck and black skinny jeans, I slipped into my favorite black converses and left the cramped little sanctuary once more. Might as well get some food if it's paid for. I internally praised whatever deity was up there that my parents had agreed to pay for my school expenses while I was an undergraduate. TTU wasn't terribly expensive, but I could rest easy knowing I wouldn't be wasting years of my life paying off student loans once I'd gotten my bachelor's degree. I was constantly worshipping my pre-existing college fund.

As the automatic doors to the dingy little eating area opened, I was greeted with the image of a nearly deserted dining hall. I temporarily handed off my ID to be swiped by an anonymous student who was working the door and stepped cautiously through the turnstile. The girl, looking nearly bored to tears, handed back my card and I continued forward towards the vast rows of horrendously mediocre food.

As I gazed into the heat-lamp illuminated assortment of glorified cafeteria food, I decided I wasn't feeling particularly daring today. Might as well stick to something safe. Like spaghetti. Spaghetti was very safe. I grabbed a plate off of the top of the leaning pile of dinnerware and dumped a spoonful or two of the mass of red-stained noodles onto the circular platter until I was satisfied. Making sure to grab a fork out of the nearby utensil rack, I walked over to a particularly uninteresting table. Sitting down, I looked up momentarily to take in the rest of the room. There were a couple of girls sitting at a table in the far corner, chatting excitedly about something. Their incessant giggling was about the only noise that resonated through the empty room, save for the muffled hum of the kitchen appliances coming from the back and the occasional clash of dishware as the employees cleaned and prepared for the next meal. Two tables away from mine sat a dark-haired guy in his pajamas. A gray beanie was smashed onto his head, causing greasy black strands of hair to stick out every which way from underneath the constricting cap. His feet were propped up on the table, thumbs clicking away at his cell phone while a half-finished bagel accompanied by an empty bowl of what I'd assumed was once cereal occupied the space in front of him. It was sickeningly obvious that not many people bothered to stay on-campus during the weekends, and I didn't blame them. There really wasn't much to do here.

I sighed, expression magnificently neutral. Twirling my fork through the lukewarm pile of noodles, I collected enough for a decent-sized bite and began eating. I wasn't particularly hungry, but I knew that I would be soon enough. It would probably be better to fill my still-sleeping stomach now rather than deal with its noisy complaints in a couple of hours. My mind drifted off as I continued to mindlessly munch on the astoundingly average spaghetti I'd picked out. I didn't need to be ready to head to the pier with everyone until 7, so what was I supposed to do until then?

I could do homework, but I chose to stick by my temporary motto. "It isn't homework unless it's due tomorrow."

Hayner had run off with Selphie, Kairi, and Olette, so that left me four friends short for the time being.

I really had no idea what my brother and Riku were up to. I was almost afraid to find out. Over the years I'd been unintentionally trained to approach the two of them with the utmost caution after way too many incidents in which I'd walked in on an incredibly awkward and/or uncomfortable situation involving the two of them against some sort of horizontal (and sometimes vertical) surface. One really had to give fair warning when hunting down Sora and Riku; otherwise they'd be greeted with a possibly mentally-scarring scene played out in front of them.

I could call Axel, but I really didn't want to seem too clingy. My pride simply wouldn't allow it. I'd just talked to the crazy redhead yesterday, and I'd be seeing him again in about five hours anyway. I could live without talking to the guy for the time being. Heaven knows I'd get enough to last me for a while later. Axel was a handful. Pun intended? Maybe…

I sighed, playing with the last few strands of limp pasta on my plate. Maybe I'd go for a walk or something. That sounded like the most feasible task after going through my options. Getting up from my seat, I carried my dirty dishes over to the kitchen window and left them to be cleaned. I shoved my hands into my pockets and left the building, turning towards the garden nearby. As I walked under the flowery arch marking the entrance into the peaceful oasis, I stopped for a moment to think. It'd been about a week now since I'd last come in here; escaping the taunting of my friends while also hunting down Hayner in his sexually confused state. Had it really only been that long?

Was it really only a week ago that I'd foolishly wandered into that awful little sex shop downtown? I almost couldn't believe it. So it'd only been six or seven days now since Axel and I had been "reunited," so to speak? This threw me for a loop. It seriously seemed like it had been so long ago. How had everything moved so _fast_? I shook my head a little, as if to physically rid myself of this newfound feeling of vertigo. Willing my feet to move, I slowly entered the garden and began my afternoon stroll.

I was barely aware of where I was going as my feet carried me through the quiet garden, following the rustic-looking path laid out before me. I didn't even take in the breathtaking scenery as I lost myself in my own thoughts. I hadn't come across anyone else so far, but if another person had wandered past me I might not have noticed anyway. I had the uncanny ability to completely immerse myself in whatever I was thinking about; totally blocking out the rest of the world. It was both a gift and a curse.

I continued to wonder in disbelief over the fact that one week ago I hadn't even been thinking about Axel. Last Saturday I had been out shopping with Kairi and Olette, letting them drag me around the mall for a few hours before driving out to the Sora's work for dinner (we'd always ask to sit in his section and in return, he'd sneak us some free dessert). And Sunday, well, I had vaguely considered going downtown. My curiosity had been growing more and more hungry ever since I had innocently wandered past Blush the week before, barely giving it a second glance as I was dragged around by Namine (who had been visiting) and Kairi.

Hmmm, maybe that's when that horrendous outfit Kairi had revealed just two days ago had been passed along from sister to sister. I shuddered at the thought.

I had only vaguely acknowledged the store at first, not even realizing at first what kind of wares it held. It was only after we'd been walking a bit farther down the road that my brain caught up with the rest of me, displaying previously unseen images into my head of erotic posters lining the walls inside the store. Apparently that quick glance I'd taken through the window had gotten me more than I'd bargained for.

Well obviously I had acted on my strange desire to return to the shop, but never in my wildest dreams did I fathom that I would run into Axel; especially not there. Seriously, I mean, the guy had been out of my life for _months_.

Roxas wanders in embarrassing store. Axel catches him. Roxas is fucked. I replayed the scene from that day in my head almost reluctantly. I had been trying to repress the memory, but it all seemed rather pointless now. The day hadn't gone on _so_ bad. We'd talked, we'd exchanged numbers, we'd kissed. I barely noticed my fingers as they ghosted across my lips distractedly at this thought. What kind of situation had I turned up in? I knew Axel last semester, sure, but as a _friend_. I mean, I'd be lying if I were to say that I hadn't felt attracted to the guy during our brief time together, but it didn't explain how things had moved so quickly after our freakishly accidental reunion.

I stopped my mindless stroll for a moment, a new thought entering my mind. Perhaps… perhaps Axel had also regretted not making a move sooner? Maybe I wasn't the only one who had felt the obvious pull towards the other while we would talk and joke around good-naturedly in that stuffy classroom months ago. Could that explain this seemingly reckless and fast-paced relationship the two of us had thrown ourselves into? Was it some sort of mutual desire to not let the opportunity slip away this time around? Perhaps not, but I felt like it made sense. Well, more sense than anything else I'd come up with. How else would you explain everything we'd done so far?

Sunday we're kissing, Wednesday we're flirting (and I'm not-so-secretly going nuts over his voice over the phone apparently), Thursday we're having mind-blowing sex, and then Friday we're cuddling and planning dates? What the hell? It's like a fairytale on crack.

I could only imagine what kind of show I must've put on for any other garden patrons who might've walked by. My brow was furrowed in deep thought as I scratched at my head with both of my hands. Occasionally I'd throw my head back in exasperation, making a disgruntled sort of noise. Really, thinking about all of this was beginning to give me a headache. None of it made any _sense_.

My previously uninterrupted silence was temporarily broken when I heard the familiar noise of muffled voices ahead. Unfazed, I continued my leisurely stroll forward. It didn't bother me in the slightest that there were other people enjoying the garden's splendor; I was tuning out the rest of the world just fine, that is, until I saw just whose voices I'd heard.

The distant but sickeningly familiar silhouette of a slender, blonde-haired woman entered my vision as I neared a bend in the road. Larxene; Axel's vicious ex-girlfriend. I was surprised to discover that I actually recognized her companion as well; it was Marluxia (the fruitcake), pink locks gently swaying as he nodded his head in response to whatever the former had said. The two of them were standing over a small bed of roses, Marluxia's eyes leaving his companion's face every moment or so to look down upon the delicate flowers with an almost loving expression.

I had every intention of turning around and pretending this had never happened, but as luck would have it, Larxene turned her head just as I was about to stop and locked those poisonous green eyes with mine. Her lips curled upwards into a terrifying grin as she skipped towards me; faux innocence leaking off of her features, distorted only by her far from amicable facial expression. I hardly registered the fact that Marluxia had followed her; my eyes were locked on the liquid venom that seemed to pool in her eyes, disrupted by solid black pupils. I solidified my expression into a scowl as Larxene came to a halt in front of me, hands on her hips.

"Well well well, if it isn't dear Axel's new plaything," she chided, voice disgustingly sweet.

I continued glaring at her. So far today hadn't felt really good or bad, just sort of… gray. Now however, I felt it leaning precariously towards bad. "What are _you_ doing here?" I asked scathingly. Had I not been filled with nothing but contempt for the woman, I might be ashamed of myself for growing such a strong dislike for someone after only meeting them once. Really, it wasn't like me. Still, Larxene did not try to befriend me in any way, shape, or form. She was openly hostile towards me, so why shouldn't I act the same? And maybe jealousy had a _little_ something to do with it too…

Larxene laughed, sounding creepily childish. "Silly boy, I can go wherever the hell I want. So where's your fuck-buddy? Gone already? Did he find someone more interesting? Or maybe someone who's gone through puberty?" she mocked, eyebrows drawn up in mock sympathy.

"Aw, hurt that he likes some prepubescent _kindergartener_ more than he likes a bitchy twat?" To my delight, Larxene was suddenly taken aback. I guess she didn't expect the "plaything" to bite back. Inside I rejoiced victoriously, but on the outside I thought it was probably better if I just left now and called this battle a win for me.

I scoffed at the blonde she-devil as I turned around, wanting nothing more than to walk back to my room and blast music into my headphones. Something angry-sounding preferably. Hearing other people screaming somehow made me feel better, as if I were channeling my frustration through them. I flinched as I felt a dainty hand grasp my shoulder angrily, wincing with pain as long fingernails dug deeply into my skin. I was roughly turned back around and faced with furious green eyes.

"Now listen here you little pansy, you're nothing more than an easy lay to him. Axel's nothing more than a whore, fucking anything on two legs. You better count your blessings that I'm kind enough to warn you before you get in too deep. You mean absolutely _nothing_ to him, kid," she spat viciously, eyes hardened in rage. It wasn't difficult to see why she and Axel were no longer together; he'd dumped her, and from the looks of it, it seemed like _she_ had been the one who'd been the easy lay.

I yanked my shoulder away from her hold and glared at her. "I hold no interest in the preaching of a bitter, jealous bitch," I retorted.

Larxene held my glare for a moment longer before it melted into one of sick pleasure. She threw her head back, long strands of hair bobbing as she let loose another spine-tingling laugh. Wiping her eyes, she leered at me again.

"Oh what a horribly naïve boy! You think you're _special_! If you think I'm the only other person Axel's slept with then you're horribly mistaken. I couldn't even count the number of guys and girls he's been with, and those are only the ones I know about," she cooed, fanning herself and faking a yawn.

Not backing down, I continued to stare daggers at her as well. "So what?" I barked. "It's not like I expected him to be some sort of Prince Charming; people have flaws, people have _pasts_."

Obviously growing disturbed by how little she was making me squirm, Larxene huffed and turned around. It looked as if she was about to stomp away when she looked at me once more over her shoulder, grinning slyly. "Well, can't say I didn't try," she chirped before turning her head forward once more and walking off.

I rolled my eyes, unseen by the obnoxious blonde. Sure, I had assumed that Axel wasn't a virgin, and I definitely wasn't surprised by the fact that he'd fucked Larxene, but I really wasn't miffed by the fact that he'd slept around. I mean, who am _I_ to judge?

"She's right you know," a disembodied voice cooed, bringing me out of my reverie. I snapped my head to the left, features relaxing once I saw the pink-haired man from before. I'd forgotten that he'd been watching the whole exchange, though I was somewhat surprised that he was still here.

"Yeah, yeah. Why are you still here Marluxia?" I asked the taller male, eyebrows drawn together. I wasn't really sure what I thought of the man yet. He seemed to be switching sides in my mind; one minute the guy seemed alright, and the next he was hanging out with mega-bitch.

Ignoring my question he continued, "You think Axel just _magically_ happened upon my bedroom the other night when you two were so wrapped up in your little horny rampage? He's not a fucking fairy princess." A brief image of Axel in a fairy outfit skirted through my mind, but I quickly tore the sinful thought from my brain. Marluxia shook his head, hair swinging from side to side. Man, this guy loved to hear himself talk. "It's easy to find someplace once you've been there before, multiple times if I may add."

I groaned, dragging my fingers through my hair in distress and feeling slightly nauseous. "Marluxia I seriously do _not_ want any scarring mental images of the two of you doing the nasty right now, please. I don't think my brain could handle it," I said. I certainly did not want to imagine Axel with anyone so… pink.

Continuing his self-motivated tirade, Marluxia rambled on. "And don't think I didn't see my bottle of lube on the floor! Bastard thinks he can just march on in and do whatever the fuck he wants just cuz we got frisky a couple of times. I'm just glad he didn't use any of my other sexual… equipment."

"O-_kay_ that's enough! No one's happier than I am that he didn't decide to use any of your little trinkets with me," I said, hands moving up to cover my ears, hoping to somehow prevent the entrance of horrible, awful scenarios involving… dare I say it… _Marluxia's_ sex toys. It gave me the creeps just thinking about it. "It's one thing to know your… boyfriend's had sex with other people, it's another thing entirely to have to incorporate details," I added sharply, glaring at the pink-haired fruitcake.

Marluxia merely raised one well-groomed eyebrow. "Boyfriend?"

I looked up at him dumbly. Boyfriend? Had I called Axel my boyfriend? I quickly tried to collect myself and come up with an answer presentable for the man. "Er, well, he said he wanted to see me again so… I didn't know what to call us. I guess," I trailed off, absently scratching the back of my head as I found a nearby patch of grass to be incredibly interesting. I hoped the pink-haired diva hadn't noticed the slight blush creeping onto my cheeks. _Boyfriend?_

"Hmm," Marluxia hummed, tapping his pointer finger against the side of his face as he looked down on me. "That's certainly not uncommon for the promiscuous redhead, but then again, there are many who don't make it past the date; or first _fuck_ I suppose I should say,"

I threw my hands up exasperatedly. "Whoop-de-fuckin-do!" I exclaimed before turning to leave. This was getting old really fast. Why was being with Axel such a big deal? First my friends were tormenting me about it, now these lunatics were badgering me about his previous sex record? Jesus. I definitely wasn't expecting perfection, but why was everything so fucking complicated?

"If it makes you feel any better, my bets are on you my little sunflower!" Marluxia called after me. I almost stopped right there, spine tingling from the obvious creeper vibes I was feeling from this man. Did he just call me his little sunflower? I shuddered, but kept walking. Coming into the garden had been a mistake. It seemed that nothing I did anymore could remain anything close to remotely normal. Perhaps I'd spend the next few hours just staring at the wall, at least then I wouldn't have to worry about any crazy blonde-haired chicks or lecherous pink-haired men hunting me down and ruining my life.

I stormed back to my dorm after my brief encounter with the odd couple in the garden, but my anger slowly began to dissipate as I entered the quiet atmosphere of my room. I took a deep breath through my nose and exhaled loudly, calming myself down. I smiled as I took in the obvious lack of human life in the small space. One thing bad about living on-campus was the immediate loss of privacy. Oh, how I missed having my own room. I hadn't had to share a room since Sora and I were five years-old, and reverting back to that old circumstance almost felt like I was being pushed back in time. Standing in the center of the small enclosing, I simply cherished one of the few moments in which this was truly _my _room.

Sighing contentedly, I flopped backwards onto my bed and lie there for a moment or two. Once I had gotten over the brief euphoria of being utterly alone, I flipped over onto my stomach and crawled towards my desk. Opening the top drawer, I rummaged through until I found my ancient ipod, still in working order after three long years. I turned it on and scrolled through the artists, briefly wondering what kind of music to listen to. I wasn't looking for anything angry anymore, as I'd calmed down from my momentary surge of hatred. Settling on The Rolling Stones, I closed my eyes and relaxed into the surface that I had been hibernating on only three hours ago.

I blinked stupidly, Sora's face hovering mere inches from mine as his mouth opened and closed again, no sound coming out. I looked at him quizzically, before realizing that my ear buds were still jammed deep within my ears, music long since stopped due to the fragile battery of my decrepit mp3 player. I rubbed my eyes as I sat up, gently pushing Sora out of my personal bubble.

"What time is it?" I asked drowsily, surprised that I had managed to doze off after about ten hours of sleep the night before.

"What time is it? Roxas, it's past 6:30! You _were_ planning on coming along with us, right?" Sora replied, eyes rolling.

I bolted off of the bed. "Shit! Fuck, sorry Sora I just, shit!" I stuttered out as I stumbled off of the bed, frantically trying to gather my wits and get ready in about ten minutes flat. After frantically scrambling around the room for a good ten seconds, I stopped and rubbed my palms against my eyes, forcing myself to calm down and focus on not being a complete and total idiot.

I heard a soft chuckle and turned my head sharply towards the noise, neck nearly straining with the abrupt effort. Riku was sitting cross-legged on Hayner's bed, back against the wall as he held an opened magazine in his hand. He most certainly did not seem to be laughing at the magazine however, as his aquamarine eyes were staring in my direction as they danced with an amused sparkle.

"Deep breaths, Roxas," Riku taunted, breathing dramatically like a pregnant woman going into labor. I shot him a 'Roxas is not amused' glare, but took his advice nevertheless (though not quite so theatrically). After calming down my abruptly awoken heart rate, I looked around. What did I still need to do anyway? I was dressed. I walked over to the small mirror hanging on my closet door and checked my hair. It was a little messy, but that wasn't really anything new. I ran my hands through it a few times, then pulled away satisfied. I patted my pants; wallet and phone were still wedged in their respective pockets. I looked up at Sora as he stared at me; arms folded and foot tapping as he arched one thin eyebrow in my direction.

I shrugged. "Guess I'm ready," I offered.

Sora merely rolled his eyes again, but smiled this time. He reached out his hand and grabbed my elbow, pulling me towards the door. "C'mon," he said. "Let's go get your boyfriend."

I smiled and let Sora lead me from the room, Riku following close behind. The three of us walked down the hallway, exiting through the grungy stairwell at the end of the building and journeying down towards the first floor. Once we reached the bottom, we took the door on the right that lead outside and burst forward into the fresh night air.

I stopped briefly once we'd gotten outside to take in the aromatic pre-summer atmosphere of the evening air. I took a deep, cleansing breath. Summer days in Twilight Town may be hotter than hell, but the nights were just perfect. I suppose when the dreadful season did eventually hit it wouldn't be all that bad.

I ran to catch up with my brother and his boyfriend, trailing behind them and pulling my phone out of my pocket. I decided I should send Axel a quick warning text at least, make sure he wasn't napping too or something.

_Coming to get you_

I flipped the phone shut and stuffed it in my pocket. My eyes lit up once we neared Riku's car. I let out a low moan as I skipped over to it and draped my arms over the top; fingers trailing against the smooth, black surface.

"Ohhhh so beautiful," I groaned, eyes closing.

Riku snorted as he unlocked the car with his small remote. "Roxas please don't drool all over Cupcake."

I jolted upright, as if propelled backwards by some electric shock. I stared wide-eyed at the silver-haired teen before breaking into a fit of laughter. "Cupcake? What the _fuck_ kind of name is that? Man Riku, you are gay!" I choked out between hysterics.

Sora turned around in the front seat to glare at me as I clutched my stomach, still outside of the car. "_I_ named it you jerk. I think it's cute."

Laughter calming slowly, I slid into the seat behind Sora, still shaking somewhat with laughter. "Oh, you named it Sora? Figures," I responded, trying my best to steady my voice.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Sora snapped, growing defensive.

Riku merely reached over and patted the brunette's arm tenderly as he started the car. He turned around to watch out the back windshield as he backed out of his parking spot. "Roxas just doesn't understand dear, don't mind him."

I had barely registered what Riku had said. My attention was focused on the brief vibration coming from my right leg. I pulled out my phone and grinned, flipping it open. Axel's reply was short and sweet.

_Can't wait ;)_

"Alright Roxas, where to?" Riku asked from the front as he steadily approached the parking lot's exit.

I leaned back in my seat and smiled. "You're gonna wanna turn left here."


	13. Chapter 13

**Disclaimer:** I still don't own Kingdom Hearts. It is most unfortunate.

**Author's Note:** Wow you guys, I'm positively amazed by how many people seem to be reading this story now. I'm crying tears of joy here! Ha ha. Seriously though, the last chapter got seventeen reviews. Seventeen! Most I've ever gotten for one chapter! Blush was also recently added to a community for the first time ever! It's called **Axel&Roxas ~ The unbreakable Bond** and I recommend you have a look. So as it stands we've got **117** reviews, **7,333** hits, **59** favorites, and **90** alerts for Blush. You guys are amazing! You make me want to hunt you all down and kiss the daylights out of you! But enough of that, here's a ridiculously long chapter for all of you! Hope you like!

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It wasn't hard to spot Axel as we pulled up in front of the apartment complex I'd briefly visited once before. Clad in nearly all black (that seemed to be a favorite color of his from what I'd observed) he was leaning casually against the side of the building, arms folded across his chest as he stared blankly off to his right. His bright red hair made him stick out like a sore thumb against the melancholy backdrop of off-white stucco. He was wearing the same black zip-up that he'd worn at Marluxia's party, only this time it was over a solid green t-shirt that really _really_ complemented his eyes beautifully. Skinny jeans seemed to be all he owned in the pants department, but I certainly wasn't gonna complain about that. Regardless of how gay I felt checking out Axel's attire, I liked his taste; simple yet stylish.

As Riku's car crept closer, the redhead snapped out of his temporary stupor and glanced in our direction. I saw the excited gleam in his eyes as he surveyed the approaching vehicle. My heart fluttered in my chest a little.

Riku stopped the car and I unbuckled to scoot over into the seat behind his. Axel climbed in through the back right door that I'd been leaning on only seconds before, winking at me as he did. I threw him a smirk which he only returned in full force, all in a matter of seconds. Axel whistled as he closed the door and searched over his shoulder for the elusive seatbelt. "Nice car," he said, voice dripping with obvious admiration.

Riku smirked in the rear-view mirror. "Thanks," he replied before returning his focus to the road and propelling the small black car forward with calm composure.

Slinging his left arm casually across my shoulders, Axel pulled me as close as our seatbelts would allow. I half fell towards him, unprepared as I was, but he smoothly guided by body so that it fit snugly against his. To say that I was shocked by this abrupt display of affection would be putting it lightly. He gently turned my face towards his and my vision was entirely swallowed by those green eyes. My breath hitched in my throat. My mind was still trying to catch up with the rest of me. Pressing his forehead against mine with a little effort, Axel brought his face closer until our lips were nearly touching. I felt my eyelids descend unintentionally as he whispered softly, "How's my favorite little blonde?"

My face was heating up rather quickly due to the close proximity. I could feel his breath mingling with mine, tasting that unusually addicting taste that seemed to epitomize the man sitting before me. I felt his left hand slowly snaking up to thread fingers through my hair while its partner began rubbing lazy circles just above my hipbone. Slightly annoyed, I wondered if he was planning on breathing on my lips all night or if he was gonna _do_ something for crying out loud. "I'm not little," I murmured, eyes slipping shut and taking the initiative. I pressed forward hungrily to take that tempting mouth with my own. My mind had seemingly erased the fact that I was sitting in the backseat of a car that belonged to my brother's boyfriend, while said brother sat next to him in the passenger's seat.

Breaking the kiss much earlier than I'd have liked, Axel chuckled warmly against my lips. "Oh I know _that_ Roxas. You definitely don't need to compensate for anything."

I blushed at his lewd comment before being distracted by a throat clearing from the front seat. The two of us broke apart as Sora turned around, frustrated expression on his face as he looked at Axel, eyebrows furrowed together in a slightly peeved expression. "Now now, no molesting Roxas in the backseat. That's a rule," he scolded rather seriously.

The redhead raised two fingers in a salute. "Yes sir!" he confirmed, relaxing back into his seat as he pulled away from our very brief and very unexpected moment of intimacy. Seemingly satisfied, Sora turned back around and began chattering away to Riku about something in one of his art classes.

Casting a sideways glance in my direction, Axel's lips quirked upward into that lazy smirk that I had grown to like a bit too much. I smiled and leaned back in my seat, turning my head to stare out the window. I tried to watch all of the lights and buildings as we drove by, but it was impossible. Each new sight that entered into my line of vision was lost nearly as quickly as it had come.

I felt a gentle touch on my right hand and I turned around to see Axel's long fingers tracing circles across the knuckles as he leaned back into the seat. His eyes were closed and he looked quite content. Part of me wished I could take a picture of him this way; so relaxed and carefree. Almost like when I had watched him sleeping. Part of me said that I was being creepy.

I loved this about Axel. The two of us could just sit next to each other like this and not feel obligated to talk or kiss or dry hump or whatever horny adolescents tend to do when they're together. The space, the silence, it was all completely comfortable. Just a gentle touch shared between lovers, but it was all we needed in this moment. I took a moment to revel in the fact that never before had I been able to feel this relaxed in any sort of relationship I'd been in previously. It was refreshing beyond belief.

It wasn't long until Sora had grown tired of talking Riku's ear off about some project he was doing in his painting class. He turned around in his seat, looking at Axel and me with an expression that just screamed "entertain me" as he smiled a toothy grin. "Sooo Roxas would you like me to update you on the latest gossip back home, or would you rather I drill your date here for background information?"

I snorted. "He's all yours," I said with a wave, relinquishing Axel to Sora's barrage of intrusive questions. Perhaps I should've felt remorseful, but it was either him or me. Whenever Sora went off on one of his high school gossip tangents, it took a miracle (or Riku) to get him out of it. So instead, I sent the lamb to the slaughter. Well, I don't know how much of a lamb Axel really was.

Grinning with anticipation, Sora shifted slightly in his seat to face Axel instead of me. The redhead merely smiled and crossed one leg over the other. I was inwardly thankful that he hadn't stopped his gentle circles across my hand. I felt a smile flicker across my features as I readied myself for the show.

"Alrighty," Sora began. "So Axel, what's your major?"

"Film," the redhead answered dutifully with a smile. "And yours?"

"Art," Sora laughed. "But this isn't about me; we want to learn more about _you_," he said, emphasizing his point by jabbing a finger at the lanky redhead.

"Alright, what do you wanna know, dear Sora?" Axel responded smoothly, ceasing his ministrations across my knuckles to lace our fingers together instead. I looked down at our conjoined hands and I saw his smile grow a few centimeters out of the corner of my eye.

"Well," Sora began, tapping a finger against his chin thoughtfully, "Where are you from?"

I turned my body towards the redhead, genuinely curious to hear his answer. I realized that I really didn't know much about Axel other than the fact that he was a film major and apparently a bit of a manwhore.

"I'm from… The Land of the Dragons!" Axel said in a mystical voice, eyes wide as he slowly extended his right hand away from his body, making a sweeping motion with his palm as if to accentuate his point. It kind of reminded me of Aladdin during "A Whole New World" while he flew Jasmine around on the magic carpet, not that I've seen that movie a million times or anything.

Sora was eating this up, eyes as wide as saucers as he stared at the redhead in wonder. "Really?" he asked, mouth agape.

Axel nodded, obviously entertained by Sora's mystified reaction. "So is it as amazing as people say it is?" Sora asked with childlike excitement, slightly bouncing in his seat.

"Oh, even better!" Axel said, mystical voice back again. I turned my face away momentarily to hide my amused expression from my twin brother. Sora was taking in every single word that fell from Axel's lips. Poor kid hadn't been anywhere besides Twilight Town and back home on Destiny Islands. He probably thought that The Land of the Dragons actually had dragons flying around.

Sora's eyes were sparkling as he leaned closer. I swear he looked like he was about to wet himself he was so excited. I bit down on my knuckle as I tried to hold in a laugh that was threatening to burst forth. Axel's smile only widened as he continued the role of the raconteur. "Are there really giant mountains covered in snow year-round? And a huge palace? And swirls of cherry blossoms every spring? And a giant wall that stretches for miles and miles and miles?" Sora asked excitedly, bouncing slightly in his seat.

Axel's eyes were wide as he nodded dramatically. "Oh yes, the legendary Tung-Shao pass, where the great heroine Fa Mulan single-handedly destroyed most of the invading forces of the infamous Shan Yu, leader of the Huns," he spoke in that same hushed voice, recounting the legend as if he were some village elder speaking around a bonfire to wide-eyed natives. His face revealed nothing, but I could see that sparkle in his eyes that showed just how much he was enjoying this. Axel's acting skills were actually quite impressive.

Sora nodded furiously, eyes wide as he drank in every detail of Axel's story. Grinning, I glanced up to see Riku's eyes crinkled into a smile in the rear-view mirror. Sora had the amazing ability to entertain everyone without even realizing it.

"And the majestic Imperial Palace!" Axel continued with a shout. "Long since abandoned by the royal family, but once upon a time it housed greatness! Walls stretching as far as the eye can see, courtyards able to hold thousands of commoners as they gathered for annual festivals in the emperor's honor, fireworks erupting from the rooftops and lighting up the sky with showers of colorful bursts of light!" Axel seemed to really be getting into his story, his hand gestures were getting more exaggerated as the drive continued on. I'd released his left hand long ago so that he could utilize both of his hands while narrating.

Sora gulped as he leaned forward even closer. He was about six inches from Axel's face by now, eyes wide as he asked the redhead very slowly and solemnly, "Are there really… dragons?"

Axel stared at him long and hard for a good fifteen seconds. The car was quiet, the only noise coming from the previously unnoticed music playing from Riku's ridiculously amazing stereo system. Sora looked like he was about to fall forward any minute, fingers gripping his headrest with silent anticipation as he leaned precariously over the seat. Axel's face revealed nothing as he simply returned my twin's fierce gaze, utterly expressionless. He seemed to be waiting for the boy to snap, or fall over. Whichever came first.

I couldn't take it any longer. I burst out laughing, gripping my stomach as I doubled over. Both Sora and Axel turned to face me almost simultaneously. Sora's expression was still one of wide-eyed apprehension while Axel's had melted into a fond smile. It wasn't long before Riku joined in from the driver's seat, though not as loud as yours truly. Sora stared at everyone confused, not sure what was so funny. He did offer a bashful smile when Riku reached a hand over to ruffle his hair affectionately.

As I finally calmed myself, Axel leaned over in his seat and pulled me into an impromptu hug. What was with this man and his need to cuddle lately? Not that it bothered me, mind you; it just wasn't something I expected from a man who went commando. He sighed contentedly as he nuzzled his face against the top of my head, arms wound tightly around my torso. The seatbelts were making things a little awkward, but I returned the gesture as best as I could.

"Aren't we affectionate tonight?" I teased, looking up at my captor. I was still a little winded from all of the laughter.

Axel smiled down at me. "I couldn't help myself. You're just too damn cute, Roxie," he responded, giving my nose a quick peck.

Sora pretended to gag in the front seat. I unwound one of my arms from around Axel's lanky body and flipped him off, resting my head against the redhead's chest. "Don't even start with me, Sora. I've got so much dirt on you and Riku it'll make your head spin," I said. "You guys are either conjoined at the mouth or the waist every time I see you, so just drop it."

That seemed to shut him up quite nicely. Sora turned around in his seat, seeming slightly affronted. This vanished seconds later however when he shouted, "We're here!"

Lifting my head slightly, I stared out of Axel's window. Sure enough, there was the ocean. The moon was nearly full tonight, and the reflection it cast out upon the endless black water was breathtaking. The streets were filling up quicker now that the weather was warming up. Pedestrian traffic was much worse than the last time we'd come back in December.

After a few more minutes of inching along the street that ran parallel to the shore, Riku turned off on some side street to park in one of the various large concrete structures near the beach. We all piled out of "Cupcake" once we'd found a decent spot on the third level and headed for the stairs.

Once we were on the sidewalk, Riku had immediately sought out Sora's hand. The two walked with their fingers intertwined, paying no mind to the stares and strange looks from many of the passers-by. I frowned. What was so significant about two guys holding hands? Just because they both had a penis didn't mean they loved each other any less than a heterosexual couple. It really didn't make sense to me. Why couldn't we just show affection in public like normal couples? Why did it always have to be a spectacle of sorts?

I sighed dejectedly, feeling a little down after thinking about the injustice of it all. Staring at my feet, I didn't even notice when I walked right into a very solid body that was stopped in front of me. Luckily, long arms reached out to keep me from falling onto my ass. I looked up and saw Axel staring down at me with a puzzled expression on his face. Funny, I hadn't even noticed him walk in front of me.

"Now now Roxie, don't go around moping on this super special night!" he chided, poking me on the nose. I blinked and he put both hands on my face, pulling my lips into a smile with his thumbs. I probably looked like a retard. "There we go, much better!" Axel said with a bright smile. I smacked his hands away, but I couldn't help the smile that had crept onto my features. The redhead simply laughed good-naturedly, slinging an arm around my waist and pulling me close as we moved to catch up with Sora and Riku.

As the two of us continued down the sidewalk I noticed a few people glancing at us unusually as well. I looked up at Axel, wondering why things have to be so fucking complicated. Having noticed my blatant staring, he looked down and flashed me a smile that made my heart feel like it was about to burst out of my chest. And suddenly, I realized something. Axel doesn't care about the obnoxious stares. Axel doesn't care about the fact that we hooked up only four days after seeing each other for the first time in months (obviously). And Axel probably wouldn't care much about all of the crazy shit I did in high school if he ever found out, due to the fact that he has/had a fairly promiscuous lifestyle himself apparently. The one making things complicated was _me_. Or maybe it was all in my head. Or maybe I was just allowing things to bother me?

God I am such a fucking _girl_.

Axel raised an eyebrow as he continued staring at me. I'd zoned out on his face, so he was probably a little freaked out. "Anyone home in there Roxas?" he asked, poking my head. His expression was mixed between playfulness and concern, as if he wasn't sure whether or not I was joking around or actually having an episode of some sort.

I shook my head vigorously, coming back to the real world. "Yeah I'm here. Let's go find those two before Riku pulls Sora into some dark corner and rapes him," I said with a lopsided smile.

Seemingly pleased with my brighter mood, Axel ruffled my hair and laughed. "Can't rape the willing, Roxie."

We finally caught up with Sora and Riku at the crosswalk. The two of them were being forced to wait for us due to the jurisdiction of the glowing red hand on the screen across the street; not to mention the cars that sped by, threatening to turn any road obstruction into a speed bump. I had to wonder how the hell those cars seemed to move so fast when we'd been barely inching along the same street only minutes before.

As the four of us crossed the street it wasn't long until our shoes were clunking against the wooden planks of the long boardwalk that stretched out over the water. Now I'd been to other beaches, mind you, but the Twilight Town pier was the most extravagant boardwalk I'd seen to date. There were shops lining either side of the long wooden roadway, selling random assortments of over-priced beach merchandise as well as Twilight Town souvenirs. Numerous seafood restaurants were scattered up and down the pier also, tempting patrons with fresh fish and a great view of the ocean while they dined.

"Ooh Riku look! I love seeing the Ferris wheel all lit up at night! Can we ride it, please?" Sora pleaded, bouncing slightly on the balls of his feet. I snickered. Sora's favorite part of coming to the pier was visiting the poor excuse for a theme park that the city had installed onto the wooden structure. There really wasn't much to get excited over; a roller coaster that moved at a snail's pace, bumper cars, kiddie rides, and one giant Ferris wheel. Oh, and one mustn't forget the plethora of overpriced carnival games. Who _didn't_ need a giant stuffed mongoose?

"I think that's a great idea, Sora," Axel interjected from the bench behind us before Riku had a chance to respond. I hadn't remembered him leaving to take a seat. "How about the four of us go grab a car?"

Uh-oh. I was experiencing some frightening déjà vu all of a sudden. Something about being trapped in a car with Sora and Riku while they made-out and I tried not to throw up; partially from their disgusting PDA and partially from my slight fear of heights. I felt compelled to intervene before something disastrous were to happen again. "Er, last time I rode the Ferris wheel in the same car as the two of them I wanted to kill myself," I said with a scowl, painful memories resurfacing from the depths of my subconscious against my will. "You think I'd be numb to seeing them all over each other by now."

Sora looked over at me with an angry pout. "We weren't _that_ bad Roxas! You're exaggerating," he whined, arms folded. Riku's lips quirked upwards into a small smile. He seemed to be amused by the entire exchange.

I heard Axel chuckle behind me as he draped his arms over my shoulders, folding his hands in front of my stomach. I felt the sharp point of his chin dig into the top of my scalp as he rested his head on mine. "Sora, Sora, Sora. This is just Roxie's subtle way of trying to get me alone. It's not your fault I'm so damn irresistible," he explained smoothly.

I felt my face heat up as I quickly elbowed the cocky bastard right in the gut. He coughed a bit as he stumbled backwards, but that quickly morphed into laughter. Sora's face had gone from angry to highly amused in a matter of seconds. He was biting his lip in an attempt to contain his laughter at my expense. Axel stumbled back over to our circle and leaned down to plant a kiss on my flushed cheek, smiling as he did so.

"Alright Roxas, Riku and I will get our own compartment then," Sora said with a wink and a leer that bordered on terrifying, grabbing his boyfriend's hand and leading him towards the giant Ferris wheel. Axel reached down to mimic Sora's action, linking his fingers with mine was we followed after the other couple, weaving in and out of the crowds.

Once we'd gotten to the ticket booth near the base of the ride, Riku bought tickets for Sora and himself while Axel paid for ours. What a gentleman. The line was pretty short, Riku and Sora hopping into a green car before the ride operator closed the door and sent them on their merry way. Sora waved ecstatically from his seat and I humored him with a quick wave in response.

"Our turn," Axel murmured in my ear. His arms encircled my waist from behind as he rested his head on my shoulder. It was difficult approaching the ride with him stuck to me like that, but we somehow managed to do it without either of us tripping over anything. I didn't miss the flabbergasted look of the young guy operating the ride as we stepped into our yellow car. I simply smiled at him, amused by his shocked expression.

I crossed my fingers as the two of us sat down in the small compartment. I hoped that I wouldn't freak out over the height this time. I was a little scared of heights to be perfectly honest. I mean, I wasn't gonna start hyperventilating or anything, but I definitely did not get too close to the edge of the car without something (or someone) to hold on to. I decided I'd stay near the center of the car for a moment or two as we began our slow ascent, and maybe I'd venture out to the circular bench that stretched around the compartment once I'd gathered enough courage to move.

As the ride slowly lifted us higher and higher I decided to be brave and lift my gaze from the floor to see the view. I stepped cautiously towards the edge, relinquishing my death grip on the metal pole that resided in the center of the compartment. I shot Axel a dirty look when he laughed at how slow I was walking. The lanky redhead was leaning casually against the wall of the small car, arms spread out on either side of him as he stared at me with an amused expression.

I slowly approached the edge of the car and shakily leaned forward, gripping the wall surrounding it tightly. Despite my fear, the view was utterly breathtaking. We were only halfway up the Ferris wheel, ride temporarily stopped to let on more guests no doubt, but already the scenery was dazzling. The boardwalk below looked significantly smaller, people moving like ants as they bustled through the various stands and buildings. Lifting my gaze to stare out over the shoreline I was captivated by the distant crashing of waves onto the nearly deserted beaches. It was still a bit cold out at night, after all it was still technically spring. Luckily, the cold meant smaller crowds.

I watched the moon's reflection as it shimmered over the water's surface below. The ocean just seemed to go on forever from here, merging together with the sky at some point, meshing into one magnificent entity. "Beautiful," I breathed out, slightly surprised that I had spoken it rather than just thought it.

"Mmhm, sure is," Axel murmured from the other side of the car. I looked over at him, having temporarily forgotten that I wasn't alone with my thoughts up here, but he wasn't looking out at the water like I had been. He was looking at me.

I raised an eyebrow at the smiling redhead. "Since when did you turn into such a romantic sap?" I asked.

Axel merely chuckled as he put his hands on his knees and got up from his spot to take the two steps over to where I was standing. "Dunno," he said, raising a hand to cup my face in his palm. His thumb was smoothly caressing my skin and I felt myself lean into his gentle touch. As I looked up to lock gazes with him, I couldn't help but notice how bright his eyes were shining in the moonlight. It was breathtaking.

Wait, when did _I_ turn into such a romantic sap?

I tilted my face upwards as Axel descended for a tender kiss. I let out a quivering breath as I felt his slightly chapped lips graze against my own, but just as I was about to reach forward to seal the deal I felt the ride jolt. I let out a very unmanly squeak and buried my head in the redhead's shirt as the ride came to life again. I guess I hadn't realized that we'd stopped.

My sudden movement had caught Axel off-guard and he stumbled backwards until he fell onto the bench, pulling me with him. I clung to him desperately; eyes clenched shut as the car swung precariously back and forth due to the sudden movement. I felt slender arms wrap around me and rub slow circles across my back. Axel was shushing me, whispering things into my ear in an attempt to calm me down as I breathed heavily into his shirt, dampening the fabric slightly with condensation.

After a few seconds I felt my breathing become much steadier as the car had stopped swinging so vigorously. Loosening my grip on Axel's shirt, I lifted my head. I nearly bumped noses with the guy, we were so close. The two of us simply stared at each other for a moment; me looking dumbfounded while Axel simply looked sympathetic.

"Scared of heights?" he asked, fingers gently dancing across my sides as he held me in his lap.

I gulped and nodded. "S-sorta," I stuttered out.

He simply chuckled and raised a hand to smooth my bangs back. "Then why didn't you say something earlier?"

I looked to the side, finding the stray thread on Axel's shoulder horribly interesting as I attempted to answer. "I just… wanted to see this with you," I managed to say after a second or two, not wanting to meet the redhead's gaze. For whatever reason, a sudden shyness seemed to take over me much too often when Axel was around.

Not wanting to look like a total wuss, I cautiously turned my face back to Axel's and was taken aback. He was positively beaming. I stared at him like a deer in the headlights for a second or two before he leaned forward and kissed me full on the lips. After the initial shock of his reaction had passed, I began to carefully return his actions, bringing my hands up to wrap around Axel's neck as he deepened the kiss. All thoughts of being hundreds of feet above the ground in a flimsy carnival ride were wiped from my mind as I felt that hot tongue teasing my lower lip and I had to bite back a groan. I opened my mouth to continue, but it seemed Axel had other ideas. He lowered his mouth to my jaw line, slowly grazing his lips against the skin with the slightest of touches, leaving soft kisses occasionally as he made his way up to my ear.

I shivered as I felt his warm breath against my earlobe. "Hmm," Axel hummed against the delicate skin, "If you want, I can help you take your mind off of the heights, Roxas," he whispered before trailing his tongue around the outer shell of my ear.

He drove me absolutely _crazy_. There was no way I'd be able to stop my body from reacting. I gasped and reached forward to clutch his shoulders firmly. Axel's fingers hooked into my belt loops as he pulled me into a more comfortable position in his lap. I repositioned my legs on either side of his waist before I leaned forward to trail open-mouthed kisses against the warm skin of his throat. I heard him hiss into my ear as he gripped my hips firmly. "_Ah, Roxas_…"

Continuing my ministrations, I grazed my teeth against his neck as I trailed my mouth down until I'd reached the juncture between his throat and collarbone. I left a trail of saliva along his clavicle as I latched onto the tender skin covering his pulse and sucked harshly. Axel groaned in my ear as I tortured the sensitive spot with teeth and tongue.

Axel brought one hand up and threaded his fingers through my hair. He pulled my head towards his roughly and attacked my lips with his own, much fiercer than before. Barely registering that the ride had started moving again, I eagerly accepted the invading tongue as it dug deeper into my mouth. I sucked on it briefly, earning a delicious moan from the redhead as his hand on my head began kneading my scalp sensually. It felt fucking fantastic.

The hand that had been gripping my waist was now slowly undoing the button on my jeans. I didn't even notice it though until I heard the distinct sound of a zipper being pulled down. I tore away from Axel, trail of saliva hanging between our bruised lips as I watched his hand slip beneath the waistband of my jeans.

Haze clearing temporarily, I'd suddenly remembered the fact that we were in fact on a _Ferris wheel_, and Axel was about to give me a fucking hand job.

"A-Axel, not _here_," I managed to get out before he wrapped his slender fingers around my semi-hard erection and I groaned loudly, forehead pressed against his shoulder.

He let out a breathy chuckle above me. "Why not Roxie? It's not like anyone can see us up here," he replied before slowly stroking up and down my shaft. God, it was agonizingly _good_.

I hissed as I bit my bottom lip in an attempt to stifle any and all noises that were threatening to erupt from my throat. I tasted blood as my teeth dug into the swollen skin sharply. Axel noticed the red droplets as they beaded against my abused lips, and he leaned forward to remedy the wound with his tongue. I whimpered slightly when he sucked on the wound, but worked to compose myself to the best of my ability in an attempt to keep him from going too far.

"Be-because we're on a fucking _Ferris wheel_, Axel!" I hissed, pushing myself away from him weakly. "S-stop!"

Having listened finally, I felt the hand that was down my pants finally cease its dangerous movements. Axel looked at me with a slightly exasperated look. "C'mon Roxas, I'm just trying to help," he reasoned, leaning forward to kiss my cheek, eyelids, nose, lips.

I stared at him as he drew away again, eyelids drooped and panting slightly. Yes, I know he was just trying to help, and fuck it felt amazing, but…

"Besides," he added with an amused look on his face, "you cannot expect me to believe that the two of them aren't doing anything up there," he added, pointing to the compartment above us which my brother and Riku were in.

I looked away quickly, not wanting to see anything remotely close to the two of them doing _anything_ up there. I didn't even want to think about it. Ugh.

Axel leaned forward and placed a soft kiss against my neck. "It'll be fine Roxas, I promise. You'll like it," he said, voice muffled slightly against my flushed skin.

I let my hands slide down from his shoulders until they were gripping his biceps through his thin jacket. "I know that dumbass," I panted out, "I just… ah, fuck it," I said before descending on his throat once more, biting and sucking on the slightly salty skin there. I felt Axel smile against my skin as he resumed his previous actions.

I swear, I can never look at a Ferris wheel the same way again.

It was about fifteen minutes later when the two of us got off of the ride. Sora and Riku were leaning against the side of a nearby building, having gotten off before us. I knew my face was still a little flushed, but hopefully it wasn't too noticeable anymore. Axel had his arm around my waist, smile permanently stretched onto his face as we approached the two of them.

Riku took one look at me, and then Axel before his face broke into a secretive smirk. I glared at him with the most sinister evil eye I could muster, but he was unfazed. Sora bounded over to us none the wiser and said, "Hey you guys! Did you have fun?"

"Oh we had fun," Axel said suggestively, receiving another elbow to the stomach.

Sora stared at me curiously before shrugging it off and turning to Riku again, reaching for his hand. "C'mon, let's go down to the end of the pier," he said with a bright smile before leading the way again.

Once the two of them were a considerable distance from Axel and me, I glared up at the playful redhead. "What?" he asked innocently, huge smile totally blowing his cover.

I simply rolled my eyes before dragging him with me after my brother and Riku. "Nothing," I muttered. "I just don't understand this fetish where you feel the need to embarrass me every waking moment of my life."

Axel stopped walking and yanked my arm so that I was flush against his chest. "Aww Roxie, I'm not trying to _embarrass_ you! I'm just having a little fun," he cooed, bending down to kiss my forehead.

I huffed, but felt my anger leaking out of me as he wrapped his arms around my waist. I leaned forward to rest my head on his chest. It was just too hard to stay mad at Axel, which was probably a good thing since he pissed me off all the time. Axel let go suddenly and I was about to say something when I felt my feet leave the ground.

"Whoa!" I yelled as he picked me up bridal style, causing quite a few people to turn and stare.

"Come on Roxie; let's catch up to the lovebirds. Trust me, it's faster this way," he said with a wink. Rather than complaining, I just let him do what he wanted for once. I mean, it's not like he ever listened to me anyway.

Sora and Riku were quite a bit ahead of us, but Axel didn't seem to be walking any faster than he had been before. I rolled my eyes and leaned back against his chest with a small smile, enjoying the rumble that I felt as he hummed contently.

"I feel bad for whoever has to clean up those things," Axel said off-handedly.

I looked up at him, still resting against his surprisingly muscular chest. "Clean what?" I asked.

He looked down at me with a devious smirk. "Oh, the Ferris wheel cars. I must say, you left quite a mess, Roxas," he chided.

I immediately felt my face heat up as I groaned and covered my face with my hands. Axel simply laughed heartily above me, enjoying my reaction immensely. He leaned down to kiss the top of my head as he continued to carry me away from the lights and sounds and out towards the end of the pier.


	14. Chapter 14

**Disclaimer: **Still don't own Kingdom Hearts. *sighs*

**Author's Note:** Alright alright, here's chapter 14. Now I have a request for all of you. As you know, your favorite fanfiction holiday (and mine) is coming up fast. That's right, AkuRoku day! Ha ha. So, I've posted a poll on my profile asking what kind of story you guys would like to see me write in celebration of such a wonderful day. The genre with the most votes will be the winner! If it's a tie, then I'll either pick which one I like best (I get some say in this too, you know) or try to combine the winners or something. You guys get to pick what type of story you want, so don't be afraid to let me know! As always, thanks for reading!

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The end of the pier was almost an exact contrast of what the hustle and bustle of the "entertainment area" was. There were absolutely no buildings out this far, only a few decrepit old benches scattered here and there. In the daylight hours, numerous fishermen would be silently lined up around the square platform, fishing rods leaning hopefully against the wooden railing and tackle boxes littering the space around their feet as they patiently waited for a bite.

At night, it was nearly deserted out here. Without any surrounding structures as shelter, the cold sea wind was brutal and biting as it blew furiously at anyone brave enough to wander this far. I could already feel my face feeling slightly sensitive, no doubt reddening due to this exposure to the harsh wind. As Axel and I neared the end of the boardwalk I decided it was about time I did something about my current predicament. I needed to salvage as much of my dignity as was possible.

"Alright Axel, I let you carry me to the end of the pier. Can you please put me down now?" I pointedly asked the tall man who was still carrying me after all this time. I folded my arms as I glared up at him, trying to look as intimidating as possible in an attempt to get the redhead to comply with my request.

Axel looked down at me with that devilish smirk, green eyes glistening in the dim light of the scattered lamps adorning the large wooden platform. "Of course I _can_ put you down Roxas, I just don't want to," he purred, pressing me tighter against him and nuzzling the top of my head for what felt like the billionth time as we approached Sora and Riku at the end of the pier. I sighed and rolled my eyes, I wasn't gonna go down without a fight.

Sora was shivering; I could see that much from where we were as we closed the distance between us and them. Riku had leaned over and wrapped his arms around the smaller boy, trying his best to keep him warm out here in the harsh elements. Sora buried his head in Riku's shirt, clinging to the fabric with his trembling hands as the older youth lazily rubbed his boyfriend's back. Neither had seemed to be paying much attention to their surroundings, however seconds later I saw both faces turn in our direction. The two of them had only just noticed our presence, no doubt clued in by my incessant nagging which had shattered the previously untainted silence, and had yet to produce any results.

Riku freed Sora from his embrace and the two of them turned their bodies to face us almost simultaneously, looks of confusion quickly becoming smug and taunting. Great. Sora was the first to open his mouth, still quivering slightly in the cold.

"H-ha. If it isn't the Princess and her Prince Charming. Glad to see you two decided to join us," he teased. I rolled my eyes at him, squirming in Axel's grip until he _finally_ agreed to relinquish me. Laughing softly at my childish antics, the redhead lowered me gently to the ground and I immediately stomped off towards the very end of the boardwalk.

"Don't worry, he's just being stubborn," I heard Sora say with a stuttered chuckle as I approached the wooden rail at the end of the pier. I looked down over the boundary into the pitch black water, watching it crash repeatedly against the wooden supports that seemed to disappear into the bottomless abyss. In the moonlight I could barely make out the hoards of barnacles that clung desperately to the thick columns. Lifting my gaze once more to the endless black ocean, I took in a deep breath, feeling the salty ocean air tingle in my lungs nostalgically.

"It's nice all the way out here," came a voice from behind me. I nodded in acknowledgement, but didn't turn around. I wouldn't have to. Seconds later the red-haired owner of the voice came up beside me, gaze mimicking mine as he watched the faint horizon. Turning my eyes away from the water temporarily, I decided to watch Axel instead. Normally once he noticed I was looking at him he'd face me immediately, mouth spurting off some unnecessary comment or shooting me that predatory leer. But this time he didn't.

I was puzzled. The look in those bright green eyes was definitely not one I'd seen before. It wasn't lust or laughter or adoration like I'd grown familiar with and seen on so many occasions before, it was a gaze that was almost longing.

I decided against asking him about it. In fact, I almost didn't have to. I felt like I could relate to that distant look in his eyes. It seemed to express the same sort of feelings I'd had when I'd sought solace in countless nights gazing over the crystal blue waters of the ocean back home. It was just one of those things that didn't require speech to convey.

Going to the beach in the day was something fun. You played in the warm water, laughing and chatting away with friends. Racing across the sand, collecting shells, doing whatever your mind told you was fun in that moment. Lounging across beach towels, relaxing under the sunlight until day had faded away into night. The sunny shores were always filled with smiles and happiness and wholeness.

Once the sun had set, this place turned into a different place entirely. The consistent lapping of waves against the shoreline was no longer coupled with excitement, but with serenity and an almost eerie calm. The water seemed to whisper as it moved, sharing some unknown secret with the wind that whistled across the rippling black surface. The beach at night was a place for thinking; for allowing yourself to temporarily empty your mind and allow its contents to run free.

I'd slipped out of bed and headed down to the beach plenty of times back in high school. Only occasionally, as I hadn't felt compelled to go much as an underclassman, and since I'd filled my agenda with other nightly activities as an upperclassman.

Still, on those nights when I wasn't out playing celebrity, I went down to the deserted shore of the local beach. I'd stare out across the water, mind guessing just how far I could actually see before the ocean blended into the sky. If I stayed longer than for a few minutes, I'd plop down in the sand, hunched over as I rested my folded arms on my knees in a more permanent position than standing. I'd sit and listen to the quiet sounds, thinking about nothing and everything at the same time. Time seemed to stop as I sat there alone, simply existing under the night sky. The stretching ocean seemed to be pulling me towards it, towards _something_. When I'd stare out at the sea, I knew I was longing for something. I wasn't sure what it was, but I knew I wasn't going to find it on Destiny Islands. Maybe it was just cabin fever.

I hadn't realized that my eyes had closed during my brief flashback. I felt my arms outstretched, welcoming the sea breeze as it whipped my clothes and swept my hair back violently. This is what I found myself doing on numerous occasions back home. I felt as if I were asking the sea what it seemed to be keeping from me, raising my arms in a silent prayer. What was I longing for? What couldn't I find there at home?

I wasn't sure just how long I'd been standing there, arms spread wide. I carefully lowered them to my side and opened my eyes slowly. I felt like my body was moving in slow motion as I came back to myself. I was half expecting to see the beautiful, clear blue water that surrounded the Islands, but I was greeted instead with the black abyss of Twilight Town's small piece of the ocean.

I glanced over to my left to see the uncharacteristically silent redhead and was slightly taken aback. He had closed his eyes as well, arms lifted in an exact replica of my previous position. His mouth was upturned in a silent smile, features seeming much more relaxed than when he'd been gazing towards the sea with such a forlorn expression before. His face looked so pale in the moonlight, causing his unusual tattoos to seem that much more prominent. I was overcome with a powerful need to see his eyes again in that moment. I wanted to see that beautiful green.

As if on command, Axel's eyes opened abruptly. He stared across the waves for a moment longer before lowering his arms and turning to face me, small smile intact. I watched him for a minute longer, taking in every feature as it shone in the moonlight, lingering on his captivating emerald gaze more than anything.

In the end it was Axel who broke the silence. "Let's go down to the shore," he said softly, almost in a whisper. I nodded in agreement. Sora and Riku had disappeared somewhere, but I pushed that thought from my mind for the time being. They were big boys; they could take care of themselves. As long as they didn't leave us behind, things were fine. I allowed Axel to intertwine our fingers as he led me away from the silent sanctuary that we'd lost ourselves in for what felt like decades.

The walk down the pier and through the bright lights and busy crowds should have been long and annoying, but my mind was still trapped in some sort of calm anesthesia as we continued, hand in hand. Bright lights and screaming children seemed to pass through my senses like smoke; not even bothering to linger for more than a second.

As the two of us silently descended towards the sand, I stopped for a moment on the worn wooden platform to remove my shoes and socks. Axel let out a brief chuckle before mimicking my actions. Once we'd undressed our feet, we joined hands again. I smiled as we first stepped onto the cool sand, relishing the feel of the grainy earth beneath my feet as I sunk slightly into the miniature dunes left from an infinite number of beach-goers. Socks stuffed into the shoes, I held my converses with my right hand as I held onto my redhead with the left one.

It must've been at least ten or so by now. We'd been here for quite a while. There weren't very many people this close to the water at this hour, especially in the spring. I saw another couple a bit farther down the beach, and a few older men stumbling across the sand even farther down that way. Besides that, Axel and I were virtually alone.

When we were about five feet from where the water darkened the shore, I sat down abruptly. Not expecting such a sudden action, Axel let out a surprised yelp and fell onto his knees beside me, hand still wrapped in mine.

"Sorry," I said sincerely, smiling despite myself.

"S'ok," he said once he'd dusted off his knees with his left hand and sat up. Bringing his knees up to his chest, Axel tugged on my hand and pulled me closer. I slid next to him, immediately regretting it once I felt some of the sand slipping beneath the waistband of my jeans.

I winced as I felt the uncomfortable particles invading my personal space. "Shit, now my pants are full of sand," I said exasperatedly.

Axel merely chuckled; bringing our hands up to his mouth as he softly pressed his lips against the back of my hand with only the slightest pressure. "Don't worry about it," he murmured against the skin, "We'll just take 'em off and shake 'em out." His other hand reached across his lap and headed for the button on my jeans teasingly, but I swatted it out of the way before it could reach its destination. Axel's laugh rang out clearly through the darkness.

"And here I thought you were being all sweet and mushy, but I guess it was just another ploy to get in my pants," I joked, narrowing my eyes at Axel as I smiled and pulled my hand from his grasp.

"C'mon Roxie, I can be sweet and mushy sometimes too," he said with a slight whine. "And for the record, I don't need a ploy to get in _your_ pants," Axel teased, crawling towards me on all fours with that predatory gleam in his eye. I began to crawl backwards, but was overtaken almost immediately. Axel caged his arms around me, leaning his face closer and closer to mine. My legs were trapped beneath his as he pressed my body further into the sand. I continued leaning away, biting my lip in a futile attempt to keep myself from smiling as his face crept closer and closer to my own. Suddenly my head had reached the end of its descent, softly colliding with the sand as I found myself completely and utterly trapped underneath my red-haired captor. Seemingly pleased by my new state of imprisonment, Axel's smile grew wider as he continued after me.

I closed my eyes tight as Axel leaned his face down to mine, and for a few seconds nothing happened. Then just as I was about to open my eyes again, I felt the faintest amount of pressure gently pressing against my lips. The kiss was so soft it that I wondered if perhaps I was only imagining it. It was… sweet. It only lasted for a second longer before the connection was broken. As I felt Axel move off of me, I opened my eyes to look at him, still lying in the sand.

"Seriously, where is this sweet streak coming from?" I asked, genuinely curious.

"Do you not want me to be sweet, Roxie? Would you rather I was _bad_?" Axel purred, winking deviously and pouncing on me again with his last word. I let out a surprised yelp as he grinned and bit down on my bottom lip, sucking on it harshly. I felt the shaky groan of pleasure crawling up through my body before I actually heard it force its way out of my throat. That wasn't supposed to be audible. Shit. I didn't want things to get carried away right now. Maybe later, but not right now. I already had sand in my pants, I really didn't need more in there (or anything/anyone else in my pants either for that matter).

Almost reluctantly, I pressed my palms against Axel's broad chest and pushed him off gently. He lifted himself until he was simply straddling my hips, one ridiculously long leg stretched on either side of me as I lie helplessly beneath him in the sand. He raised an eyebrow, smirk returning as he said, "You never answered my question, Roxie."

With the most innocent expression I could muster, I looked up at the smiling redhead before responding, "Can't I have both?"

Axel's shocked expression was almost humorous as both of his eyebrows shot up, eyes widening slightly before narrowing as his lips curved into a smirk. "Well Roxie, if that's all you wanted then all you had to do was ask," he chided, before descending for a quick peck on the lips. I laughed briefly, for no reason other than the fact that I felt completely and totally happy in this moment. Axel smiled down at me, still perched on my hips. Surprisingly, he got off of me immediately after and resumed his previous position in the sand, staring out at the water with a faint smile on his lips this time.

I stood up and dusted myself off. Pants, shirt, hair; now I had sand _everywhere_. I shook my head to try to get most of it out of my hair, at least until I could get back to school and take a shower. I heard a familiar metallic flick and looked over to see Axel lighting up a cigarette. Pocketing the small red lighter I'd been introduced to at Marluxia's party, he closed his eyes and inhaled deeply. I watched as he held his breath for a second or two before exhaling, wisps of smoke curling and disappearing into the night air. Axel had that strange distant look in his eyes again.

I sauntered over until I was standing directly in front of the redhead. He looked up at me curiously, cigarette hanging loosely between his lips as his lips curved slightly upward around it. Smiling playfully, I bent down and gently plucked the cancer stick from his mouth, holding it between two of my fingers as I teased, "You know, you're really not supposed to smoke here," before raising it to my own lips and taking a good, long drag. I still found the taste repulsive, but the effect was definitely soothing.

I watched the smoke curl from my own lips this time, amazed by the beauty that came with such a disgusting habit. I briefly wondered if I could still blow smoke through my nostrils.

"Thought you didn't smoke," I heard Axel say. He hadn't moved from his spot in the sand. I could hear the faint amusement in his voice.

I looked down at him, still smiling as I handed back the cigarette. "I don't."

He smiled as he placed the fag between his lips again. "I didn't used to," he said, looking away.

I sat down in the sand next to him. "Are we gonna have a serious moment?"

He chuckled briefly, releasing another cloud of smoke with the action. "Yep."

The two of us sat in silence for a while, simply listening to the lull of the water crashing against the sandy shore, then receding, and then repeating the same action again and again. I watched the end of Axel's cigarette glow bright with each inhalation of its toxic contents. I sighed and ran a hand through my hair, feeling even more sand fall from the wind-blown strands. "So, why'd you start smoking then?" I asked.

Axel didn't respond immediately. He took another puff or two, exhaling wispy clouds of gray and watching them disappear before he answered, "Stress relief."

I nodded, though I wasn't sure if he could see me with his eyes pointed out towards the sea like they were. I'd be lying if I said I hadn't sought out some nicotine once in a while during finals week; or something stronger. I was basically sober these days, but once in a while I'd let myself have a little something special.

"Anything in particular that stressed you out?" I asked quietly. I had weighed out the pros and cons of actually voicing the words rather than just thinking them. I didn't want to seem too nosy, but Axel had been the one to initiate the conversation. The redhead had his reasons for doing whatever the hell he did, and that was fine by me. I wasn't one to judge.

Axel was silent for almost a minute before answering. I turned my head, partially to watch him smoke and partially to await his reply. It wasn't until he'd smoked the cigarette all the way down to the filter that he spoke.

"Yeah. Started when my mom died," he said, grinding the butt into the sand.

I was temporarily thrown by the unexpected response. "I'm sorry," I managed to get out without stuttering.

"Don't be. Unless you were the bastard in the F-150 who plowed into the side of her car before taking off," Axel responded somewhat bitterly. I was stunned to silence. I really didn't know what to say. He still felt upset about it, obviously. I mean, who wouldn't? I couldn't even imagine life without my mom. She was just… my mom. She was always there, loving me and caring for me. A mom is like a safety net. Thinking about a life without her made me shudder.

The two of us sat surrounded in a pregnant silence before Axel cleared his throat. "Sorry," he began, "I don't mean to make you uncomfortable, Roxas."

I shook my head as I turned to face him. "Don't do that. Don't be sorry," I practically whispered.

Axel turned to face me, expression unreadable as he nodded. "Okay then," he said. Slowly, he reached his arms out towards me in a silent request. Complying, I crawled over to partake in his embrace as he pulled me into his lap, arms circling me tightly from behind as the two of us sat there in the sand. I heard Axel sigh heavily from above me before he laid his head on mine. I leaned back against his chest, closing my eyes and letting my fingers dance across the backs of his hands, forming soothing patterns as they remained locked around my middle. I wanted to comfort him, or at least let him know that I wasn't uncomfortable. To be perfectly honest I was flattered that he'd share something so personal with me so soon.

"What about your father then?" I asked, eyes closed. "Is he back in The Land of Dragons?"

I heard Axel chuckle humorlessly, muffled by my hair. "Dunno. Never met him."

"Shit," I hissed before realizing I'd said it. I winced, wishing I'd kept my mouth shut instead of reacting like that. Surprisingly, Axel just laughed again, not quite as darkly as he had before.

"Yeah," he said, leaning down to press warm lips against the side of my neck. "Whatever."

The two of us sat like that for a long time; Axel's lips permanently pressed to my neck as he kissed and nipped at the skin there while I allowed one hand to trail through that long, red hair. In the silence I thought about his predicament. Growing up without a father… now that was really something I couldn't imagine either. I had a great dad. Y'know, we used to play baseball together back in the day. He'd shown me how to work on the family clunker that was in the garage more often than it was on the road. Sure, he was probably disappointed when I told him I was gay, but he didn't kick me out of the house or beat me or anything. He may not have been as open about it as my mother when it came to emotions and the like, but my dad loved me.

How could people abandon their children? I never understood.

I felt a surge of shame overwhelm me as I realized just how easy my life was. The hate I felt for my brief period of "rebellion" or whatever you wanted to call it increased as I thought about what a spoiled brat I'd been. My life was rainbows and unicorns compared to some people's.

Axel's need for physical contact seemed to have elevated, if that were possible. His hands which had previously lain harmless in my lap were now teasing along the bottom of my shirt, grazing the skin beneath with feather-light touches while his lips continued their assault on my neck. I allowed my head to fall back on the redhead's shoulder as his actions grew hungrier, not wanting to stop while knowing that we should. Luckily (or not), it wasn't me who brought Axel to a screeching halt.

"There you guys are!" shouted the unmistakable voice of my twin from somewhere behind us. With a slightly frustrated groan, Axel stopped his ministrations twisted his head around. Craning my neck over the redhead's shoulder, I saw my brother jogging up to us. His speed was slightly decreased due to the soft sand beneath his feet, causing him to stumble from time to time as he made his way across the beach. Riku wasn't too far behind, hands in his pockets as he casually followed Sora towards where Axel and I had been sitting for the past… however long we'd been out here.

"Geez, we thought you guys had gotten kidnapped or something! Where have you _been_?" Sora exclaimed exasperatedly once he'd finally reached us. He was leaning over to place his hands on his knees while he caught his breath. Sora wasn't really athletic.

I stared up at my twin with a disbelieving expression. "You thought we were _kidnapped_?" I asked incredulously. Seriously, Sora jumped to the weirdest conclusions. I stood up and tried to brush the sand off of my clothes as best as I could.

"Actually Sora was the one who came up with that scenario," Riku stated calmly as he caught up to where Sora had stopped, breathing just as even as if he'd been walking casually across campus. "I just assumed Axel had whisked you away to some dirty motel, Roxas," he said with an amused grin.

Axel chuckled as he got up from the sand and repeated my previous actions of dusting himself off. He came up behind me and placed his hands on my hips. "Well I thought about it, but all the good dirty motels are on the other side of town," he replied teasingly.

Riku chuckled. Well at least _someone_ was enjoying all of these jokes about me. Sora looked up, breathing still slightly labored. "Nuh-uh, we'll have none of that mister!" he said between gasps, looking pointedly at Axel.

"Yes yes, I'll be sure to ask your permission before I do anything to Roxie here, Sora," Axel crooned, voice silky smooth and laced with sin. "I'll be sure to include _all_ of the exquisite details."

Sora blanched and Riku laughed even harder. I just buried my face in my hands.

Axel laughed a few times, reaching down to pinch my reddening cheek playfully. I shot him a scowl that he deflected flawlessly with that infamous smirk. "C'mon kiddies, let's go home," he said as he draped his arm across my shoulders, leading our strange party away from the tranquil ocean and towards the bright city lights.


	15. Chapter 15

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Kingdom Hearts, Disney, Starbucks, or anything else I've managed to sneak into this chapter.

**Author's Note:** Wow, big break since last time, huh? Sorry guys, I've been busy. Classes are back in session and school rules my life, so that's my story. I promise I won't completely abandon you all even though I've got homework and such to balance along with updating now. Writing's fun and I really love hearing from all of you. Sorry also to all of you lovelies whom I haven't talked to in a long time. Again, you can blame school, but I promise I haven't forgotten about you! Feel free to say hi, nag me for updates, or share your fangirl obsessions with me via AIM. My screenname's **NaiveSymphony** so that's pretty easy to remember. Ha ha. So this chapter turned out longer than usual somehow. More to enjoy? I don't even know what this story's even about, and I never have. Ha ha. On that note, hope you enjoy this chapter that's been over a month in the making. :)

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Aside from waking up in a cold sweat from the strange dream I'd had involving small black creatures with glowing yellow eyes, Sunday had passed by rather uneventfully. I'd successfully slept in 'til noon, something I rather enjoyed doing on weekends and days off, and decided I should probably get started on the staggering amount of schoolwork I'd been putting off for the past few days. My mountain of textbooks seemed to glare at me from across the room, somehow knowing that I had almost a week's worth of reading in each class to make up. I very nearly flinched.

The new development of having Axel around again had definitely thrown me for a loop, but I suppose it wasn't a good enough excuse to shun my duties as a university student entirely. It'd be fun trying to explain that one to my professors. "Sorry I didn't do the reading, my raging inferno of a lover is rather demanding, you see."

Twilight Town might not have been a prestigious private university like the ones in Radiant Garden or Atlantica, but I knew that my parents were spending a small fortune with Sora and me in college simultaneously. I suppose I'd already gone through my stupid, rebellious phase in high school, leaving me nothing but appreciation (and the occasional snide remark referring to something along the lines of curfew whenever I'd returned home for the summer) for my parents. I wasn't about to waste their money on my tuition by slacking off; well, slacking off _entirely_.

So, being the good little boy that I was, I spent most of the day sitting on my bed, scribbling in the margins and highlighting away at a few of my textbooks. It was hard to stomach courses like geography and economics when I was really there for the English and writing classes. These general ed courses were boring as hell, but I'd resigned myself to just muscle through as many as I could as quickly as possible. Hopefully after next semester I'd be completely finished with the obnoxious excuses for a well-rounded education and be well on my way towards my B.A.

It was about four in the afternoon when the door clicked open and my previously absent roommate stumbled in from the hallway. I watched him with a wary eye and at least one raised eyebrow (it might've been two). I'd briefly noted that Hayner hadn't been in when I'd gotten up this morning, but it was quickly pushed from my mind by the evil forces of macroeconomics. I hadn't seen Hayner since he'd run off to the beach with the girls, but I didn't think it had been an overnight trip.

"Hey Hayner, how was the beach?" I asked pleasantly, jotting down something about supply and demand in my notebook as I returned my attention to the schoolwork I needed to complete before Monday morning. He didn't reply immediately, which made me feel as if something was amiss. I looked up at him questioningly. Hayner usually barged in and announced his return the moment he stepped in the room. Sometimes you'd know he was coming even _before_ he graced you with his presence. It wasn't like him to be reserved.

"Good, good," he mumbled distractedly, eyes flickering to mine temporarily before finding something on the wall behind me incredibly interesting. He kept tapping his foot and drumming his fingers against the seams of his pants in a jittery rhythm. I watched him skeptically as he ran a nervous hand through his messy hair, looking about the room with an abysmal sort of demeanor. He looked lost. Well this was weird.

"Everything alright?" I questioned cautiously, testing the waters. I didn't want to drill him for information if he was going to turn around and bite my head off, which is what he normally did when he was upset about something, but something unusual was definitely bothering my strangely somber roommate.

"Yep, just great Roxas," Hayner answered lightly, though with a touch of hysteria that was barely concealed. His head was turned towards mine, acknowledging the fact that he was talking to me, but his eyes were still elsewhere. I pretended not to notice how obviously out of place he looked. He didn't seem like he was willingly going to tell me what was on his mind, so I resolved to simply leave him to his own devices for the time being. If it was really bad, he'd tell me; or someone. Anyone, really. Hayner wasn't exactly the keep it all inside, self-destructive type. He was more like a nuclear explosion. Everyone and their mother knew when he had a problem.

Lips quirking into an awkward, twitchy smile, Hayner turned around jerkily and sat on his bed. I shrugged and closed my economics textbook, reaching over to place it amidst the pile of junk on my desk before pulling my human geography text into my lap instead. I found it was easier to switch between subjects when dealing with classes this unbelievably dull. It helped break the monotony a little. I began to read some paragraph about the movement of Native Americans during the Western expansion. I couldn't hold my gaze to the page for too long though, not because it was horribly boring (although that might have had something to do with it), but because Hayner hadn't moved a muscle since he'd sat down. He looked petrified, sitting on his bed with his legs dangling off of the side. His expression was blank. His clenched fists were about the only outward inclination that something was bothering him, at least, to someone who didn't know him as well as yours truly. I was concerned. Normal for Hayner was stomping into the room angrily, griping about some test he'd taken that the teacher had graded unfairly or some old woman who'd given him the stink-eye at the gas pump; not sitting silently and staring at the wall like someone in solitary confinement.

"Hayner? Not to sound like a total douche bag or anything, but you're seriously freaking me out right now," I stated as calmly as possible as I closed my textbook and tossed it to the side. It bounced once on the mattress and fell on the floor, causing Hayner to flinch violently from the loud crash. I stared at my friend with a puzzled expression, hoping he'd at least hint as to why he was acting so abnormally; _something _to put my mind at ease, because seriously, this really was freaking me out.

Hayner's expression fell into one of utter defeat and he hung his head dejectedly, staring at his trembling hands. "Sorry," he muttered. If I didn't know better, I'd say it looked like he was about to cry.

The transition of emotions had me reeling. Who was this person and what did he do with my friend Hayner? Getting up from my bed quickly, I ran the two steps over to his side of the room and pressed the back of my hand against his forehead. "Are you sick or something?" I asked frantically, trying to find some sort of explanation for this behavior. It was as if some foreign being had possessed Hayner's body; he _looked_ like Hayner, but he certainly didn't _act_ like Hayner.

Growling slightly, he swatted my hand away. His eyebrows were pulled down into a frustrated expression. "…'m not sick, ass," he said under his breath. Hearing the venom in his voice, I relaxed slightly. Angry Hayner I could definitely handle; but freaky, distressed Hayner? Not so much.

"Well you're obviously not _well_ right now either," I retorted calmly as Hayner continued to stare at his hands, expression morphing again into that solemn, twitchy mask I was so unused to. I stayed where I was, slightly hunched over as I stared down at my stationary friend. The two of us were completely still for nearly a whole minute before Hayner sighed and got up.

"Listen, it's nothing. Just don't worry about it, okay? I've already forgotten," he said with a returning cocky swagger as he waved his hand in the air. I smirked, nerves set slightly at ease by the familiarity of the tone and gesture. Well this was better. Hayner may have an attitude when he gets angry (though it's usually not so depressing), but he gets over it almost as quickly. Still, his behavior from before was puzzling. I decided I should just play along and go with the fact that Hayner was fine. That was seemingly what he wanted.

I sighed, relief spilling out of me like a flood. "So, beach good?" I asked again. Small talk always seemed to be the safest thing to do after awkward situations; at least from my own limited experience. Really, I tried to avoid these things as much as was humanly possible.

"Oh yeah, it was great! Can't wait 'til summer when it gets warmer. All the girls wanted to do was lie on the beach and tan though. _Lame_," Hayner replied with exaggerated hand movements. I smirked at his animated features. Normal Hayner seemed to be back among the living.

"You didn't just leave them there when they were missing out on all the fun though, did you?" I asked, failing to keep a straight face as my lips curled into a devilish smirk.

Hayner grinned widely at me. "Nah, I grabbed a huge clump of seaweed and dropped it on Kairi's head. She screamed so loud I'm surprised you didn't hear it from here."

I laughed. We hadn't really changed much when you thought about it. Hayner and I used to pull all kinds of shit like that back in the day. We'd round up all of our friends and head to the beach on the weekends all the time in the summer when we were about fourteen or so. Tidus and Wakka would always get a game of beach volleyball going, though nobody ever really wanted to play with them since they were so damn competitive. Sora and Riku would usually be out in the water, but usually you'd only see Riku out there, laughing like a crazy person while Sora was only visible as flailing limbs and splashing water. It was a well-known fact that dunking Sora was one of Riku's favorite pastimes. The funny part was that Sora never really caught on to the fact.

The girls would always be sunbathing or "on man alert" as Tidus so subtly put it, and Hayner and I would always be coming up with ideas to bother them with. Things like burying them in sand while they slept or making farting noises whenever they were trying to catch some guy's eye. Once I'd managed to find a live crab out in the shallows while Hayner and I were playing a cutthroat game of Frisbee with Tidus and Wakka. I remember tiptoeing over to where Namine was lying on her stomach, Hayner snickering behind me, as I gingerly set the crab on her bare back before sprinting in the opposite direction. It took about five seconds for her to realize what we'd done and she shrieked like a banshee, flinging the poor creature as far away from her as she could while Hayner and I ran cackling back out into the water.

"Good man," I said to my friend with a nod. Nice to know some things stayed the same. Like Hayner's maturity level.

"Mmhm," Hayner agreed with a satisfied expression on his face. "Oh, and we ran into Pence there!" he added, suddenly very excited.

Pence was a friend of Hayner's and Olette's from middle school. He probably would have been part of our posse as well had he gone to Destiny High, but his dad had apparently been transferred to Twilight Town during their last year of middle school, forcing the family to pick up and move almost immediately after graduation.

"Cool, so is that why you were there so long?" I asked.

"Er, yeah!" Hayner replied, eyes flickering to the ceiling as he scratched at his arm. "Pence asked us to stay the night so I figured why not? I mean, I haven't seen the guy in _months_, Roxas."

"Okay, okay," I nodded, smiling. The hesitant reply had been all but nullified by Hayner's arrogant attitude. Still, it seemed I had nothing to worry about concerning the mental stability of my roommate if he was already picking a fight; at least for now.

"Did you really miss me that much Roxas?" Hayner asked coyly, batting his eyelashes and sighing dreamily.

I rolled my eyes and punched him in the arm. "Shut up," I said with a smirk.

Hayner tsked and stood up to face me, hands on his hips. "Sure… I know Roxas, there's just no more room in your heart anymore for little ol' me with your new man candy. I suppose you were just curious about my whereabouts to see if you could sneak him in for some kinky college dorm sex later tonight."

I laughed in earnest. Hayner was always teasing like this, even before we were batting for the same team. Ah, familiarity. You've returned at last.

I shrugged. "You caught me," I answered sarcastically.

Hayner laughed. "Horn dog," he joked, punching me in the shoulder. "Let's go get some coffee or something, I need a caffeine fix."

"Sure," I nodded, happy for an excuse to put off my boring general ed schoolwork for just a bit longer. I grabbed my phone and wallet off of the nightstand and shoved them both in my back pockets. Hayner was already at the door.

"Waiting for you, princess," he chided as he held the door open.

"Age before beauty," I explained as innocently as I could muster as I approached the doorway. Hayner smiled humorlessly and flipped me off before leading the way out of the room.

I subjected myself to Hayner's incessant chattering as we walked out of the building and down the path towards the parking lot. I pretty much tuned him out, nodding a few times so that he wouldn't think I was completely ignoring him (even though that's exactly what I was doing). I caught a few words and phrases such as, "that bitch in my public speaking class," and "oh man Roxas, you shoulda seen this woman's face," and "some homeless guy tried to steal my sandwich." It wasn't until we'd reached my car that I'd realized something unusual; he had yet to complain about his nagging bully problem, Seifer. I mean, usually I heard about this guy at least three times daily, but I had yet to hear mention of him even once. Very strange indeed.

"C'mon Roxas, unlock the fucking door!" Hayner snapped impatiently, breaking me from my reverie. Apparently we'd made it to my car already. I nodded and pressed the "unlock" button on the small remote attached to my keychain. Hayner flung the door open and hopped in, slamming it behind him.

"Geez Hayner, don't rip the goddamn door off. _You're_ the one always bumming rides off of me, remember?" I complained as I climbed in on the driver's side.

Hayner was already reclined so far back in his seat that he was nearly laying horizontally. "I'll pay you back some day when I'm a rich entrepreneur. I'll get you a nice new sports car, filled with sea-salt ice cream and gay porn," he replied, swirling one hand through the air while the other rested comfortably behind his head. I rolled my eyes, sighing exasperatedly as stuck the key in the ignition and started the car. "Besides, you love me," he added, turning his head towards me and making kissing noises.

"There is a fine line between love and hate, Hayner," I said distractedly as I maneuvered my car out of the spot, watching behind my shoulder to avoid any unwanted mishaps involving stupid pedestrians or other vehicles.

"Yeah, yeah," Hayner mumbled, turning his attention to the window that he could barely see out of. I glanced over at him as I pulled the car out of the parking lot and onto the main drag. He stared for a moment before turning his attention back to me and jumping right into a tirade about his math professor. I just nodded at the right times and hummed along to whatever was playing on the radio.

Starbucks may be acceptable for an instance in which one isn't near TTU, but it is a sad substitute for the greatness that is Wonderland Café. Wonderland was a local coffee shop that was a hotspot for the culture-deprived, pseudo-bohemian student populace that it appealed to. It was, for lack of a better term, _cute_. The outside looked like it was straight out of a cartoon, with uneven rooms jutting out on all sides. Each window was a different shape and size, giving the inside quite an interesting array of lighting in the afternoons. The different levels of roofing were vivid shades of purple and red, with misshapen doors shaped like hearts and spades were scattered along the outside walls. Some weren't even doors at all.

It was unique. It was cozy. It was one of those places you couldn't go to without seeing someone you knew. Basically, every college kid's place to _chill_.

A bell rang somewhere in the back when Hayner and I walked into the eclectic little shop, causing a young blonde girl to come rushing to the front counter.

"Welcome to Wonderland, what can I get for you boys today?" the dainty little barista chirped from behind the cash register. She wore the standard uniform for female employees, complete with frilly blue dress, white stockings, and black hair ribbon. "Oh! Hello Roxas!" she added, smiling brightly as she noticed my presence.

Hayner huffed. "No hello for me? Alice, I'm hurt," he pouted shamelessly.

Alice gave him an apologetic smile. "Sorry Hayner, I just haven't seen Roxas around the shop in so long, I was beginning to think he'd forgotten how to get to Wonderland."

"Aw, Roxas would never forget, Alice! Everyone ends up back here eventually, once they've been physically ill from having something other than the heavenly concoctions you create," Hayner reassured her. I nodded in agreement. She smiled and giggled.

"Hey Alice, how's business?" I asked pleasantly, finally getting a word in. Alice's crazy aunt owned the shop, meaning the poor girl had worked here since she was of legal working age; though she was always seen carrying boxes and doing various other chores even before then. Still, she always seemed in good spirits, though I wasn't sure how anyone could put up with her hag of a relative.

"Oh, just splendid!" she answered excitedly, smiling and dusting off her white lace apron. "Auntie's been sick though. I've been running home to check on her every few hours or so," she added tiredly.

"Well you gotta take it easy once in a whi-"

"_There_ you are!" came a voice from the back room. The three of us spun around almost simultaneously to see Kairi emerging with a hard expression marring her features, coffee-stained apron tied snugly around her waist. She was pointing one accusatory finger in our direction, though I had no idea what for.

"Listen Kai-" Hayner began, but was cut off for a second time.

"I don't want to hear it! You and I need to talk, mister. Alice, I'm taking my break," the irritated redhead said as she untied her apron and threw it rather forcefully onto the counter. I watched in silence as Kairi grabbed Hayner's elbow and dragged him to a table near the back of the shop. "Hey Roxas," she said quickly over her shoulder as she passed. I heard Hayner complain about not getting his coffee as the two of them walked away.

What was that all about? Was she still miffed that he dumped seaweed on her head or something?

Alice turned to me, expression reverting back into one of ignorant charm. "The usual for you, Roxas?" she asked cheerfully, tucking a piece of hair behind her ear.

"Uh, yeah," I responded, eyes still on my two friends who were apparently having a heated discussion in the far corner of the room. Alice smiled and turned to make my drink (a large vanilla latte in case you were just _horribly_ curious), humming a happy tune to herself as she did so.

Grabbing a seat near a pear-shaped window, I took the time to lazily scan the rest of the shop. There weren't too many people at the moment, which came as a surprise to me. Usually the place was packed with students, either typing something up on their laptop or flipping through the pages of some massive textbook. Apparently they even had a live band on the weekends, though I had yet to see for myself. I wasn't normally a Wonderland patron after five o'clock or so. The caffeine hit me like a punch to the face if I dared drink any past then.

As I dully noted the fact that the couple three tables over from me were redefining PDA and repulsive at the same time, something else caught my eye. The bright orange booth against the wall nearby was sporting a very unique hairstyle that I thought for certain I'd seen before. Almost as soon as I'd taken notice of the fact, Alice called my name from the counter, causing the head I'd been staring at to whip around to face me almost immediately.

"Roxas!" Demyx squealed delightedly as he leapt out of his seat and practically threw himself over to where I had gotten up to retrieve my drink.

"Hey Demy-" I began, but my words were muffled by a faded black t-shirt as I was crushed against his chest in a powerful hug. I was thankful that I had yet to pick up my coffee, or I might've dropped it from the sheer force of the guy's exuberant greeting.

"It's been so long; I'd forgotten how adorable you were!" Demyx cooed as he continued to squeeze the living daylights out of me. I wondered if he'd notice if he accidentally choked me to death. Nah, he'd probably just keep hugging me.

"Demyx, I saw you three days ago," I said, though I doubt he heard me as my face was still buried in his shirt, morphing whatever I said into gibberish.

Finally relinquishing me from his grip, Demyx allowed me to take a few steps back as I tried to catch my breath. "Come sit with us!" he insisted. Well, seeing as I'd been temporary robbed of my drinking buddy I suppose it couldn't hurt. I looked to the side of him to see who "us" was. I saw two other men sitting at the table he'd come from. One with long black hair tied into a ponytail and what looked like an eye patch. I'd definitely never seen him before. The other was unmistakably the blonde basket-case who'd driven Axel and me home the other day. Luxord, the homophobic gambler. Our eyes locked and he quickly looked away, spilling some of his drink in the process. I couldn't help but grin. Demyx's hands were still on my shoulders and I vaguely wondered what he'd do if I tried to escape from this potentially awkward mingling session, but before I could even say anything he'd looped an arm around my shoulders and steered me towards their table, making my decision for me.

"Roxas, your drink!" Alice reminded me from the counter. I turned to retrieve it, expecting to do so alone, but Demyx's arm was seemingly stuck to my shoulders.

"Thanks," I mentioned as I pulled a five out of my wallet and slid it across the counter. I wrapped my fingers around the pleasantly warm cup and brought it to my lips, tasting the drink gently as to not obliterate my taste buds. I sighed contentedly as Alice cheerfully sorted through the cash drawer. Wonderland had stolen my heart once again.

"So, you two know each other?" Alice asked as she handed me the change, eyes flickering to the arm still slung over my shoulders.

"We have a mutual friend," I answered glibly, taking another sip from the steaming vanilla latte and tugging Demyx away from the counter.

"Roxas is Axel's _squeeze_," Demyx said with a wink as he pointed his finger at me like a pistol with his other hand. I choked on burning liquid and Alice's cheeks turned a vivid shade of pink.

"Oh!" she said, hand covering her mouth. "I didn't realize-"

Demyx laughed as he patted me on the back half-heartedly, though it wasn't helping my windpipe whatsoever. My throat was burning as I tried to inhale without drawing more scalding hot coffee into my lungs. I was still coughing when the two of them started talking again, though trying not to make a scene; although Demyx might have already successfully achieved that when he launched himself at me earlier.

"It's cool, Alice. Hey, I'll have Xig drop off the lineup for next weekend on Wednesday, sound good?" he asked. Alice nodded jerkily, quickly turning around to busy herself with something behind the counter as Demyx led me over to where his friends were sitting.

"Axel's working today, or he'd probably be here too. Oh, he's gonna be so jealous when I told him I ran into you!" Demyx said excitedly, bouncing slightly as we walked.

I coughed a few more times for good measure, just to make sure I wasn't gonna have a fit again. Throat tender, I asked weakly, "Where does he work?"

"Y'know that old music store downtown owned by that crazy guy with the dreadlocks? Not out near the ocean, it's farther inland. It's called the Back Alley. I think it's right next to a sex shop or something,"

Yeah I knew where that was. "Hm, I don't know where that is."

"It's cool. It's just to pay the bills Axel says. That and the few random shindigs he does around town, editing music videos for local bands and stuff. He's working on snagging an internship with Disney this summer though, after we graduate. He's got connections or something," Demyx prattled on as we approached the two men seated at the bright orange booth.

"Hey guys, look who I found! This is Roxas," Demyx introduced. I waved briefly to the two men who'd turned to face us. Luxord nodded in acknowledgement, but the other guy seemed to be studying me skeptically.

"Whoa whoa _whoa_, you mean this little spot of sunshine's what's got Axel cock-whipped?" the guy with the eye patch asked in blatant disbelief.

Demyx nodded excitedly, still hugging me to his side. I couldn't remember if he was always this hyper or if perhaps an added dose of sugar and caffeine had contributed to the crazy. Hard to compare though since the last time we'd seen each other he'd had quite the buzz going. Oh he'd get along just great with Sora if he was always this bubbly.

"Isn't he just precious?" Demyx cooed as he pinched my cheek between his fingers.

I swatted his hand away. "Stop that."

"Careful Dem, you know how Axel gets when you touch his things," eye patch guy said with a smirk. "Name's Xigbar by the way, and this bastard," he added, thrusting a thumb over his shoulder at the blonde in the corner of the booth, "is Luxord, though I've heard you've met," he said with a wicked grin. I supposed the story of Luxord's torment after driving Axel and me home had gotten around some way or another.

"So Demyx, who's on for next weekend?" Luxord asked, quickly changing the subject away from the story of our awkward meeting after Marluxia's party.

"Um, so far it's just us and one other band, though the deadline to sign up isn't 'til Tuesday night so we'll see," Demyx answered as he _finally_ let go of me and slid into the booth. I sat down beside him, opting not to run out of the building nor stand there like a doofus.

"So long as it's not those Heartless pansies, I'm good with whatever," Xigbar quipped from his seat across from mine.

I must have let a mildly confused expression slip through my placid composure, or Demyx really just enjoyed telling me things (probably the latter), because he turned and explained, "The Heartless is a chick band that plays here sometimes. Larxene's their head lady. Basically, they suck. Our fan base outnumbers theirs by at least ten. We're the house band."

"You're in a band?" I asked curiously. Though it didn't seem surprising. Demyx was totally the poster child for some washed out eighties punk group with synths and strobe lights and all that jazz. I had to suppress a grin.

Demyx smiled and nodded vigorously. "Yep! Me and Xigbar," he said, pointing to himself and his apparent band mate, "and Marluxia."

"Marluxia?"

Xigbar nodded his head and sighed as he leaned back in his seat. "He may be one weird motherfucker, but goddammit is he wicked on the bass," he added in reverence.

Both Demyx and Luxord laughed in agreement. I smiled. This wasn't as painfully awkward as I'd worried it'd be. Suddenly I was spun around by my shoulders to face a very wide-eyed Demyx. Maybe I'd spoken too soon.

"Roxas! You totally have to come hear us play this weekend! It'll be awesome! And Axel will be there! He always films our shows. C'mon you gotta! I promise you'll enjoy it, pleeeeeease?" Demyx managed to get out in one excited breath.

I was temporarily stunned. The words had flown out of him. Like vomit. "Uh, sure," I spluttered out stupidly.

"Great!" Demyx said with a big toothy grin. "I wish we could chat more, but I think your friend's trying to get your attention over there." He pointed somewhere over my right shoulder.

I turned around and sure enough, there was Hayner shooting me pleading glances from across the room. Kairi had apparently gotten up and put her apron back on to work, but she was far from being through with whatever beef she had with my troubled roommate. She was leaning over him, tray full of drinks balanced on one palm while her other hand was planted firmly on her hip. I couldn't hear what she was saying, but her lips were moving really fast. Hayner turned to me and mouthed the words "save me" with a desperate look in his eye. There's my cue.

"Okay, I guess I'll see you guys later," I said as I got up.

"Nice meeting you little dude," Xigbar said with a wave and a wink, or maybe he just blinked. Luxord just nodded.

"You. This weekend. Seven o'clock. Right here," Demyx said pointedly. "I know where you live," he added threateningly.

"Right, right. Sure thing," I replied with a brief smile and wave as I turned to save my friend from whatever hole he'd dug himself into.

Hayner saw me coming and his expression relaxed, though he was still on the receiving end of a seemingly painful tirade from Kairi. She didn't stop nagging him even once I'd approached the table.

"…didn't even know what you were doing. I swear Hayner, that was a really stupid move- oh, Roxas! Sorry," Kairi said as she cut herself off from whatever she'd been saying before. "I didn't mean to ignore you this whole time, there was just something I needed to talk to Hayner about," she added apologetically.

"I think I'm just gonna walk back, Roxas," Hayner grunted out as he scooted his chair away from the table. I nodded and stepped out of his way so he could get up. He looked pissed, but there was some other emotion buried there beneath his eyes. Fear? Regret? I couldn't tell. Damn, I didn't think Kairi would get so pissed about a little bit of seaweed. I watched him leave, shoulders slightly hunched as he leaned against the door and stepped outside.

"Friends of yours?" Kairi asked politely as she nodded towards Demyx's table.

"Yeah," I said, turning my attention back to her. I didn't really want to go all technical and whatnot, mentioning how they were actually Axel's friends whom I'd met at random. Too much hassle. Also I didn't really want Kairi to attempt to delve into the twisted depths of my "love life" at the mention of my fiery lover.

"Hmm," was all she said, smiling and heading off to a different table. Apparently with Hayner gone she felt obligated to return to what she was doing before, so I was forced to follow her around the shop as she collected dirty dishes and brought drinks to other tables.

"Why were you so pissed at Hayner? Not just because he dumped seaweed on your head, right?" I asked. Really I had no other clue as to why there'd be tension between the two of them. I couldn't help that I was curious.

Kairi chuckled humorlessly, but didn't look me in the eyes. "No, it's not that, but I was pretty mad at him for doing that too now that you mention it. He just did something stupid and I felt I needed to bring it to his attention," she said distractedly as she busied herself about the shop.

"Oh," I said, still following her and glancing occasionally over to Demyx's table whenever we'd walk buy it. Apparently he'd said something funny, or stupid, since both Luxord and Xigbar were clutching their sides and pounding on the table with their fists in raucous laughter. "When are you getting off?" I asked as I turned back to Kairi, trying to think of something better to talk about rather than gossiping about one of my best friends.

"Six thirty," she answered, facing me with a tired smile as she stopped to pick up a few empty mugs from the couple I'd seen all over each other earlier. I briefly considered suggesting that she test those for herpes or something. "Don't feel obligated to stick around if you don't want to Roxas, I'm a big girl. I'll be fine." She pushed open the swinging door leading to the area behind the counter and stepped in, resting her head against the back wall as she set her tray down. Alice had disappeared into the back somewhere, and there weren't any customers up front at the moment, so I figured I could spare a few minutes. I leaned forward onto the counter on my elbows and kept talking.

"Nah, it's cool. I've got nothing to do anyway," I said, temporarily choosing to forget the stack of textbooks eagerly awaiting my return. "How was the beach?"

"God, the weather was _fantastic_," Kairi answered. "I can't wait until summer when we can go every day," she added longingly. She stepped up and slumped forward onto the counter, resting her head on her folded arms. Not two seconds after having doing so, she snapped up again. "Oh I almost forgot! Pence invited us to come and stay at his parents' beach house whenever we want to this summer! Isn't that amazing?" she asked excitedly.

"Great!" I said with as much excitement as I could muster. I wasn't really one to wear my heart on my sleeve, so it was hard for me to sound genuinely happy about something even when I actually was. I constantly joked (and sometimes truly believed) that Sora had gotten all of the touchy-feely emotions and I'd just gotten all of the reject ones. Like apathy. "So is that where you guys all stayed last night?" I asked.

Kairi gave me a very calculating look, hesitating before she spoke again. "Did Hayner tell you that?" she asked carefully.

I looked at her with a puzzled expression. Where'd the mysterious act come from all of a sudden? "Well yeah, he said you guys ran into Pence and he invited everyone to spend the night. Did you all stay somewhere besides his parents' beach house then?"

"No, we stayed at the beach house. Well, _most_ of us," Kairi continued cryptically, tracing her fingers up and down the sides of one of the mugs distractedly.

"What?"

Kairi gave me an interesting expression as she picked herself up off of the counter and collected her tray of dirty mugs and dishes. It looked as if she was simply going to disappear into the back and leave my question unanswered. However, just before she disappeared behind the door she said, "Hayner wasn't with us last night."

Well what the fuck was _that_ supposed to mean?


	16. Chapter 16

**Disclaimer: **Still don't own nothin'

**Author's Note:** Wow guys, I'm really sorry for the ridiculously long break. It's hard for me to find time to write at the pace that I want to when I'm in school, so I sort of had to put a halt to the fanfiction writing for a while. But, I'm on break for a few weeks so I'm going to do my best to give you guys some new stuff! I have been writing over these past few months, just not enough to post... until now! Ha ha. This can be my Christmas present (or just a present if you don't celebrate Christmas) to you guys! This chapter is kind of filler-ish, but hey, it's important too. Thanks for being such awesome readers you guys, I really appreciate it. :)

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Monday morning came as most Monday mornings do: way too soon and way too early. After hitting the snooze a few too many times and very nearly missing my first class, the day was off to a bit of a rough start. I'd left Wonderland shortly after my chat with Kairi, making sure to say goodbye to a still slightly flustered Alice before I left. Hayner hadn't been in the room when I'd returned, but I hardly expected him to be. When he got in one of his moods he'd disappear for hours. No particular destination in mind, he'd just walk until he wanted to come back I guess. He never really elaborated beyond that when we'd discussed the matter of his "excursions."

After finishing up my economics lecture I had about an hour until my next class, so I headed over to the small on-campus convenience store to grab something to make up for my missed breakfast. After leaping into the ceaseless line of students that filed through the place like an assembly line, I managed to make it out alive. Strawberry pop-tart in hand, I plopped down at one of the many tables situated just outside of the store. I pulled my iPod out of my pocket and slid the earbuds in, intent on enjoying my rare moment of peace without some form of work to do. I hadn't even turned the thing on though when I felt my cell phone vibrate in my other pocket. Sighing, I went ahead and hit shuffle for the sake of having some form of music playing. The melancholic tones of Death Cab for Cutie began drifting through my ears as the exterior screen of my phone told me I had a new text from a certain self-proclaimed god of sex. I really needed to change Axel's contact name, it had too much potential for creating an embarrassing situation in the future.

_Busy?_

Unable to recall when Axel was in class on Mondays, I sent back a simple _nope_.

I put my phone down to attend to my much-desired pop-tart. Scarcely ten seconds after sending the text, my phone was vibrating again, though this time from an incoming phone call from the aforementioned man.

"Hey. Whaf up?" I asked, majority of the pop-tart shoved into my mouth.

"_Hey babe, are you on-campus?"_ Axel asked. I could hear the dull roar of people talking in the background on his end.

I swallowed thickly, feeling every corner of the thing as it travelled down my throat. "Yeah, I'm in-between classes right now. Why?"

It was silent on the other line for a moment, but then, _"Wanna ditch your next class?"_

I couldn't prevent the chuckle that escaped my lips. I thought a moment before answering playfully, "Tsk tsk Axel, pressuring me to ditch class for you?"

"_C'mon Roxie, it'll be fun, I promise," _he purred through the receiver as enticingly as possible.

I thought for a moment. My next class was just my geography lecture, nothing incredibly important. I could probably afford to miss a day. I mean, all the professor ever did was talk for an hour. The assignments were all posted online. "I suppose missing once wouldn't hurt," I trailed off.

"_Atta boy,"_ Axel exclaimed triumphantly from the other end.

I laughed. "Your bad habits are rubbing off on me, Axel," I joked, pulling out my earbuds and stuffing my iPod back into my jeans.

"_Baby, I'll rub off on any part of you that you want,"_ Axel moaned theatrically into the phone, voice dropping an octave. My face scrunched up in disgust. I couldn't tell if he was being serious or messing with me.

"Is this your idea of a booty call?" I asked in an effort to sound threatening, though the laugh that I choked on made any attempt of sounding upset null and void.

"_It can be if you want it to be, sweetheart. So where exactly are you?"_ Axel inquired.

"Near the engineering building. I'm in front of the convenience store that's right there in front of it."

"_Ah, alright. Be there in a jiffy," _Axel quipped before hanging up.

Remainder of the cheap breakfast pastry hanging from between my lips, I shoved my hands into my pockets, deciding against pulling out my iPod a second time. Well, I suppose it was a relief to consider the fact that my day was technically over now, seeing as how I wasn't planning on going to my geography lecture. I sighed contentedly and leaned back in my chair as I munched on the last few remnants of my pathetic breakfast, taking the time to really appreciate the beautiful spring weather for a change. It's hard to notice things like sunny days when you've got your nose jammed into a book or pressed against a computer screen for most of the daylight hours.

Spring was slowly turning into summer, meaning that the semester would be over soon and I'd be moving home. Such was the fate of a dorm rat like yours truly. I wondered what would happen to Axel and me once we weren't in the same city anymore. Not to mention the fact that this was Axel's last year at TTU. The thought made my mood sink slightly. I hadn't really thought about the fact that Axel was graduating this spring, meaning that he'd likely be off to bigger and better things once he had a degree under his belt.

"Roxas!"

My ridiculously tall lover shouting and grinning at me as he hopped up the stairs to the little patio full of tables pleasantly cut off my thought process, however. I couldn't help but smile; he seemed so genuinely excited to see me. I'd be a liar if I were to say it didn't make my pulse quicken just a bit.

"Hey you," I greeted pleasantly as he slid into the seat across from mine. "Are you usually in class around now?"

Axel leaned forward on his elbows, grin spread wide from ear to ear. "Technically yes, but I don't usually go. We had a test today so I had to show up, but I finished early cuz I'm so damn smart," he stated with a quick laugh. "Sooooo I thought I'd see if I could whisk you away for the afternoon," he said with a slow wink.

"Don't get used to it, unlike you I actually go to my classes on a regular basis," I said with a smirk.

"Ouch Roxie," Axel said, flinging himself back in his seat and clutching his chest for emphasis. He always had a flair for the dramatic. "Do you ever remember me missing class last semester?"

I looked up as I tried to recall Axel's attendance habits from our class together. "Actually I don't," I answered with a tone of surprise. I couldn't think of a single day in which Axel hadn't dragged his desk over to mine to complete our work together, or just to dick around for the whole time.

Axel crossed his arms over his chest and smirked at me. "See? I braved waking up early, horrible morning traffic, and numerous post-weekend hangovers just to see your cute little face twice a week." He finished by leaning across the table and pinching my cheek, which I promptly ended by smacking his hand away, though I knew he could see the pink tinge that was burning my face. Axel chose to say nothing; simply grinning at me with that sly smile as those alluring green eyes seemed to peer right past my poorly manufactured façade of nonchalance.

He got up slowly, dusting off his ridiculously tight pants in the process. Holding one hand out to me he asked, "Ready?"

Nodding, I laced my fingers between his, noting just how long and thin Axel's were as he traced meaningless patterns on my knuckles. I wondered briefly if he'd ever considered taking up piano.

The two of us walked towards the bus stop with our hands held tightly together. Axel dug around in his pocket with his free hand before whipping out a pack of cigarettes. Fitting one between his lips he glanced down at me briefly. "Want one?" he asked, voice muffled slightly as the cigarette bounced up and down with every syllable.

I smiled and shook my head, politely declining. He shrugged and swapped the pack of cigarettes for his little red lighter. Igniting the end, he hummed to himself as he crammed the lighter back into his pocket. Blowing smoke out from his nostrils effortlessly, he tugged me in the direction of a couple of benches. Sitting himself down on the faded green metal, he yanked on my arm so that I fell into the spot beside him.

Axel began to drum mindlessly to some tune I didn't know on the back of my hand as he puffed away at his rapidly shrinking cigarette. I smiled and leaned back against the uncomfortable bench, relishing the moment. Feeling the warm sun on my face and Axel's fingertips softly tapping on my hand in a staccato rhythm while the smoke gently invaded my senses was so, _perfect_. I felt as if I had truly learned the definition of happiness in that moment.

"So," Axel stated as he brought his cigarette away from his lips, tapping the end to let the dangling ashes swirl to the ground before bringing it back to his mouth again. "I heard you ran into the guys at Wonderland."

I nodded. "Yeah, briefly. Demyx basically threatened to kill me if I didn't come to their show there this weekend."

Axel chuckled. "Yeah, well that's Demyx. It'll be cool though, I think you'll really enjoy it. The guys, they call themselves The Organization, they're pretty damn good."

I nodded quickly, contemplating whether to utter the sentence that was dancing on the end of my tongue or to let it be. I paused, but then added quietly, "They also mentioned that Larxene's band will be playing there too."

The hand holding mine had ceased its gentle ministrations and gripped my hand firmly in response. "Don't worry Roxas, I'll make sure she doesn't do anything," Axel said protectively, undertone of anger lacing through his voice almost invisibly.

"I know," I said in the most placating voice that I could muster. I paused again before adding, "Actually, I ran into her and Marluxia the other day," I trailed off. I felt Axel's entire demeanor slump as he sighed forlornly. I glued my eyes to the ground in shame, staring down at the cracked pavement and immediately wishing I hadn't said anything.

Axel mumbled something incoherent as he dropped the smoldering butt of his cigarette onto the pavement and ground it out with his foot. He brought his hand up to massage his temple gingerly as he sighed again, "I know. Marly told me." He turned abruptly towards me, and I looked reflexively. There was a terrified look in his eyes as he stared down at me with a desperate expression etched onto his angular face. "Listen Rox," he started, voice cracking slightly, "I just want you to know that I've done some stupid shit in my life, and you're welcome to judge me for that, but I just wanted to tell you that it's all in the past. I'm a reformed man, I swear." He squeezed my hand once more for emphasis.

I forced myself not to break his gaze, despite the terrifying intensity that was radiating from his expression. I shook my head as I looked up at him, "Axel I – what Larxene told me didn't change my opinion of you… really!" I reassured him as he shot me a look of blatant disbelief. "I don't care that you used to sleep around or whatever. We all do things that we regret," I told him, a rush of confidence surging through me as I continued. I grabbed his other hand and gripped them both tightly with my own hands. "It doesn't matter to me what you did before I knew you. I'm not going to tell you you're a bad person for your choice of lifestyle because… because I like you for who you are now, and I mean I-" but I was cut off when our bus pulled up in front of us, causing Axel to stand slowly, pulling me with him.

I'd been so close to telling him, so _close_ to spilling the beans and just leaving myself completely vulnerable before him. My raucous lifestyle of the past seemed like this huge burden that I carried over me, and I knew that I had to tell Axel before too long or it would drive me completely crazy.

"C'mon Roxas," Axel said quietly, but I thought I detected the hint of a smile rising onto his features as he led me to the bus that seemed to be waiting so impatiently for its patrons to board.

Entering behind a parade of students, Axel and I headed to the very back. He let go of my hand to place it on the small of my back instead as he motioned for me to sit near the window. Stumbling awkwardly into my seat as the bus started again, Axel chuckled richly as he settled in next to me.

As I stared out the window, dully noting the students on the sidewalks as we drove out of the main campus, I felt Axel's hand tentatively find mine as it rested on my right thigh. I opened my palm, allowing our fingers to tangle once again. I felt him shift as he leaned over and slowly pressed his lips right up against my ear. I held back my shudder as his hot breath ghosted over my flesh. "So Roxas, what do you want to do on your day off?"

I closed my eyes as I felt Axel's teeth begin to lightly graze my earlobe, playfully nibbling as he waited for my answer. "Hmm, I dunno. What did you have in mind?" I asked quietly.

Axel chuckled breathily into my ear before responding. "Well I could take you out to lunch somewhere. Or we could just order a pizza and watch a movie back at my place if you'd prefer."

Finding the thought of snuggling with Axel on a sofa in front of a glowing television screen was greatly outweighing the idea of a lunch date at the moment. "Pizza sounds nice," I sighed as he continued teasing my ear with his teeth.

"Alright, pizza it is then," Axel concluded as he pulled away from my ear, briefly planting a soft kiss on my cheek before he sat back into his seat again. I laughed to myself, causing Axel to raise an eyebrow as he looked at me with an amused expression. "What's so funny?" he asked, smiling.

I shook my head. "I dunno, I just assumed your intentions for getting me to play hooky for a day would be much more… impure," I admitted with a sly grin.

Axel's smile quickly morphed into a leer. "Well Roxie, they can become much more impure if you'd like them to. Just say the word."

I laughed. "We'll see."

The ride to Axel's apartment didn't take too long. It was about twenty minutes later when the redhead was reaching across me to tug on the cord trailing above the bus windows, signaling the driver that the next stop was ours. When the bus finally slowed, we got off at a very familiar-looking intersection. I remembered coming here twice before, once in my own car and once in Riku's. Axel led me down the sidewalk until we reached the place where he had been leaning against the wall when we'd picked him up that one time.

"How long have you and Demyx lived here?" I asked as we approached one of the numerous side gates.

Axel hummed as he dug through his pockets for the gate key. "Oh, I'd say about a year and a half. We started the lease before the beginning of the last school year. Aha!" he said in triumph as he pulled the small silver key from his back pocket, effectively sliding it in and unlocking the rusty black gate. Axel gestured grandly as he swung it open, and I laughed softly as I was ushered onto the premises. "It's just up here on the right, apartment number thirty-seven."

The two of us walked down a winding sidewalk, littered with flower petals that had apparently fallen from the grove of trees that seemed to block out all sunlight from illuminating the grounds. Axel turned once we'd reached the second building and pulled out a different key from his pocket. I looked up to see a brass 37 bolted to the maroon-colored door before us. The door swung open and Axel gently pushed me forward before following in after me. He locked the door behind him once we'd entered. Turning to me and smiling widely he announced, "Well, welcome to our humble abode!"

I checked out my surroundings as I stepped farther into the apartment. It was pretty nice considering it was being paid for by two college students. The living room was right in front of us, large flat-screen television filling up most of the north wall. I noticed two doors off to the left. "That's my bathroom," Axel said, pointing at the door closest to the entryway, "and that's my bedroom," he added, gesturing towards the other door. "The kitchen's over to the right, and so is Dem's room. I'm gonna call Domino's and get us some lunch so go ahead and pick out a movie Rox."

Axel whipped out his phone dialed while I walked over to the DVD rack next to their ridiculously nice television. I scrolled my eyes down the list of titles as I heard Axel chattering away behind me. To be perfectly honest, I hadn't even heard of a lot of the movies here before. I went ahead and assumed that Axel had some sort of weird, eccentric movie taste due to the fact that he was into film and such. Of course, there were still the classics such as Star Wars, Titanic, Jurassic Park…

"Pepperoni good for you Rox? I figured you could just pick 'em off if you don't like it," Axel asked as he came up behind me.

"Yeah that's fine," I answered distractedly, turning around to face him. "By the way, how the hell did the two of you get such a nice TV?"

Axel laughed. "Because Demyx is a spoiled little mama's boy, that's how. His parents found us the place, bless them, and bought most of our furniture and appliances as well."

My eyebrows shot up. "Wow. That's nice of them."

Axel smiled fondly. "Yep, they're real sweet people. They've basically treated me like a son for the past few years." I nodded and the two of us just stood there for a moment in silence before Axel turned to the hallway with a slight smirk, kicking off his shoes in the process. "Go ahead and get comfortable Roxas. Did you pick something to watch?"

"Er…" was all I said as I slipped out of my shoes and went to put them near the door where Axel's were. He looked down at me and grinned, raising his eyebrows expectantly. "Well I honestly don't know what half of the movies even _are_ to tell you the truth," I admitted sheepishly, scratching the back of my head.

Axel merely laughed good-naturedly, ruffling my hair as he walked over to the tall stack of DVDs that I'd previously been stumped over. "Well we can pick something you've seen already if you'd like, or are you feeling adventurous today?" he asked playfully.

I merely shrugged and smiled. "You pick."

"Alright, alright," Axel said as his fingers began to trace down the cases until he came across whatever he had been looking for. "How about Garden State?" he asked, holding up a case where a boy and girl's faces were depicted across the top.

"Uh, sure. I've never heard of it."

"Never heard of it! Roxas, my love, I was trying to go for the familiar here, but it looks like I've got a severe case on my hands. It appears as if I'm going to have to educate you on the topic of good cinema," Axel proclaimed, popping the movie out of its case and heading over to the DVD player on the other side of the television.

I shoved my hands into my pockets. "Heh, alright then Axel," I agreed before turning around to seat myself on the couch. I couldn't help but be amused as Axel proceeded to hum some flowery song to himself rather loudly as he fiddled with the electronic equipment.

Grabbing the remote, Axel came over and plopped down next to me, the force causing me to bounce slightly. He laughed and laid his head in my lap, pressing play once the main menu came onto the screen.

"Flip that switch just by your head there, will you Rox?" Axel asked. I turned to my left and reached for the light switch on the wall, pressing it and sending us into semi-darkness. The glow from the TV and the slivers of light that shone in from between the blinds were all that illuminated the room now.

As the movie began, I let one hand trail through Axel's long tresses of hair as he lay there in my lap. He hummed happily, bringing his hand up to occupy the one that wasn't currently playing with his hair. As our fingers laced together for what felt like the hundredth time that day, I smiled to myself. I was watching the movie, but I was more focused on the smiling redhead in my lap. I allowed my fingers to gently massage his scalp occasionally, taking pauses between weaving my fingers through the silky red locks. Looking down at my unusually calm lover, I could see his eyelids fluttering as he fought hard to stay awake. It was one of the most adorable things I had ever seen.

It was about twenty minutes into the movie when there was a knock on the door. Axel abruptly got up, shaking his head to rid himself of the grogginess that had overcome him. The part of his hair where my hand had been was sticking out rather unusually, and I couldn't help but laugh a little. Pulling his wallet out of his back pocket, Axel greeted the pizza man and paid him, re-entering the room with the large cardboard box. Sitting down in front of the couch, he tugged on my pant leg to get me to join him on the floor.

As the two of us sat there, eating delivery pizza and watching some film that I'd never seen before, I was overcome with another earth-shattering wave of happiness. This was just so _easy_, and I loved every moment of it. I was being completely myself around Axel, and he seemed to like me just the way I am. Even better, the feelings were mutual. If I didn't know any better, it seemed as if I might be really falling for the redhead.

I let my head fall onto Axel's shoulder with a content sigh and he chuckled softly, bringing his own head down to rest on top of mine. "You're so cute Roxas," he said sweetly.

Once all the pizza had disappeared and Axel had kicked the box away, the two of us had climbed up onto the couch again. Axel had stretched himself across the length of the sofa, and I'd laughed and asked where I was supposed to sit. With a fiendish glint in his eye, he'd pulled me down on top of him so that I was lying across him. Rolling my eyes with a gentle smile, I slid my arms underneath his to encircle his midsection as I rested my head on his chest.

Axel had begun running his hands through my hair as I'd done to him previously. After a moment or two I felt him lean his head down and take a long whiff, burying his nose in my scalp. "Your hair smells amazing Roxas," was all he said, voice slightly muffled.

I laughed. "Thanks."

Axel pressed his lips to the top of my head. Suddenly I felt his hands on either side of my face. His hands guided me to face him, and then gently lifted my face to his as he planted a firm kiss right onto my unsuspecting mouth.

"Axel…"

He let out a low growl as his lips began a trail from my lips down, down, down. I was finding it harder and harder to pay attention to the movie when his mouth was slowly opening up against my skin in such a tantalizing way. When the kisses reached my neck I was beginning to feel extremely hot in such close proximity with the man. Axel began to suck and bite gently on a few places along my throat, and I could tell that my breathing was growing rather erratic as things progressed.

"Axel," I breathed out, "You're missing the movie," I said in a weak attempt to stop his ministrations before things got out of hand.

"Already seen it," was all he muttered against my now damp skin as he continued his pleasurable assault on a few tender spots across my neck. I could barely restrain the keening noises that seemed so eager to tumble forth from my lips.

Axel's hands, which had been slowly tracing circles on my lower back, were now wandering as well. I could feel his fingertips dancing at the bottom of my shirt, tickling the skin underneath with their featherlike touches. It wasn't long before I felt my resolve crumbling as I caved into their silent request and allowed Axel to slowly, teasingly drag my shirt up and off of my body before dropping it unceremoniously onto the floor.

Things were heating up really fast, I was panting hard while Axel's hands and mouth were gradually working me into a pleasure-filled frenzy. I had torn his lips from my neck to bring them crashing into my own, ignoring the smirk that had lingered upon them as I began to kiss the life out of the fiery instigator. The movie was still playing in the background, but I only caught bits and pieces of it. My attention was elsewhere. I'd managed to keep pretty quiet so far, but when Axel's roaming hands slid down and gripped my ass roughly, I couldn't stop the soft moan that escaped from between my lips.

"Roxas," Axel groaned against my now panting mouth, "Do you want to take this into the other room?"

We kissed again, and again, and _again_, before I lifted my head up to answer. I could feel my eyelids growing heavy, mouth open slightly as I answered, "Hell yes."

Grinning a sultry grin that seemed only to make me melt that much more, Axel lifted himself up and wrapped his arms around me, effectively lifting me off of the couch and carrying me back towards his bedroom. He closed the door behind him as he stumbled towards the bed. I felt my bare back come in contact with the sheets before Axel was caged over me, kissing me over and over again with insatiable hunger while his hands left trails of fire across my skin. Neither of us seemed too concerned over the movie anymore.


	17. Chapter 17

**Disclaimer: **Not mine.

**Author's Note: **Wow guys, I suck. Really sorry for being away for so long. To be honest, I read this story now and just want to throw it away. BUT, I promised I would finish it so that's exactly what I'm gonna do! Who knows when though? Ha ha. I sure don't. Well, I hope that if there are any readers left that they enjoy this chapter. It's been half-written for months, but I finally buckled down and finished it. Still more to come! Thanks to everyone who stuck around with my sorry ass! You guys are truly the best.

* * *

"In high school Demyx talked me into playing triangle in the band for one semester just so I could go on the end of the year trip to Disney Castle with him."

"Ha ha I can totally see you doing that. Umm, when I was a kid I was deathly afraid of the tooth fairy."

"No shit? Well I guess the thought of some broad in a tutu sneaking into your room in the middle of the night is a bit scary. Hmm. Oh! My uncle has an alligator farm in Deep Jungle."

"Wow, I've definitely never known anyone in the alligator farm business before. Uh let's see… my Dad used to be a minor league baseball player."

"My dream job at the age of six was to be Superman."

"I'm pretty sure that's every six year-old's dream, Axel."

"Really? Ok then I'll think of a better one. Umm, oh I know! Once, when I was totally drunk off my ass, I gave a homeless guy a ride to his spot under the freeway overpass."

My exhausted body shook with laugher as I conceded defeat. I was already worn out beyond belief from Axel's ravenous appetite in bed and I could barely breathe between giggles. "Axel that is such a 'you' story," I panted out once I'd calmed down some.

He looked over at me and grinned widely, fingers twirling through a few strands of hair near my ear. "Oh yeah? What's that supposed to mean, sweetheart?"

I searched my brain for a witty response for him, but before I had a chance to say anything the oaf had rolled over on top of me, thin sheet sandwiched between our otherwise naked bodies. Laughing weakly I uselessly pushed at his chest. "Axel get off, you're heavy," I whined beneath him.

"Don' wanna," he mumbled into the pillow we were now sharing.

I sighed in defeat and let my arms fall to my sides, relishing the feel of the cool sheets beneath me in contrast to the warm body above me. Axel shifted and slid his arms around my back, slowly caressing the smooth skin before encircling my waist and pulling me closer in a firm embrace. Had the room not been completely silent I would have missed the soft noise of contentment that buzzed in the back of his throat for scarcely a second. I smiled. Despite my earlier complaint, I rather liked the closeness and security I felt having Axel's body covering mine. I could feel my eyelids growing heavier. After our sweaty romp between the sheets earlier, adding to the tiredness lingering from my unpleasant morning, a nap sounded heavenly. And the gentle breeze that softly played with the dark curtains as it drifted through the open window seemed to be coaxing me into a tranquil slumber.

Both Axel and I jolted up when someone began banging furiously on the bedroom door.

"Hey are you guys done yet? I let you have your fun, now come visit with me, I'm lonely out here!" a voice that was unmistakably Demyx's nagged from behind the locked door.

Axel laughed, somewhat embarrassed. "Shit, I didn't even hear him get home," he said. He sighed before pushing himself up on his elbows and smiling tiredly. "C'mon Rox." Axel leaned down to peck my lips briefly before throwing the sheets off and sliding out of bed. He yawned and reached above his head, stretching his ridiculously long body in a way that distinctly reminded me of a cat before scratching his stomach and looking around the room. I sat up in an effort to get out of bed myself, but was thwarted by a jolt of pain that shot up my spine. I flopped back down in defeat, choosing to bury myself in the Axel-scented blankets instead.

"Now where are my pants… oh, there they are," he laughed. "Geez Roxas, that's quite an arm you've got on you," Axel praised with a lewd wink as he picked his jeans up from the other side of the room, waving them like a trophy. He laughed and started pulling them up his slender legs, hopping once to get them all the way on before zipping and buttoning.

I glanced around the room from my cocoon of bed sheets. "Uh Axel, where are my boxers?" I asked him as he rummaged through his closet for a new shirt.

He laughed. "I dunno Rox, I just sorta threw 'em somewhere," he said before his eyes joined mine in a quick scan of the room. "Oh, there they are. Hanging on the dresser," Axel said, chuckling as my now well-traveled underpants' hiding place was revealed. I reluctantly unwound myself and scooted off the bed to grab them. "On second thought," Axel mumbled before lunging forward and grabbing them just before my own hand grasped the fabric. He grinned and twirled them around one finger. "Maybe I'll just keep these as a souvenir," he added with another wink.

I rolled my eyes. "Axel that's gross. Give them back," I said, holding out my hand expectantly.

He stuck out his tongue. "No," he sang like an unruly child. "I should take your pants and shirt too and just have you walk around my apartment naked. It's a _much_ better view in my opinion," he added with fiendish delight, obviously liking the idea a great deal.

"Axel," I whined, "Not while Demyx is here."

The redhead's eyebrows shot up. "So you'd do it if it was just me and you? Oh I am _so_ holding you to that Rox," he said excitedly before throwing my underwear in my face.

I grumbled as I yanked the blue shorts off my head and slid them up my legs until they were firmly in place. Axel chose to ignore the various curses I was muttering under my breath and instead slid on a bright orange band shirt that clashed magnificently with his hair. He unlocked the bedroom door and trotted out into the hall while I retrieved the rest of my clothing from its various locations across Axel's floor. I could hear Demyx and Axel talking animatedly in the other room as I quickly dressed myself before following the echo of voices.

"I can't believe you didn't leave me any pizza you pig," Demyx whined to Axel as I walked into the TV room. "Oh hey Roxas!" he greeted brightly when I rounded the corner. "Nice sex hair." Demyx winked and gave me a thumbs up.

My hands flew to my head as I furiously tried to fix my disheveled hair. Axel and Demyx just laughed.

"God, if he isn't just the cutest thing. Remind me again how a tramp like you landed this angel?" Demyx asked Axel enviously, hip cocked to the side as he tapped his foot impatiently. Well someone had definitely taken more than their daily-recommended dose of gay this morning.

"I dunno Dem it's like, I just opened up my arms and there he was," Axel said in disbelief, as if explaining a life-changing miracle that he had witnessed.

"Screaming 'Harder Axel, harder!'" Demyx added with a snicker. I felt my face flush to my ears.

"Nah that's not it, I'm plenty hard. It was 'Deeper Axel, oh g-god right there!'" Axel replied, moaning like some amateur porn star.

"Keep this up and you won't be hearing either," I quipped.

Axel raised his fingers to his lips and motioned that he was zipping them shut, smiling all the while.

Demyx laughed louder. He raised his hand and made a motion like he was cracking a whip, complete with sound effects. " Xigbar was so right about you dude. You're fucking whipped."

"Yeah well, Xigbar's full of shit," came Axel's witty reply.

"True," Demyx answered thoughtfully. "Anyway, I'm gonna order take-out. I had to go into my voice instructor's office hours and completely skipped lunch. Do either of you want anything?" he asked as his eyes flitted between the two of us while brought his phone up to his ear in slow motion.

"Well I dunno about Roxie here but I am _definitely_ hungry after our wonderful afternoon of fun. I'll just get the usual, Dem," Axel said, patting his stomach before looking at me expectantly. "Want anything Rox?"

"I dunno, didn't we just eat like," I glanced around the room for a clock, eyes locking on the digital numbers displayed on their microwave, "holy shit was that three hours ago?"

Axel smiled proudly. "Yup! So I'll take that as a yes? You do like Chinese food, right? Mushu's is the only place that does it right here, not like back home at all."

"Yeah yeah I'll get whatever you're having," I replied distractedly, ignoring whatever comment Axel had made to Demyx about ordering for his wifey while I tried to comprehend the fact that Axel and I had been going at it for nearly three fucking hours.

Heh. Fucking hours.

Well I guess if you considered the fact that after a quick tension-relieving romp in Axel's bed we'd moved to the bathroom in a half-assed attempt to get cleaned up which had _really_ just resulted in some amazingly steamy shower sex. Then once we'd actually washed ourselves and turned the water off I'd barely made three steps toward the towel rack before Axel had picked me up and started furiously kissing my severely marked neck, clumsily stumbling out of the bathroom until he was tossing me down onto wrinkled sheets for another round. Then yeah, I guess the three-hour thing wasn't quite so alarming after all.

"Rooooooxas," Axel sang as he waved a hand in front of my face. "That sweet little blush tells me you're thinking of something dirty," he taunted.

I scoffed and shoved him away lightly. He merely chuckled before bending down and planting a warm kiss on the side of my throat, tongue flicking over one of the numerous love bites he'd left.

"Christ Axel, his neck looks like someone's beaten him or something," Demyx remarked after hanging up the phone. "Possessive much?"

Axel wrapped his arms around my shoulders and rested his chin on the top of my head. "Mmmaybe. It's not my fault Roxie's so tasty," he added before leaning down and _licking my face_.

"Ugh, Axel that's gross!" I said, pushing him away only to have his surprisingly strong arms pull me back firmly against his chest.

"Oh stop it both of you, you're being so cute it's making me physically ill," Demyx snapped as he rubbed his stomach soothingly. "Or maybe it's just because I haven't eaten anything today."

"Or maybe it's because you haven't seen Zexion today," Axel laughed against my scalp before squeezing my shoulders one last time and releasing me from the cage of his arms.

Demyx sighed longingly as he blew a piece of hair out of his face. "Yeah that too."

"Invite him over, we'll have a party," Axel offered, clapping his best friend on the shoulder.

Demyx shook his head. "Nah, I already did. He's grading papers."

"Zexion's a teacher?" I asked. I had assumed he was just another college student like the rest of us. I mean, what kind of self-respecting adult comes to a college party for fun? Unless they're really desperate I guess.

Demyx nodded shyly and scratched the back of his head as a faint blush started to form on his cheeks. Axel nodded furiously in response to my question, shit-eating grin fully in place.

"Not just a teacher Rox, a _professor_. An English professor at _TTU_," Axel said. If his smile could get any bigger I'd be worried that the corners of his mouth would tear. My eyes flew to Demyx, silently begging for confirmation.

"Eh, I had him for a poetry class and well, we just sorta hit it off," Demyx admitted sheepishly. The dopey grin on his face was a dead giveaway.

"Dem went to office hours for a little more than just extra credit that semester, if you catch my drift," Axel said, eyebrows wiggling.

"Oh hush you. It was not like that and you know it," Demyx said, slapping him on the arm.

Axel nodded grumpily, rubbing where he'd been slapped. "Oh yes, I better than anyone would know _exactly_ how the course of your relationship went. Every day it was 'Axel, Zexion said the funniest thing today,' or 'Axel sometimes when he looks at me, I just _know_ he's the one,' or even, 'Oh Axel he remembered my name! He didn't call me Dennis today!'" he rambled bitterly.

"Oh come on, don't even get me started on how you get all googly-eyed whenever you talk about _Roxas_, you closet romantic," Demyx said, finger pointing menacingly at Axel's nose.

I just stood and half-listened as the two of them bickered back and forth. The way they fired back insults or complaints or jabs or jokes to each other was so fluid, continuing without a moment's pause. The two of them acted as if they were putting on a well-rehearsed play. Axel would say something mean and Demyx would reflect it immediately only to have Axel made a dirty comment and Demyx would retort with some embarrassing story of his own and on and on and on. Frankly, it was hilarious.

"Yeah okay mister, don't make me tell Roxas the treadmill story!"

Axel's eyes widened dangerously. "You wouldn't _dare_."

"Try me," Demyx responded with a sly smile. Almost on cue, the doorbell rang and he turned to retrieve our second helping of delivery food for the day.

The rest of the evening continued in pretty much the same manner. Demyx and Axel were great company. We spent the next few hours channel surfing in front of the TV with our chopsticks and take-out boxes while the two of them took turns commentating on whichever show was on. My sides hurt from laughing when we finally decided to call it a night.

"Ok Axel, you've gotta get this squirt home. Isn't there a rule that says people under the height of five feet have to be indoors by eleven or something?"

"Hey, I'm taller than five feet!" I said.

"Sure you are, kiddo. Let's get you home though, it's past your bedtime," Axel said, ruffling my hair as he stood up.

I looked up to the clock on the wall. "It's not even 10:30," I responded flatly.

"Yes but you see, Demyx needs his beauty sleep and the most polite way he can think of to get you out of the house is to poke fun at the fact that you're vertically challenged," Axel explained as he picked up the cardboard take-out boxes that were scattered about the room, checking to see which ones were worth saving and heading towards the refrigerator.

"Aw Roxas that's not true! I'd love to have you stay over longer, I just figured you'd wanna get back at a decent hour seeing as how it's a school night and all," Demyx said, lips pulled into a pout.

"That and the fact that he wants us out of the room when he calls Zexy up for some phone sex later," Axel shouted from the kitchen.

"Axel!"

I laughed, against my better judgment. Demyx shot me a look, but rolled his eyes and got up. "Ha ha, very funny. Hurry up Axel or you'll be coming home when all the crazies are out!"

"Yes _Mom_," Axel said, exiting the kitchen and extending his hand towards me. "Shall we?"

I grabbed his hand, using it as leverage to pull myself up off of the floor.

"You got all your stuff? I don't wanna be walking back in here and interrupting Dem during his _private time_," Axel asked.

"I'm going to _sleep_ you douche bag!" Demyx shouted from the far bedroom.

"Tell Zexion we say hi!" Axel said one last time, opening the front door and ushering me out.

I chuckled lightly. "Do you two ever quit?"

Axel laughed too. "Aw, Demyx knows I'm just messing. He should be flattered, I only tease the people I like."

I raised an eyebrow as we walked towards the gate. "Oh really?"

Axel looked down and smiled. "Oh definitely. Why else do you think I bother you so much?"

"Hmm I dunno. Maybe you're just a dick like that?"

Axel hissed, holding a hand to his chest and wincing. "Ouch Rox, why are you constantly breaking my heart like this?"

Laughing, I looked up at him again. "I dunno, maybe it's because I like you?"

The smile I got in return was stunning. Before I knew what was happening I felt my chin cupped by a warm hand as Axel kissed me roughly. "You're just too goddamn cute," he muttered against my lips.

I was a little disappointed when he pulled away, but I suppose I really did need to get back to school. I could already think of a few quizzes I should've been studying for. We walked in near silence towards the bus stop on the other side of the street, and like magic, a bus seemed to materialize out of nowhere just as we sat down.

"Damn. Good timing."

Axel laughed as he followed me down the dimly lit aisle towards the back of the bus. "Dem probably looked up the times on his iPhone. He's always doing shit like that," he said, plopping down into the seat next to the one I'd chosen.

"Well that's awfully nice of him."

"Mmhm," Axel murmured, leaning on me heavily as he buried his face in the crook of my neck. "S'just how he is."

The two of us sat in silence for a few minutes. My eyes scanned the bus, dully taking note of the other patrons. Some homeless guy with a flattened cardboard box and a bad sunburn, one morbidly obese woman with a couple of grocery bags littering the space around her feet, and a teenage girl wearing way too much eyeliner, bobbing hear head to the screaming that was leaking out of her pink ear buds.

I jumped slightly when I felt Axel's fingertips delicately graze the side of my throat.

"Sorry," he said.

"For what?"

"These." Axel's fingers lingered over the newly formed bruises that were now covering a great deal of my neck.

"Oh. It's no big deal, I'll just ask Kairi if I can borrow some of her cover-up."

Axel snorted, breath scattering a few stray hairs that dangled in front of his face.

The two of us sat in silence for the rest of the ride. I thought that Axel might've fallen asleep on my shoulder, but he'd reach up to scratch his face occasionally. I just sighed and watched the city pass by outside.

The bus stop for the dorms seemed to come a lot sooner that I remembered. Reluctantly, Axel lifted himself and scooted out of his seat. I followed behind him until we were outside on the sidewalk that curved up to where the dorm rats like myself lived.

"I'll walk you to your building," Axel said.

"Um, okay. Thanks."

Axel just nodded. I shoved my hands into my pockets as we walked towards the scattered brick structures. I kept trying to initiate conversation while we walked towards the cluster of buildings that was The Sandlot, but I couldn't think of anything to say. Axel was usually the one who talked more anyway, but he was being unusually quiet all of a sudden.

"Who's that by your car?" said redhead asked suddenly, breaking the silence.

"Huh?"

Axel pointed. "Over there, there's some guy leaning on your car. Do you know him, Roxas?"

I squinted towards the parking lot, eyes searching for where my car was parked. When they fell upon where it was, my blood ran cold. There was indeed a man leaning against the back bumper of my car, arms folded as he waited patiently. His long silver hair fell like a curtain over the shoulders of his black trench coat. I stopped in my tracks.

"Roxas? What's wrong?" Axel asked, stopping next to me.

As if he could somehow hear my name from where he was standing, the black-clad man looked up. I watched as he straightened himself and began walking towards us at a slow and steady pace.

I reached up and clutched Axel's arm tightly, not noticing him wince when my fingernails dug into his skin. "We have to go. _Now_."

"Wait just a second Roxas, what's the matter?" Axel asked, concerned eyes searching mine for an answer as he wrenched his arm from my grasp and put his hands on my shoulders.

"It's h-him." I trembled where I was standing, eyes slowly drifting to where the approaching figure loomed. My eyes locked with smirking yellow and I wanted to run, run far away.

Much to my surprise, Axel shoved me out of the way so that he was standing between me and the dark-skinned man who had now come to a halt not three feet away from us. I felt him squeeze my hand tightly.

"Who are you? What do you want?" Axel barked. I was shocked. I'd never heard him sound so hostile before. I cowered behind him as that regrettably familiar voice responded.

"My name is Xemnas. I'm a… _friend_ of Roxas' so to speak. I've come to see him." Xemnas smiled at me from where I was peeking out from behind Axel's back before bringing his gaze back up to the redhead. "And, you are?"

"Name's Axel," he responded shortly. I was silently relieved that he didn't tack on 'got it memorized?'

Xemnas' eyebrows lifted slightly as he appraised Axel. "Hmm. And how do you know my dear little Roxas, if I may ask?" Xemnas said, eyes cold as he locked them on Axel's own.

"I'm his… boyfriend."

I gawked at Axel in surprise. Despite the fact that I was inches away from the man that I feared most in the entire world, Axel's words couldn't help but warm my heart. I clutched the back of his shirt tightly.

"Boyfriend?" Xemnas' eyes glittered dangerously. "Oh dear Roxas, what have you been doing while I was away? Or rather, _who_?"

"What?" Axel asked before turning around to face me, eyebrows twisted in confusion. "Roxas, who is this guy? Is he your…"

"No!" I shouted before he could finish. "I can't stand him! Xemnas is a horrible, _horrible_ man. I don't want anything to do with him anymore!" I tried to explain frantically. I could see the confusion clouding those green eyes that I'd grown so fond of recently, and it tore at my heart.

"Tsk tsk Roxas. It really pains me to hear such hurtful words come out of such a pretty mouth," Xemnas interjected. He hadn't moved an inch, but somehow I was suddenly aware of how close his presence was. I took a step back.

"Don't," I said weakly, voice coming out as little more than a whisper.

"What? I'm sure your little boyfriend knows all about your pretty mouth, your porcelain skin, and all the pleasures derived from them," Xemnas said, voice even as his eyes slitted and his lips curled. "But… does he know just how many have delighted in the pleasures of your smooth skin, Roxas? Does he know just how many times those plump lips have been parted in want? How many names have descended on that sweet tongue?"

"That. Is. _Enough_."

Axel was seething now. I could see his fingers trembling before clenching into fists. He turned to face Xemnas completely, jaw clenched and eyes narrowed. "Don't you _dare_ talk about Roxas like that. I don't care who the fuck you are. If Roxas doesn't want you here then I sure as hell don't want you here either."

Xemnas chuckled darkly. "Ah, but you don't understand. I'm here to collect a debt you see. I'm sure Roxas knows what I'm talking about."

He took a single step forward and Axel snapped. I stood there, staring in complete and utter shock as Axel lunged at Xemnas, cocked his fist back and punched him in the face. _Hard_. And did it again, and again, before Xemnas was aware enough to fight back. He grunted and threw Axel off of him. I flinched as he landed heavily on the asphalt. Xemnas was much bigger than Axel and I was suddenly worried more for his safety than my own.

"Stop it! Enough, both of you!" I screamed at them, but my plea fell upon deaf ears.

The two of them continued to roll around on the cracked ground as a tangle of thrashing limbs. Xemnas punched Axel in the nose with a sickening crack, suddenly setting off a torrent of blood that went spewing everywhere. Somehow Axel managed to throw Xemnas off him, sending him flying in the opposite direction. Wiping his nose as he got up, Axel trudged over to where Xemnas lie on his back. He kicked him sharply in the side and Xemnas yelled in pain.

"Get up. I'm not finished."

Xemnas opened one eye and rolled over. It looked as if the fight had been won, but a shimmer of metal in Xemnas right hand caught my eyes. A knife.

"Stop! Axel, no!"

But it was too late. Xemnas had leapt up in the blink of an eye and locked the unsuspecting Axel in a chokehold, butterfly knife at his throat. "You… don't play fair," Axel said, breath hitching as the metal was brought closer to the skin stretched tight across his neck.

Xemnas merely chuckled breathily. "Now Roxas," he said, panting heavily as he struggled to hold a squirming Axel, "your little plaything doesn't need to be harmed any further if you just come along quietly with me."

"Roxas, don't listen to him-" Axel shouted, but was cut off when Xemnas brought the side of the blade closer against his throat. A trickle of blood began to cascade down from the shallow wound. Axel's eyes were screaming at me to run and my feet wanted nothing more than to obey.

I felt defeated. Xemnas had waltzed back into my life of his own accord and proved to me that I hadn't grown, I wasn't strong. I was just as weak as ever, and now he had me playing right into the palm of his hand. Again.

I took a deep breath and looked him dead in the eyes. "If I say yes, you'll let Axel go?"

"No, Roxas, don't-" Axel began, but was cut off again by the blade against his throat. His eyes were pleading, _don't do this_. I tried to send my own message back to him. _I have to._ I wasn't about to let Xemnas take him from me. He'd taken everything else.

I took one nervous step forward, staring right into Xemnas' eyes as I did so. I tried so hard not to look at Axel, but it was hard. His face was so close to Xemnas' and his eyes were so big and hurt and angry and beautiful.

"That's right Roxas, come to me," Xemnas said coolly, almost purring. I didn't break eye contact with him as I came forward slowly. My mind was racing with scenarios to try and free Axel, but none of them seemed like they would work. They kept getting pushed out of my mind by horrible memories. Memories of those commanding yellow eyes.

I stopped right in front of the two of them, using all of my willpower not to look at Axel's face that was just inches away. Xemnas smirked. "Now Roxas, show me how much you _want_ me. Just like you used to."

My eyes refused to look away from Xemnas' face. I couldn't bear to see Axel right now. I wished somehow he couldn't see me either, that he would close his eyes and pretend this wasn't happening and that I wasn't the dirty, used-up piece of trash that I was.

I closed my eyes tight; partially to halt the flow of tears that was threatening to spill from my eyes and partially to try to kid myself into imagining that this wasn't happening. Why had I gotten Axel involved? I should've never even gone over to his place today. I shouldn't have held hands with him, or laughed with him, or kissed him, or flirted with him, or talked to him, or sighed against his shoulder after we'd had sex. I should have never gone with him to coffee after he ran into me in that goddamn sex shop. I should've let him walk out of my life forever. _Again_.

A pair of lips that were definitely not Axel's caught mine in a possessive kiss. I clenched my eyes shut and tried to pretend. I tried to pretend that I was kissing Axel and that we were together and having a great time and Xemnas wasn't even a flicker of a thought in the back of my head. I whimpered when I felt teeth sink down deep into my bottom lip, drawing blood. I tried to ignore the fact that I could hear a second person breathing near my neck. Each time I thought about it the tears came dangerously close to leaking from between my closed eyelids.

A slick tongue was forced into my mouth with a grunt, and I couldn't help the sob that escaped when my lips reluctantly parted. My mind screamed in protest. This was _not_ what I wanted.

Suddenly I heard Xemnas gasp and cry out as he retracted his intruding tongue and curled his body inward. He groaned in pain and staggered backwards. I took a shaky step away from him, unsure of what had just happened as he fell to the floor. Axel stood over his crumpled form, twirling Xemnas' bloodstained knife between his fingers. "Guess I don't play fair either," he said.

I looked up at him in shock. "H-how did you-"

Axel smiled grimly at the blade in his hands. "Plucked this out of his hand when he was getting… distracted."

Xemnas was moaning and writhing on the ground. I looked down to see his hands clutched between his legs. When he pulled them away they were stained a deep red.

"W-what did you do?"

Axel looked down at Xemnas' huddled form for a few seconds before addressing him, "I may like cock, but I certainly did not appreciate feeling your nasty prick poking at my back. Hope you got the message." He pocketed the weapon and grabbed my hand in a surprisingly gentle grip. "C'mon Roxas. We'll let the campus security pick his sorry-ass up. Maybe they'll pick his penis up for him too before it gets too dirty."

I couldn't help the laugh that I choked out, but it quickly became a precursor for a maelstrom of relieved sobs. Axel slid his arm around my shoulder and held me close as the two of us walked towards my building, never once looking back.


End file.
